A fire burning gracefully in the center, the core
Ashes to life, reborn once again
Remember the eyes that pierce through the pouring rain
The strength that causes nightmares, destroying the ending
I am the Phoenix warrior
I am the fire that burns and licks at your own darkness
I am the woman to bring you down
I am the goddess come to reclaim her honor
Alone in your broken throne room we will fight
A graceful dance of swords, of mental strength
Metal ringing in the ears as my dance is swift and graceful
Burning desire pulsating in my veins
Blood of my own flesh burns the rug beneath our feet
Your own defeat freezing over my heart
The coldness you control melts away
The ice surrounding me, encasing me
The fire of the reborn, the ready bursts forward
No longer am I human as I walk forward
The flames bursting from every pore
Taste defeat love
Throwing you aside I watch with dark green eyes
Pushing past my brinks, my own locks and chains
Into the throne chair you sit in demise
There you will breathe the last of your betrayel
Call my name
And maybe I'll remember my word
But I never promised to be there for you, remember
I promised to never hurt you
Call my name fallen queen
Your reign has now ended with the sweep of one hand
Move away, your life is spared
Descend from the broken throne
Allow the rightful ruler to bear the symbol
Fear the darkness that the fire proclaims
Taste the end of your destruction
Prepare for a new beginning
Reborn again
I am the Phoenix
Reborn once more
The world
Author notes
Written October 3rd, 2006
A contest entry
- Animal by Thoughts-of-Soloman.
1800 points, ended September 23, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Phoenix by Forgotten Anomaly.
700 points, ended April 6, 14 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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This is a fantastic poem, very well writen. I like the imagery, metaphor, and word choices you used in this. The concept was also very creative. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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I read:
1, You have used the mythological Phoenix to symbolise an interior power and strength of 'elemental' transformation.
2, A light and dignity reclaiming its right as such.
3, An interior battle in oneself, possibly of identity?
4, Things are not what we think, when we realise this a possibility for greater vision and recognition is opened up.
5, '... Taste defeat love' I can't read this easily, should it read 'Taste defeated love'? OR 'Taste defeat, love' as an address to someone?
6, ... Okay maybe it's to do with a successful revenge in some manner of justice.
The rest reads to me like a dramatic tale of an avenging super hero who then gives mercy to his enemy. The problem for me is that it goes on long and I'm never sure what cause is being fought for or against what enemy. It seems very rich and dramatically enthusiastic but I fail to find a central meaning with enough weight to pin it all down. I also find little which directly relates to the prompt idea of 'Animal' other than the references to the Phoenix, rebirth and fire which have been lost in the lengthy dramatics.
I do realise that this wasn't written specifically for this contest and my comment isn't intended as a criticism of your write in itself. I find it richly dramatic and well written... however not 'Animal' enough for this contest here.
Thank you for the pleasure all the same
and all the best to you.
Sol
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From Ice Queen to Pheonix warrior. Quite a transformation. Very vivd.
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this is an amazing poem. you've done an outstanding job writing this. thank you for entering this in the contest. i am so glad that i read it. it was such a beautiful poem. the flow and strength you show is great. you did an amazing job on this. i don't really know what else to say. it was great.
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