Your skin of velvet sky,
the neverending, vastness of your heart.
Your hands on me, floating,
gliding like the clouds.
The lightness, the darkness,
of your sunrises and sunsets.
Your days of scorching heat,
Your days of numbing cold.
And I sit under you, my sky.
So full of wonder, so full of hope.
For tomorrow you will rise.
Tomorrow you will lead me,
with your infinite amount of pure love.
And I will follow you.
The sun of your first words,
the moon of your goodnights.
And I wish under you, my sky.
For I see a falling star,
brilliantly glowing and sizzling
across the openness
of the velvet sky that makes you.
I've never questioned, I've never doubted.
That falling star is me.
Tumbling, racing, tripping over itself to reach...
you.
To reach your mind, your soul, your heart.
So that It may,
So that I may,
frolic across the radiant, infinite sky
that you have become.
And forever will I reach for you.
I see the stars in your eyes,
the unmeasureable time of your love,
and the undefinable bond that we share.
I've come to you, trembling,
overflowing with hopes, dreams,
tears and needs.
And I sit under you, my sky.
In awe of your perfection.
Author notes
I know this is long but I feel it flows rather well together instead of rambling on. There is a lot of nature in this poem that are related to feelings. Scorching heat-anger. Numbing cold-sadness, etc. I'm...in love with this piece. And hope that it is enjoyable for others as well.
Written September 30th, 2006
A contest entry
- Love & Nature by Miss Yorik.
300 points, ended October 27, 2006, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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excellent
very nice poem, your good!! great work!!
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Wow!
I loved that again. Really did flow nicely with so much feeling. The last few lines..."ive come to you trembling,..." finished it up so solidly. Great write!
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Love is like sky!
For tomorrow you will rise.
Tomorrow you will lead me,
with your infinite amount of pure love.
And I will follow you." i liked the poem so much. I never got this idea.I appreciate your imagination and imagery. You can picture life and love well. Take care
dear fire.
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Love it <3
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Excellent write!
Hello ICaughtFire,
You have painted this beautiful poem with words of love! Now that is artistry! Wonderful imagery, the feeling of serenity felt through and through!
Beautifully written!
I do not think this piece is long at all, sometime short and sweet is great but sometimes the length of the longer poem gives the reader more enjoyment on that ride of beauty!
This is the case here for me!
I wish you all the best in the contest!
Jasminerose
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Thank you for the wonderful comment. I'm glad the imagery was there, I really wanted it to paint the picture clearly. From what I've read from these comments it's done just that. I appreciate your read and time!
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I'm glad you could get a sense of what I was saying and that you could feel it too. It always makes me happy to know someone could really get into what I had said and feel it like I had. Thank you for the comment.
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Thanks for the comment, much appreciated. I'm glad you loved it! I try to make my work enjoyable for all.
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Thank you for the wonderful comment. I appreciate it. I'm glad you enjoyed the piece! That was what I wanted =].
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I agree with Angel and Delusions this is a wonderfull peice so full of imagery and grace it's a beautifull expression and a wonderfull way to show your apreciation for the thing you love, it flow's realy well and captures your love for nature perfectly.Well done and thank you sharing such a wonderfull peice of writing.Peace!!
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In my mind's eye, I was lying on my back gazing up at the great canopy of our sky and feeling and thinking all of those things.
Beauty in words. Well done. -
This is an unusual and lovely poem.You paint a wonderful picture of the sky.I agree with you, it is a wonder and yet we take it for granted like most things that are always there.Well done, I loved it, Ros
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this is so wonderful! amazingly beautiful! full of senses, full of beauty..
the way u portrayed the sky.. u just made it perfect, maybe cz it already is.. and ur poem makes the reader realize that!
very very beautiful poem!
the flow is great, the words greater.. what a great tribute i say, to the widest of all..the sky...
full of love.. and sensuality.. the imagery is great!
~rana~
Edited on Sep 30, 3:18 because ''. -
Wow, this really good. I couldn't stop reading, and I don't think it is long at all. More like too short. I just wanted to keep going, but, I guess all good things have to end. I loved it, just like I love everything you write. Although this is my favorite that I have read so far. <3
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