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- - Mirage of your embrace - -

 
When aggrieved with unbearable pain,
Looking around to hold on to someone in vain,
Pushing hard to find a rest of solace;
Clasping at the mirage of your embrace.

Seeking not wealth nor sure of destiny,
Proving myself a miser true, but of our glory;
More to be here for reasons on this heavenly place,
Clasping at the mirage of your embrace.

Crying aloud though I know you have heard,
Seeking penance for all I've done and said,
Praying in solitude for better end of days.
Clasping at the mirage of your embrace.
         Sunny

Author notes

POETRY ROX
Written September 20th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21

  • Sweetangelgrace
    February 22, 2007

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    two thumbs up!

    Sunny dear,


    I wish I could speak
    But you know what I mean
    I wish I was there
    To give you a great big hug!!!
    But since I can't be
    Put your right HAND on your left shoulder
    And your left hand in your right shoulder
    Now squeeze tight
    This is a hug
    From me to you!!!


    Ecxellent write!!!


    GRACY


  • AngelDreamer
    February 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    verry nice poem and verry well written


  • Makaskill
    February 15, 2007
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    Beautifully written

    It's been a while since I've read and made comments to poems on AP and this is the first poem I've read in two-months...It is beautifully written and the portrait gives an idea of what it is about before one even reads the poem...I lloved it...Peace


  • Lionslove silver member
    December 14, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    ....excellent, excellent write!!!!

    perfect...no critique necessary.




  • Ryno
    December 6, 2006

    Edit | Reply

    Sorry...

    If it was any other poem I was reading, I would say, OOH great job!! But since I have the contest in mind, I am going to tell you the 3 reasons you have not entered the Preliminary Finals--

    1) ..The topic is not really situating for this contest
    2) There is a rhyme scheme that doesn't always fit
    3) That word you added to the end interrupted the rhyming.

    Sorry about not making it!
    This is still a great poem!

    -Ryan


  • Puppydog gold member
    October 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    A VERY LOVELY POEM

    We all need to have hope and faith to carry on, this is a truly lovely poem


  • life goes on
    October 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    A really goo, emotional poem, very short yet packed with intense feelings......
    I really like the way you have expressed your emotions.....Keep up the good work!!!

    • sunnystar
      December 15, 2006
      Edit | Reply

      Life truly goes on

      There are ways to live life with a little tears and big smiles hope you have the latter the most of it all your life...

  • unbroken5
    October 21, 2006
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    this is unique, I havent read anything like this in quite a while. So I enjoyed the way you express your thoughts here. Thank you for sharing and keep up the good work.

  • OurxBeginning
    October 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is a very deep write, I loved the repeating of Clasping at the mirage of your embrace It really adds so much more meaning. Short but expresses sorrow and hope too. Nice job, keep it up.

    ~ ~


  • Whispering Mirage
    September 23, 2006
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    Sunnystar, how did I miss this one, have seen your name around AP often... this is beautiful yet that sad touch... I think we all have made a mirage sometime in our lives for someone we really miss, you're done that here... Thank you for the read and sending the link....This also has a lovely spiritual touch to it as well, which I love... you have a beautiful talented heart!

    All the best dear one, have a great night....

    Mirage

  • my-star-is-max
    September 23, 2006
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    simple 3 stanza poem that i think is really sweet and refreshing. loved the last line in each stanza. the repetition added effect to your poem. enjoyed very much . thank you for it. lv kez xxxxx

  • sunnystar
    September 21, 2006
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    hi lilac how are you doing not to be seen online much these days well have a great day and thanks for the comments


  • sunnystar
    September 21, 2006
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    thanks fung


  • sunnystar
    September 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you so much your words are well appreciated, your comments mean a lot to me just as this poem thank you

  • memorymaker
    September 21, 2006
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    very good work, could feel all the emotions while reading it, Good luck in the contest


  • nilav
    September 20, 2006
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    there is so much pain in those few words- the mirage of your embrace and unbearable pain ......ah,this is wonderful.


  • just a dreamer
    September 20, 2006
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    Absolutely beautiful! You are a wonderful poet...this piece really describes an inner battle...so great! Good luck!
    Adam


  • -LilacThOughts- gold member
    September 20, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This brings me to tears...a beautiful write...
    you've expressed an extremely personal and painful subject and state of being and I applaud you for it...I can relate to the word mirage when in context of grief...

    Love you loads ~Lilac~


  • fungshuay24
    September 20, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    this is such a beautiful poem sunny. good luck in the contest. i love this poem.

1 - 21 of 21