Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

The End of One's Rope

LIFELINES

or

THE END OF ONE'S  ROPE

A life line is read from the palm of your hand.
By a gypsy sage at the fortune stand.
But that line's fixed on your Natal Day.
Of far greater worth is the line that you weave
As through the thickets of  life you cleave.
Towards your personal Judgement Day.

This lifeline may be long or short
But it's woven by the deeds you've wrought.
And the course that you've steered through life.
A selfless action or a kindly word
strengthens this chord. or so I've heard.
And hardens it against the Devil's knife.

A thoughtless deed or wounding action
Will weaken your line, fraction by fraction.
Lowering the load it will bear.
A battle twixt the seven sins and graces
Is marked by countless minute traces.
Plainly seen by "Him Up There".

And when at last you cease your toil
And shuffle off this mortal coil.
To your own lifeline you must cling.
But a weakened rope will easily break
So do good deeds for your own soul's sake.
And help the angels to wind you in.

Author notes

This is based on an old Irish belief and was written at a time when I was reading the works of Patrick Macgill, The Navvy Poet
You can find some of his work here.
oldpoetry.com/oauthor/show/Patrick_MacGill

Please let me know which title is the best!
Written September 18th, 2006

In a list

What did you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 25 of 25
  • MagicEyes
    February 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    THIS WAS REALLY GOOD

    • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
      March 10, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you. I am glad you liked this which I feel is one of my better efforts.
      Jim

  • Jadon
    October 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for sending that information on the seven graces. I assumed they, like the sins would be shorter and I did not mean to put a task before you.
    I have been reviewing them and as you said, they are specific and quite interesting. Unlike yourself I had only heard reference before to the seven sins (must be the company I keep!) and was unaware of the countering graces. Thank you for the education on this point.
    Edited on Oct 16, 3:13 p.m. because 'delete repeated word'.

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    October 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Yes I like that one, it was my original choice.
    You ask about the 7 graces. it is a phrase I have heard many times and accepted as a truth. Your question made me search and I find this answer
    Here are the seven graces:
    1. I will grant peace to their families.
    2. They will be enlightened about the divine mysteries.
    3. I will console them in their pains and I will accompany
    them in their work.
    4. I will give them as much as they ask for as long as it does
    not oppose the adorable will of my divine Son or the
    sanctification of their souls.
    5. I will defend them in their spiritual battles with the infernal enemy and I will protect them at every instant of their
    lives.
    6. I will visibly help them at the moment of their death, they
    will see the face of their Mother.
    7. I have obtained (This Grace) from my divine Son, that those
    who propagate this devotion to my tears and dolors, will
    be taken directly from this earthly life to eternal happiness
    since all their sins will be forgiven and my Son and I will
    be their eternal consolation and joy.


    They are a bit more specific than I thought but never-the-less I feel it doesn't negate the meaning within my poem.

    Hope this answers your question.
    Thanks for your interest.
    Jim

  • Jadon
    October 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    thoughtful!

    You asked which title - I liked Lifelines. as the other did not convey to me the message of the integrity of the rope which is integral to your poem. I'd heard of the seven deadly sins. Are there also seven graces?
    I appreciate the thought you give to your poetry and the truth you've incorporated. Sometimes a seemingly awkward line is the very thing to cause the reader to take more care in their reading and thus brings their thoughts back into the intended message.

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 30, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I have decided you were on the right track with this poem and have ammended that awkward line. Thanks for the input.
    Jim

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 30, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for those kind words.
    They reminded me I needed to edit line 11 to the way I recite it now.
    Jim
  • MagicEyes
    September 30, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow this poem was amazzing!!! greeat write i likeeeee thiissss alottttttt your a good writer

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 25, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for those kind words Yvette. Nowadays I find rhymes come naturally to me although some have to be worked at. I do try to ensure that the meaning is paramount and thank you for echoing that.
    Jim
  • Yvette Champ
    September 25, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I rarely rhyme as I find myself searching for a word that fits as opposed to the one that feels natural to me.I have read lot's of rhyming poetry where the same seems to have happened to the author in that some rhyme seems forced,then the mind is taken away from the content and to the format.However,this rhyme flowed,nothing forced here and the joy for me was it wasn't a dah de dah de dah de dah poem just to rhyme til beginning to end but it had depth,meaning,a sagacious voice that was thought provoking and delivered not as a lecture but an invitation.Held the interest of the reader well done
  • montez gold member
    September 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I'd rather have a glass of wine Jimbo!

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 20, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    As given I think it lengthens the line too much but modified to
    Strengthens that vital chord I've heard
    might fit the bill.
    I'll try that out a few times live. Thanks for the offering Robin. You might just have done the trick
    I think that deserves
    Jim
  • montez gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Hi Jim,
    Could I suggest :-

    "A helpful action or a kindly word,
    Adds strength to the vital chord, I've heard"

    Regards,
    Robin.

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your kind comment and continued support.
    Jim

  • lake of whispers
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    very strong messag i liked it a lot, epecially the ending.good job

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Your quotes are valid Gordon but the true strength is to deal in the same way with strangers as well as friends. The traveller from Samaria for example.
    Jim

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I too have heard such tales Liz and feel there may be more to palmistry than my sophisticated side believes in. It is strange.
    However the main theme, when I encountered it in MacGill's writing seemed so obvious and in tune with my own way of thinking that I wanted to express it for myself.
    I tried it on a live audience at a Gospel session at Otley Folk Festival last Sunday and people were stopping me in the street to comment. I felt distinctly chuffed.
    Thank you your continued support and strong comments.
    Jim

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Once again your comments are helpful and to the point Robin I've ammended the obvious ones you gave me but I am unable to adjust the eye rhyme to a true rhyme with word and chord. It is the only thing I dislike about this piece. The weak cling - in I can live with when reciting but even I have difficulty with word - chord but must leave it until I find a way to resolve it and keep the feel of the piece intact.
    Thanks for your forthright comments and please keep visiting.
    Jim
    Edited on Sep 19, 6:18 because ''.
  • montez gold member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    generally very good

    Hi Jim,
    I think in the 3rd verse you meant twixt, not twit!
    And in the last verse, you correctly hyphen soul's, but incorrectly hyphen deeds.
    Also, the half-rhymes word and chord, and cling and in (which aren't as bad as the former) slightly spoil an otherwise excellent piece.
    Your rhythm incidentally is much better here, and the poem generally deserves the clap, so here it is!
    Robin.

  • Gordon silver member
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    very good

    The Value of a Friend

    Ecclesiastes 4
    9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
    10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
    11 Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
    12 And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.


  • funpum
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I have heard that your lifeline on your hand can strengthen or weaken according to how you live your life also - if you believe in this sort of thing. HOWEVER - one of my friends (a most unlikely person ) was taught to read palms. This was well known among her aquaintence, and in a bar one night the friend of a friend asked for a reading. When he showed her his palm, there was a 'shadow' line alongside his lifeline, something which she had never seen before, which gave her an unaccountable feeling of dread. She said she couldn't read his palm with some excuse or other. He died the next day so she has never read palms again in case she sees something to make her worry! Love your poem!

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    There's still time. Every little helps !
    Thanks for reading and commenting.
    Jim

  • purple wings
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    i have burnt for my sins and that seriously made me stop,well drasticly cut down sinning.good write.

  • I-Like-Rhymes gold member
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank You
    Jim

  • Forget Regret
    September 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is a really great poem...well done.
1 - 25 of 25