death, little… death
released inhibitions
Sensuous - fingers roaming
thighs spread wide
Passion creates desire
All consuming fire
shallow breathing
Me underneath him
Wondrous, glorious,
extraordinary
Raging hunger
---- Sex ----
Hunger raging
Extraordinary,
glorious, wondrous
Him underneath me
breathing shallow
Fire consuming all
Desire creates passion
wide spread thighs
roaming fingers - sensuous
released inhibitions
death… little, death
Patricia Gibson-Little
Author notes
I know I got voted off, but what the heck... I did it anyway.
I hope it was good for you!
The challange was to write a poem that could be read forward or backward. (a mirror image) http://www.allpoetry.com/Poem/223140
Written April 21st, 2003
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
I feel that death, little...death and vice versa throws this off just a bit, but other than that this is awesome! Nice flow and lots of tasteful sensuality! Well done
)
-
Ohhh myyy this was intense I was kinda reaching for the death part, very dark, but tis you and that darkness, I do hope as much as I may that it may pass into the light of happiness we all so much deserve, and you are no different in that regard, we all deserves light and happiness, so anywhos this was a tasy write, made me think, and that sometimes is not a good thing
LOL, best of luck if it hasn't already been judged yet,
most sincerely,
joe -
Apart from the opening and ending line, I think this piece is brilliently written with a good show of skill.
The piece is strong and flows very well, (something often missing in a form like this.) -
Thank you for your comments. This challange was very interesting. Everyone should try it.
-
sex...sex...sex...how can you go wrong with sex. it's so natural. it's so normal....it's so nessesary for live to progress onward. this was a wonderful write. your plays on words and the pace in which this was writen was just perfect. this poem needs no changing...i think it's beautiful. keep up the good work...i'm always reading.
lots of love
mojdeh -
I'm curious about the title since this doesn't look like a palindrome. Regardless, it is a good poem, and it looks like you had fun with it...or so I hope. Good work.
-
Excellent
Of all of the ones I have read, I like this one the best. Amazing flow and rhythm. You have outdone yourself. I am so glad you tried the challange. This is true poetry!!! -
WHOA!!!!!!! great one! oh, this is good! Erotic, enticing, and a little bit of naughty thrown in.
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
