thoughts floating and life unknownst.

i contemplate,
i consider,
i think,
i cry.

i have given all i have,
i have lost all i am,
i don't care anymore,
i just try not to die.

i am here for one,
i am equal to none,
i have no point,
i just am.

this is my life,
this is my mind,
this is my thoughts,
until one day i find.

i find nothing,
no mail,
no calls,
no jobs.

i look,
but none is there,
i lost all,
but i gave it free.

i didn't want to,
i wanted myself,
but i could have it,
i couldn't live.

in the trap that is my mind,
i have more problems then i have thoughts,
my mind floats,
my life sinks.

i think more i find more problems,
i look harder i disappoint myself,
i wish i had a real life,
then i could have her.

if i had her still,
she wouldn't be happy,
i have no life,
so i caged her up...

she was mine, and mine alone,
she was trapped, and in my cage,
she was everything, to me and my mind,
but i set her free, to roam, to live...


now i sit here, thinking, writing, looking for answers,
now i sit here, alone, broke, and jobless,
now i sit here, for thoughts to stop, life to cease, or a job,
now i sit here, and i wait for the phone, the mail, or someone.

i lost all my friends,
and i lost myself with them,
i lost all my thoughts,
and i found a light.

i clung, collected, and dragged,
i brought her into my world, my life, my mind,
i couldn't let go, couldn't let her be free, could give her up,
i set her free, still with me, but without boundaries.

i wish i could have her to myself,
but she wasn't happy,
so i set her free,
and now i cant take her back...

i love her to much to cut her from her love of life again.