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Just Another Saturday

Missing image

Upon waking, she felt something wasn't quite right.  She just could not put her finger on it.


Brushing it off she got up and started her Saturday as usual. Showering, dressing, and breakfast.  She was going window shopping. Hating to spend money, but enjoyed walking and looking.


It was a very nice day, so she walked downtown. Her mood had lifted, so she nodded and said hello to those she passed along the way.


At the intersection she waited with a small group of elderly women who were chatting amongst themselves. She smiled at their camaraderie.


When the light changed, they all started across the street, suddenly a kid on a bike flew past them. She was indignant that he was so inconsiderate.


Strolling along the sidewalk at a leisurely pace, she looked in the windows as she passed. Hearing a commotion across the street, she looked at the reflection in the window. She saw two young men pushing each other, and heard them shouting. What she noticed next really astounded her. She placed her hand against the glass. Turning around quickly, she clasped one hand over her mouth as she held the other up and examined it.  Nervously she looked around, then snuck a look back at the reflections in the window.


What is happening? She was trembling. She waved at the glass. Feeling faint, she slid down and sat on the sidewalk. Looking at people passing, she noticed that no one was paying her any attention.


She watched as a dog crossed the street. It stopped halfway across, staring at her. Its hair bristled in spikes along it back. It bared its teeth and growled at her.


She froze in fear. A horn blared breaking the dogs stare, it whined, turned and ran back where it came from. Its tail was laid between its legs.


Confused and terrified, she got up, and ran home. Once inside, she slammed the door and deadbolted it. Leaning her back against it to catch her breath. When she had, she went to her room. Opening the door she screamed. Feeling herself pulled, not in control, she laid down and sunk into herself that was laying dead upon the bed.

Author notes

Written September 11th, 2006

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • dream5111
    February 28, 2007

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    "Confused and terrified, she got up, and ran home. Once inside, she slammed the door and deadbolted it. Leaning her back against it to catch her breath. When she had, she went to her room. Opening the door she screamed. Feeling herself pulled, not in control, she laid down and sunk into herself that was laying dead upon the bed." is my favorite part


  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    September 11, 2006
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    Thanks, I thought a story would be okay for this option. Sorry if it isn't. Please let me know.

  • Jinxgirl
    September 11, 2006
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    this is kind of creepy, and very detailed, but it read more like a story than a poem... very nicely done though, i enjoyed it!

  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    September 11, 2006
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    Thanks Joe, I appreciate it!


  • Paladin Warrior
    September 11, 2006
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    vary nice jeannie, nice write, and you do have an awesome talent


  • DarkHunter
    September 11, 2006
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    Excellent

    This is an awesome piece and that's one hell of an imagination you got there. A creep story with an excellent ending, it was not what I was expecting. You have exceptional talent and wish you all the best in the contest.

1 - 6 of 6