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A Dialogue In Which The Poet Does Not Speak









Speak, Poet
The grave is shallow,
the ground will tremble.
Speak poet,
out of the ashes of your dead Art.

Speak, Poet!

I would see my hot breath
flee through the trees again.

Why do you start so
were you sleeping?

Who is this little trollop
you adore?
This little muse,
this mouse.
Take her out from beneath your robes,
your sweet masque.
Bring her before Me
that I may judge her worth.

Does she rival Atalanta in Calydon?
Is her Beauty rare?
Are there trinkets in her hair?

Do these verses you compose
extol her virtues,
expose her breasts
her ankles
the length of her pale thigh?
Are there jewels in her eyes?

Yes. Bring her Poet.
Speak of Love
like some sick boy.

Is she as constant as Octavia,
as brilliant as Cleopatra?

Does she moan over your pretty words?
Blow you kisses?
show her concern?

Is she real, Poet?

***

My talons are sharp
and merely graze your thin shanks.
Did you not think I was lonely
through these long ages
when you gave to all these mortal little girls?

Did you think to blunt my anger
with empty words,
to turn my wrath away
with some mean philosophy,
to speak of God
as though he were more important than me?
Silly boy.

It was I who laid with you
through the long night
when she proved fickle,
I, who tended to your wounds
when the words were brutal
and dripped from the pen
to the page like knives.

Pay me Poet.
Speak.
Give me your words
that we may love again.

Author notes

Written September 9th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 24 of 24
  • Sj
    August 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The Dread Comment Box
    Reappears. Without Locks
    Just for the sake of Heck,
    Here's some more dreck.

  • Sj
    August 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Dismiss,
    Annoying Comment Box,
    Go away.
    How many dumb remarks
    Are left by those
    Who only want points.
    Dumb


  • SpydurPoet gold member
    October 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm.
    Something fascinating about you.
    Seem to know a lot about historical figures,
    the fascinating ones.
    More than most others on this site.
    Quite interesting...
    Well written.
    Write on.
    ~*~SpydurPoet~*~

  • Mother Angst
    October 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    yipes! id hate to be on the receiving end of this tounge lashing, but it is very well written indeed. i enjoyed it very much.


  • mzladyt
    October 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    In general I don't like these kind of poetry but this one I loved. It wasn't hard to understand and it kept my attention all the way through. Terrific job


  • Paint Me Beautiful
    October 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I like this, especially the last stanza...beautifully done. Thanks for sharing, I will be looking forward to more from you soon.

    ~Amber~


  • xPink-Lotusx
    October 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Very well written. Kind of brings me back in a haze after reading it. I like this piece alot. Very well done, once again.


  • suthrnbell84
    October 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I think everyone else has already said everything I would say. It's wonderful, great, unique, everything. I loved it.


  • Yossarian
    October 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Tyrrants

    Sic semper tyrannus, as the man said. Oft the poet is the dictator of his words (perhaps as it should be), so I really like that you flipped the coin to some degree. I also like the Greek and Roman references (also the quasi-Shakespeare reference, but that's sort of incidental).

    I almost got the impression that this was "Poetry" attacking the Poet. Perhaps that's just me reading into it, but you've created a rather ambiguous narrator. Ambiguity is the poet's best friend, as I always say.

    I really liked this:

    "Does she rival Atalanta in Calydon?
    Is her Beauty rare?
    Are there trinkets in her hair?"

    It's not so much the rhyme, but the fact that the rhyme is there. You use the form to create the tone, rather than the words. That's cool.

    Cheers,

    Yossarian
    Edited on Oct 02, 8:37 p.m. because ''.

  • vanyel
    September 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow u r a wounderfu poet i loved this sooo much it heaps kool anyway good luck in the wwicked contest and keep writtin


  • Cirafly24
    September 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow i adore this..it's so perfect. it evokes images in my mind of a dark room, secrets, hidden answers, shame and pride all at once. i just love the perspective you've written it in, and it brings to mind all the romance, pain, wonder, etc of poetry. ahh i love it!!


  • unheardwisdom
    September 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This was a good piece of poetry. Great job.


  • Amicus2K9
    September 13, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is a poets poem, through and through...I have not seen Atalanta in Calydon in written words since my college days, oh so long ago.

    Wonderful pent up anger restrained and then loosed, marvelous work!

    amicus....



  • passionvine
    September 13, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Dialogue Deft and Poetic -- you must write pl

    So Success is not the only Bitch Goddess?

    Brilliant as always -- "think shanks" always takes me to Beckett.

    She's a little hard on the poor poet; perhaps the reason for his stillness. As Jonson put it: "Calumnies are answered best with silence."

    Yes yes on the "hot breath" which also invokes for me the mirror held up to the poet's still mouth -- is there vapor? does He breathe? is He as dead as the shallow grave and ashes?

    Me likes and as always am respectfully in awe of your ability to keenly hear the Voice from the vortex.


    The minds eye fills in the "more," but I'm uncertain if the omission is deliberate ambiguity (more or less can both be implied) or your own mind's eye at work.

    "to speak of God as though he were important than me?"


    Peace.


  • Desiree Darkk
    September 13, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    A comment in which the critter does not speak ...

    Not really. Like this line here:

    to speak of God as though he were important than me? Important to me?

    I usually blast a poem that asks so many questions because it makes for too many abstractions and loses me but you do that Lutie thing here and pull it off nicely.

    "Is she real, Poet?"

    The answer is nopeys. Or maybe.

    Anyway I sort of like the blunt ending though it somehow makes me feel as if I've just been scolded.

    Desiree


  • Gregor Samsa
    September 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    One of the best things I've read here for some time.


  • plinkyponk
    September 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    i never noticed the mistakes i just fell into the poem. it was lovely . see you mentioned breasts. why dont you do a poem on breasts and get them off your chest otherwise breasts could give you a mental blockage. you're good at this writing milarkey arent you x
    Edited on Sep 11, 6:56 because 'misspelt breats'.


  • -Incarcerated Soul-
    September 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Magnificent

    Indeed whats left to say. All words have been stolen by comments already made, all criticism said. All I can add is that I was totally lost in your words as this poem flowed from beginning to end..so mythical, beautiful yet with such an edge. You are talented and I hope you write more wonderful poems as good as this. Take care


  • Mythtress
    September 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Reminds me of a poem Auden wrote of Yeats after his death: "Earth recieve an honored guest, William Yeats is laid to rest, Let the Irish vessel lie empty of its poetry." I loved this poem of yours...it is well written, beautifully worded, and ponders the aftermath of a poet's passing. Well done. Write on, poet.
    Edited on Sep 10, 9:19 because 'typo'.


  • Ariosto II. gold member
    September 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    damn Lute, what's left to say...maybe after you make all those changes, I'll be back.
    In the meantime, I've put this one to music and will be humming it all day.

    memorable another words

    like it

    D

  • Miss Yorik
    September 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    "out of the ashes of your dead Art."

    Ashes already implies "dead", so do you need that second word? Just wondering... kinda makes it wordy.

    "Does she rival Atalanta in Calydon?"

    Atalanta or Atlanta?

    "Is her Beauty rare?
    Are there trinkets in her hair?"

    A pleasant and unexpected little piece of rhyme - lovely!

    "Is she real, Poet?"

    Ahh, the question we all poets ask ourselves at one point or another... or perhaps someone asks us and we either drive on to prove the muse is real or shy away. I like how you inserted this direct question in the middle, between questions that attack the poet, yet are not so blunt. This is a good punch.

    "Did you think to blunt my anger
    with empty words,
    to turn my wrath away
    with some mean philosophy,
    to speak of God as though he were important than me?
    Silly boy."

    Here, it came to mind as if the narrator were some god from the Greek myths, demanding attention and love from the poet, making it well-known that he was ruler and in charge of the poet's whole existence. Btw, you're missing the word "more" in this line:

    "to speak of God as though he were (MORE) important than me?"


    "It was I who laid with you
    through the long night
    when she proved fickle,"

    I think a semi-colon would do better at the end of this rather than a comma, since you start a new thought in the next line.

    The ending is strong and direct, but somehow it doesn't satisfy me... It's too blunt for my taste, especially the "pay me." I immediately associate it with the modern world of money and business, which is perhaps one of your motives, but the rest of the poem is so eloquent and tending toward the historical/mythological side, that it would be more interesting if you reworded this part. For example, you could use the word "owe" or "debt", i.e. your debt to me has reached its limit. Speak." etc. Just a suggestion. Feel free to ignore.

    Hope you don't mind the critical review. I like your poem very much - it's very wholesome and orignal.


  • sock monkey
    September 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I like this. It's got a nice quality, sort of mythic. And the little muse... Hidden away... While your tone is angry and sad. Good job.

  • She Stole My Voice
    September 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Why does this keep happening to me?! Everytime I want to say something about a piece of work, someone already stole the words out of my mouth! lol I agree with cvillelisa all the way. This is just a beautiful piece. Keep up the killer work and take care

    ~ImmortalUndead~


  • cvillelisa
    September 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply


    Just beautifully sad. And even shivery, like a north wind that blows unexpectedly chilly despite sitting in all the warm sun in September.

    You have captured, for me, that feeling of near enslavement -- the unstoppable need to create, the it is never good enough. She wants more, more, more blood. The taunting. The almost theres. Yup. This a bit Charles Baudelairey.

    Well that and all that pretty stuff in there too. I nearly hate when you do that. Make it pretty and dreadful at the same time. It is that seam - that light / dark meets place, the sublime.

    You (and probably everyone else who reads you) know I love your poems. This one and Rappallo Revisited are just really reaching, or as Zara has used lately, leaping kind of things. Whatever you are doing -- do more.

    Bookmarked.

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