Blood is boiling
in a black pot of rage-
Sirens scream
I feel i'm going insane.
I'm gonna-
break a coffee cup.
I wanna-
smash the floorboards up.
Inferno burns
flames blaze a trail 'cross the page-
steam valve snaps
fear rips its way through my brain.
I'm gonna-
break an old tea cup.
I wanna-
smash the floorboards up!
Author notes
Option 4. Written September 9th, 2006
A contest entry
- Passionate Poetry by Last Pixie.
300 points, ended June 12, 2007, 26 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rock and Roll Poetry by positive anarchy.
700 points, ended May 24, 2007, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Put your name to good use - for a lot of points. by Celtess.
1250 points, ended June 20, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anger, Rage, and Wrath by she still smiles x.
1035 points, ended July 9, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me a song inspired poem! or pick a song title. by TwiztidMaggot.
600 points, ended September 19, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rock On. Music Is What Drives Us. by PolkaDot.
600 points, ended October 8, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Frustrating Anger by torieshawesum.
800 points, ended October 29, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - give me something with intensity by Kumgang.
300 points, ended January 10, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Define Yourself by Nighttime angel.
670 points, ended January 22, 2008, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Random Option Contest by GypsyEyes.
375 points, ended February 6, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Get Mad by RunningFree.
525 points, ended March 10, 2008, 17 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Insanity-no rules just write by catalyst..
315 points, ended September 11, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Angry Anyone?? by A-Daisy-Among-Roses.
900 points, ended December 6, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - One Day Contest by aslanlight.
500 points, ended November 23, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Insanity by Insane-Joe.
700 points, ended December 2, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Angry?!! Show me just how angry you are... by starving-to-survive.
1250 points, ended January 25, 89 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 49 of 49
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This was really great to read, the poem flowed beautifully and the emotion was very raw.
You can feel the anger you have just by imagining someone breaking things and smashing the floorboards up, it's very powerful, I love it
x x x -
wow!!! this is great! so much emotion in your words. Your anger is portrayed amazingly. Thank you for entering my contest. this is exactly what i was looking for
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Good write here
Often when we let our feelings rage without venting at times they build and build and often when they are released they are released on one that is not the cause of this fury . Let it out and get problems solved right away for often we wait far too long and in holding this hate within it hanges us to be like the ones we hate
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Thankyou! You've made me laugh when I was being all serious. Sometimes I want to tread on the head of a worm that's poking it's head up for breakfast in the morning sunshine!!! God forbid!
Peace Georgia
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This is great. Its simple but it expresses emotion really well in a different way.
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I love the rhyme in this.
I'm gonna-
break a coffee cup.
I wanna-
smash the floorboards up.
great job
-
I Feel It
As I read this, I can feel the anger rising to take over and come out physically. The emotion just pours out of the words. Thank you for entering my contest and congrats! -
i believe you have given such great emotion in this piece! i too write a lot about anger and i feel very connected to your poem! congrats on all your trophies! thank you for entering and good luck!
NineTailedFox -
A powerful piece, great write. Good luck in the contest with it
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this is pretty cool, lots of raw anger, i like that, but i think you should put more feeling into it.
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this is great mr. floor.
a simple anger, with a direction.
Knowing just where youre blowing
Getting to where you should be going.
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Aw, sorry. A Paul Weller song, "From the floorboards up".
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What was your musical inspiration for this write? Just lemme know
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very interesting... I like ti tho. lol. you did a good job. congrats on your trophies. keep up your great work! good luck in my contest!
Crimson -
Lush. thanks for sharing. Lots of great imagery here. Lots of anger and intensity. Thanks for entering my contest xox
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Hmm could've been more into it with the idea and the passionate emotion your trying to display, instead of simply stating your angry by smashing things and the rage in your mind; but loved the beginning descriptions and the parody. Good work, thanks for the entry.
Ryan -
very good indeed, such power to the piece, your imagery is vivid and very good. congrats on the bronze; it was well deserved
lucy
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Ah, this is a good poem. I really understand the infernal rage-me, with my anger managment issues. But back to the poem.
Great beat and rhyme. Like a rapid succession of bullets, the words seem to spit off the page in pure fury. And the coffe cup/old tea cup references?
Wonderful. I've actually broken cups before. You've embondied all this emotion in such a small poem.
I applaud you! Good job!
~Hippie
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great,
i love this piece.
reminds me of how i feel about my "STEP mother in-law" at times lol
thankyou for entering my contest & good luck =]
♥ jade
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oooooooooooooooooo........i love it!!! the words rhyme so well. it could be a rock song. the words just flow. its great. congrats!
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PHENOMINAL FLOW
first and foremost. this feels origional and i am very glad i peeked in to read it.
Inferno burns-
flames blaze a trail 'cross the page;
steam valve snaps,
i dont quite know how to say this any other way, but you just rocked my house. steam valve snaps is just.. a great useage of words and even better imagry.
jeeze.. so not joining now. good luck.
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Amazing
Very different, I love it! The words flowed freely, and it expresses such emotion, I truly enjoyed it.
Powerful!
Good luck in the contest
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wowza Brosef, how did I miss this lil steamy one? Wooohoo, good job! Good luck!
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I sometimes do break things...it's like a release. Or I go outside and chop wood or break tree limbs. I like the boiling inside sense I get from your poem...almost boiling over. thanks for the entry.
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Sometimes I get so mad that I could spit...but I don't ... My mom used to throw whatever was near her when she was angry. I found it frightening - besides that it only makes for more work to clean it up.
This poem reads with a sense of reality. The tone brought back that hidden memory. Good job! Good luck in the contest.
-
For some reason, I could hear some very heavy, very dark metal playing in my mind as I read this. Maybe something with an industrial sound. It sets a great atmosphere with the start-and-stop, the dashes in specific places, and the sudden line endings. Kick-ass poem, friend.
The only grammatical error I noticed was very minor.
Original line:
"fear rips it's way thru' my brain."
Edited to:
"fear rips its way thru' my brain."
Do me a favor when you can--and toss the number of the option you used into your Author's Notes.
Thanks for entering my contest, and best of luck! -
thank you very much my friend,
alex
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thanks a lot for commenting,
floorboards. -
I love the way this rhymes just right and flows together. Thanks for entering.
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This poem is intense. I can feel your passion. Well done indeed.
Incredibly captivating.
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thanks a lot, it's meant to be about getting mad and wanting to smash the house up but stopping short off actually doing it, it's about restraint.
floorboards. -
Been there, done that, felt the same way once upon a time. Still do sometimes. I broke a window when I was a teenager. lol those were the days.
Your poem is full of tension and anger. I was waiting for a resolve, though, because you started from wanting to break a coffee cup, next it was just an old teacup, and then I expected it to be a junky mug or something. In the end, I thought you would twist it around and say something like, "life's not so bad after all. I just hate the moody times." But in any case, your poem is strong and gripping. Thanks for sharing.
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well Im keeping out of your way.... Great poem. I think we all get like that sometimes. If you ever come to tea I will be sure not to use the good china
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A fine place to leave my 1st applause of the
WithI'm in a foul mood and everything is going wrong I am tempted to punch the door, stomp on the floor, and blow the rood offf of me house BUT being a middle aged fellow of love and peace - i just close my eyes and go to sleep and dream of all of the lovely ladies on AP who are smitten with me! He! He! That is safer and far more stimulating for my heart and more! LOL!!! SMASHING THE FLOORBOARDS UP could leave you with unsteady ground to walk on or open a door to Hell - if you know what I mean! All kidding aside - I am happy that you featured this melodic piece that read like a song, MR FLOORBOARDS for sadly I would have probably missed it today!
Remember -
Peace & Love is the way to go, Bro!
Earl. -
a creatively individual piece of poetry which you have penned here, a nice rhythm and flow cruises through the poem, an enjoyable read. spill ink and twist me into the crazy shape of love...
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thanks a lot for commenting,
alex. -
Wow some intense anger in this poem. If that was your intent then you didi a very good job of it!!
BrokenAngel -
great write
very descriptive! i think everyone can relate to these feeling s of outrage. when i get like this i try to go and be by myself and pray. that way, i dont have a big mes to clean up later!
this poem is very good. i can sense the desperation beyond the words. great write! -
thank you very much,
floorboards. -
cheers, thanks a lot,
floorboards. -
this was an intense short piece...It had the feeling of a great rock song. I hope you expand upon what you have started here.
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fury is a fertile subject to write about...at least for me. there is so much of it. the second stanza grabbed me the hardest. high anger feels like insanity and probably is.
great write. -
thanks a lot!
floorboards. -
WELL DONE!!!
Awesome...very aptly describes the way u feel when things go wrong...very intense yet beautiful...Way to go!!! -
thank you very much preeti!
much appreciated,
alex
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BRAVO!
What an intense write alex...I can actually feel the power of ur emotions..ur writes are always so full of them that one can enjoy the intense nature of the poem! Its a long time I have read ur poems but I finally decided to take time to comment on my favs poems! I am really impressed by this poem! The title itself shows ur rage..This is astounding! KEEP IT UP ALEX!
PREETI
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Excellent
Alex, this is a very powerful and intense Poem you have written here. I often find AP as a great tool to help in relieving stress and anger, through words. Keep up the great work and keep smiling
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Cheers
Terry -
cheers my friend! that was quick!
alex
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This is a very good write Alex that you had penned here my dear friend keep it flowing
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