Orange glow of an old street-lamp-
shadows creeping 'cross the street;
disappearing on the corner,
sending me around the bend.
Golden flame of a bright candle-
dancing lights reflect my mood;
translucent on the outside,
fading fast at midnights' call.
Morning's sun through flowered curtains-
flaxen rays on cold damp walls;
aim a beam on my black circles,
give me strength to carry on.
Did you hear those distant footsteps?
is that laughter in my head?
feels like i'm sinking deeper,
into a brutal whirlpools end.
Author notes
madness.
Written September 2nd, 2006
A contest entry
- Give me your favorite poem you've ever written by Cherry Hades.
300 points, ended November 14, 2006, 23 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter Anything And Everything You want ! Win loads of points , HMs and much more !! (prewrites allowed )(a truthwriter's contest )( more than 326entries ) by sweethelper.
300 points, ended March 10, 2007, 140 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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great write ! i loved it !! it is getting my attention a lot !!
i wish u the very best in the contest !
yours,
truthwrite -
I loved this. I think I may have another favorite.
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very good
thank you for sharing this very good write with us but it is a contest for fun poetry ha ha this is great but rather dark and seriouse (but very good)
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Thank you very much for entering your poem into my contest, your talent and hard work are very much appreciated. This poem was vividly detailed, the imagery was simply astonishing. I am simply in love with words and you used them to express your point with precision and a unique idea of what you wanted that point to express. I loved it and hope you do well in this contest. Great job, and good luck.
Tiphanie -
very powerful piece, my friend. i think it is the first dark poem of yours i come across and i like it a lot. I like the use of light as a cohesive element in the poem's stucture, and it has of course it's similes and metaphors....
hope to read more on the next round.
best,
rachel -
I liked the second stanza in this a lot it spoke more to me of madness and pain then the rest... but that's just me
Thanks for entering
Faerie
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Great immagery, and I can feel the sadness like a lost soul in the world. Thanks for entering
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fantastic
deep thinking
the words in you
no body can explain exept you -
thanks it's about madness.
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I am sorry for this comment but I really didnt get it. I liked the flow to it, but it was to me like listening to a song in a forieng language lol. Thank you for entering. If you could before I judge the contest please IM me with an explanation of what you were thinking exactly when you wrote this poem so I can understand it better. Thank you again though and best of luck to you!
Your host,
~Kate~
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Hauntin and dark poetent and powerful. I enjoyed this immensley your words are powerful and come through brilliantly. Well done indeed.
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hmm I liked it...liked it a lot...great choice of words, and excellent depiction of the scene...I really felt like I was there...almost...and the flow went very well, and over all I think this is an impressive piece...good luck inthe contest!!!
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you are so good at dark and deslolate that I really think you should get out more
Good luck in the contest
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feels dark and isolated, like most of the stuff i've read this morning, unless it's just me. nice job Alex. Jan
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Very good
Very deep and dark poem. It has left me feeling quite sad from the intense, yet subtle, display of emotion here. Very well written.
Dimitri
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