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A Look At The Clock

I was lost beneath your faerie laughter,
trapped so happily in that never-land.

Between the dilapidated bodies,
I could taste heaven,
and was satisfied.

I was sleep walking,
I was dreaming,
I was happy,
I was blind.

My sunglasses had wrapped their
spindly arms
around my face
in a
desperate
attempt
to hide me,


but your laughter’s waning magic
couldn't shut my eyes

I couldn’t forget and I couldn’t ignore
the ardent murmurs of time and truth,


dark hands attempted to wrench me from my untroubled innocence,
my happy unbelieving,


those dark fingers whispered tendrils of waking truth


signing reality to my deaf dumb life.




DancingRed. 310806

Author notes

(Of course) the sleeping in this poem isn’t really sleeping, merely day dreaming, having too much fun and forgetting about time. I do not think this is a poem you can just skim read.

Please comment, it's an entry for the contest 'Become Who You Are [contest # 11]' by PerfectImperfection.

For Jenna: Hah! I used the word 'dilapidated'
Written August 31st, 2006

In a list

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • DancingRed
    October 5, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you!


  • individuality gold member
    September 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    sometimes i think it is a good idea to forget about time, we give time too much importance i reckon, and daydreaming is good, shows a healthy imagination

  • DancingRed
    September 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Why thank you m'dear. Much love to you too!

  • DancingRed
    September 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for the comment I wish you lots of fun with your contest!

  • kalsarlia
    September 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    "For Jenna: Hah! I used the word 'dilapidated' "

    I was going to mention that before I even read your artist's comment!
    Absolutely love the feeling and imagery given on by that little section about the sunglasses. Loverly personification.

    Much Love,
    -the Canary


  • PerfectImperfection
    September 1, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I am enamored in the grasp of time...
    I really enjoyed this piece. Such a heightened sense of imagery, allowing for a better glimpse of how time can slip away - devouring us in it's passing. Thanks so much for entering!

  • DancingRed
    September 1, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Many thanks for the applause and lovely comment!


  • miss midnight
    August 31, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow. great job as always.
    i really like the line:
    "but your laughter’s waning magic
    couldn't shut my eyes."

    very nice.

1 - 9 of 9