“Did you find a church that would
let you do anything you wanted?” she jabs
I sigh.
What is there left to say mom?
How do I tell you that the God of your church is
just too much like you?
He watches me with critical eyes
Pen in hand, he records every deed
Good and bad.
Does he take pleasure in my failure?
Does he nod to himself knowingly
Just like you?
I pursue the God who
reaches to me with arms of love,
and tells me that I am enough.
Even when I make a mistake,
He see’s my heart.
I pursue the God who
smiles and says
“Come to Me and hear My words
keep Me in your heart,
as you are in Mine.”
Not because He stands to condemn,
But because He wants my happiness!
His gifts to me are beautiful;
without a price tag,
without the laundry list of guilt to bear.
I worship Him out of love
not duty
j o y.
You look at me with critical eyes
You and your God are so disappointed.
Can't you see the change in me?
Author notes
Freshly edited. Wohoo! (August 28th 2008)
Written August 27th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
1 - 34 of 34
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Nice representation of valid points and questions. A suggestion:
Why not worship the words that flow from pens in their own form,
and the light that streams from every beaming luminary?
Look deep and you may see what I'm saying. All life comes from light(literally) and all communication flows from life. This requires no faith, only, as I see it, eyes and ears. The universe nurtures us all, births us all, pains us all, and ultimately returns us all to her breast.
"The meshes of the universe are wide
yet nothing slips through"
-From the Tao Te Ching of Lao Tzu
I haver, after all never seen a pricetag on a deer in the wild or a head of grain in the field. Nature, or "God" if you prefer, does not charge but in time and experience. It is man who invented pricetags.
Thanks for this thought provoking poem. Good luck in your seeking. -
Great
I so very agree with this piece...I have a collection called "Dear To Whomever REALLY Is In Charge" a bit of sarcasm to the writes...you've done a great job here. I am on a journey myself...the best of luck to you in the future.
Kari -
I know it can be hard to take a serious look at your religion, especially if you want to separate from those who love you. Your children only compound the problem, because then it becomes more than just an individual spiritual matter. Search your soul, and accept what it tells you. Regrets and angst come from going against what feels natural. A true problem, faced by many and answered by oh so few (and they're probably wrong too!)
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divine
i am glad that you wrote from the heart and what you believe in without and fear, inhibitions or reservations. the holy ghost is the one to conduct the church and God loves us no matter what. i sincerely believe in a want that you have to be free from bonds of traditions and common beliefs because they are man made..
thanks for sharing your beliefs -
I would highly recomend that you try either the baptist church or the united methodist church. But anyways, this was still a good rant, as rants go, and worth an applause, if I had any to give. This is pretty good. But yeah, the baptist and united methodist churches are pretty good. You should try them if you haven't already. Anyways, keep it up!
Dan -
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Rant away darling...it is good for us to do so sometimes
I feel for you and I hope you make a decision that will make you and your children happy
Everyone is entitled to their opinions and choice of religion
Stay safe
~Amanda -
excellent
I really had to think about this., but the thought finally made it through my very complex Stop me if I keep on clapping on your effort. Good write. You are a blazing talent.
Keep up the terrific work.. . ... Did you read anything from me on this site?
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The trouble is that people get all worked up in their beliefs. It is not their job to convert those who believe differently. This can be especially problematic with Christians. Face it: Jesus was a Jew. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that any specific religion is the only way, but it does say that the Jews are the chosen ones. I'm not saying that Judaism is the only way nor is Catholicism nor Baptists nor any of them. I will say, that according to Jesus himself, "Judge not..."
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Faith is so personal and i think this is a wonderful poem! You've really captured the essence of faith; questioning, comparing and being honest in feeling let down by your parent and god.
I think until you are truly happy with yourself from the inside out, no god from any denomination can make a difference. I think religion should be your back up, give you strength, but you can't expect it to guide you and show you the way...That you have to find for yourself and it can only come from within.
Good luck. i hope you find what you are looking for.
XXX -
Faith and religion are part of your heart and soul, not what someone else thinks is right. I believe that as long as one has some kind of faith, they should be proud, and hold onto it. I know first hand of religious bashing. Being Wiccan has it's downfalls, but I know in my heart that it is the right thing for me. You choose the right thing for you. Merry Part and Blessed Be.
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I definately agree with this. I hate how poeple associate agnostic with athiest. I wish you the best ofluck on your quest for God.
<3torie -
you did a good job with this one. I liked
the flow and hearing your views, even though
they differ from a parents. good job. -
His gifts to me are beautiful
Without a price tag
Without the laundry list of guilt to bare.
I worship Him out of love
not duty
but love and joy
at the change in my heart.
So universal and so sacred travel of the muse here.. thought provoking words indeed...
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I'd agree with you---this is more a rant than a poem, that is, at least in it's current form. But don't sell yourself, there's a great deal of potential here. You've got a great title, a situation that easily lends itself to metaphor, and in fact, you already (to a small extent) delved into what could be a workable image for the god being forced upon you, the great note-taker, ready to call you to task for your mistakes.
Don't give up on this one. Sit on it a few weeks, take it back out and see how you can tighten it. You've already got a great story, it's just waiting to be transcribed into poetry.
RH -
I like it, and can relate...I think it was good not to mention any specific religions that way the point was not lost on the judgment....really nice work,
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Sounds like you and your mom need to come to an agreement to disagree on this subject. Let her think you are gonna go to hell and do what you want to. Hey if we aren't here to piss off our parents then I guess I am screwed. What am I gonna do for fun now! Anyway, great rant poem. I like rants the best cause they are so full of real emotion.
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hey TERRIFFIC write. I loved it alot. The religion thing is so true and I'm an orthadox so if it's true it's good. great peice
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Oh by the way I absolutely love the background but I could never use it and I've never seen anyone use it. < 3
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YAY! I have the pleasure no no.. the honor of commenting your poem right after my dear throwing the rocks! < 3 I feel blessed.
OH GOD! This poem is STRAIGHT down my alley. Of course I have a more atheistic (is that a word?) view on religion and Christianity. I have a deep respect for people who can find love in God and yearn for it. So I absolutely loved this poem. And it's such a common topic that many of us feel ( not me but anyways) so it's nice to see that other people go through the same thing. And getting out of religion to a different one or to nothing at all is like getting out of a gang. My entire family fuckin FREAKED when I said I was an atheist of sorts. It's like saying I was Satanic or something I don't know. I didn't think it was a big deal since usually I challenge other people's beliefs and prove them wrong and such in real life before I ever said I was atheist. So they should of saw it coming. Oh my! I just kept ranting. Sorry! Anyways, it's nice I like it and I'll stop now.
P.S. Hehehe I did three f words.
Much love,
Thorn -
The power of religion is so confusing and such a personal opinion that it isn't fair for your mother to be forcing hers onto you. That's part of religion that I find annoying. When someone truly belives that their path is right that it's almost intimidating when they tell you yours is wrong, especially if your grasp on your own path isn't as tight.
I like this poem, it's sense of reality and understanding. You explain your point well, including what you think about God and what it means to you.
<3, Tori. -
There was a great flow and an overall optimism in this piece. Being an old fart myself I did pick up a hint of hypocrisy. Mom gets to feel and believe what she feels is best also. I hope you have had this discussion and the the doors of open and honest communication were thrown wide open. We all can want god to be something but he she or it is what it is. Apparently your god wants you to consider yours and your mothers views and relationship with their higher power. That would be the godly thing to do. Thanks for the thoughts and words.
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This is fantastic,and I wish you the very best of luck in your spiritual quest. Pay no attention to what other people say, just do what you feel is right for you and your children. I'm not religous at all, I just think that as long as you are a good person and try to do the right thing you're in the right direction.
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Very poetic rant. Don't listen to that rubbish, believe what you want to believe! Nobody should belong to a religion they don't even believe!
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im glad that somebody knows how i feel.
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I don't believe that God is watching over us with pen in hand
Counting up our sins an a poetic rant, I believe that god is how ever yearning for as as we should him, And that who ever sees god as a image of bearing down on us with a rod will soon fill that rod,, Anyways this is a very powerful write, awsome
Thank you for allowing me to read and comment on your work/ -
Wow, well I can tell you that no matter where you worship God will love you as long as you choose to believe in him. If you believe that Jesus was sent as our saviour and died on the cross to save us from our sins and that if we repent and own up to all our mistakes or sins in life then we will eternally be accepted. No matter what *church* you go to, God will always love you. He gave us the power of choice and your mom being against you exploring other churches just shows you how close-minded she has become. You should worship where you feel comfortable and welcomed not some place that continually is all about constantly bringing up mistakes. We all make mistakes in life because we're human. I hope that you do find a church where you can worship God comfortably and as you described in your poem. This is beautifully written and it's great to see that you have the heart to write something like this and put it out on the table.
Blessings,Tom -
hey that was an amazing piece. and i can see where you are cmming from.if you dont mind me asking, what church/faith does your mum belong to?
I am a christian, and the God I know and serve is the God who "Smiles and says
Come to me and hear my words
keep Me in your heart,
as you are in Mine."
I'd love to have a discussion about this with you
if you've got any questions or whatever, IM me
Great piece, very emotional and heartfelt too btw.
NMNM
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Thank you Pancho, it is nice to be understood.
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Wow, very powerful poem....and even if it was a rant, it turned out really well! haha...I can understand where you're coming from with the religion thing, though....we shouldn't worship out of fear, but out of love. Great write!
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that's good.
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Thank you duckie, I think I did.
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BrokenAngel,
I'm so glad you liked it. A peice like what?
Sarah -
this is very good, i hope you find it. love, Duckie.
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THANKYOU. it is about time does a piece like this thankyou!
Broken
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