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When I Die...

When I Die...

I wish to take a Genie,
Who would not be a meany.

He would obey my order,
And save me from the border.

Heaven will be his lamp,
We both will have a camp!

Hell would be his enemy's house,
He would live there with his spouse.

God would bless us with raining petals,
And our enemy with hard metal.

Author notes

Well.. After the contest got over.. I thought to extend this poem a little bit!
Written August 27th, 2006

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • nobodys-girl
    December 26, 2008

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    this is so good! i absolutly loved reading it! thank you so much for entering my contest and best of luck!


  • CherylAnn
    December 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Awsome Write

    LOVED IT,LOVED IT,LOVED IT...The flow was awesome,the rhymeing was great.Had a perfect rythm...A very good write...Also got a little chuckle in the deal...
    God Bless and have a Blessed Day..
    Good Luck in the Contest..

  • star wars fanatic
    December 2, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    nice job

    This is very creative of you. Nice work here.


  • October 21, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    I LOVEEEEEEE IT! =]

    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THIS PIECE OF YOURS... A GENIE....... HOW SWEEEEEET!!!!!!!!!! I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hmmm... well, excitement stops! This is damn good yaar! I loveee this lines-

    Heaven will be his lamp,
    We both will have a camp!

    &

    God would bless us with raining petals,
    And our enemy with hard metal.

    GOD bless you girl... and always remember.. I LOVEEE YOU!


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    October 15, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful poem from a wonderfual grandaughter. I love it And yout rhyming is getting so very good
    Gaylene


  • Keith Drew gold member
    August 31, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    God would bless us with raining petals,I love that line,it shows me that your heart is a beautiful one. Little bird in a tree of love.

  • phoenixonfire
    August 30, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    AW! That is even sweeter..I like the cute nature of the poem! A really relaxing write from u ..its so different..I hope u get the genie and the wishes..good luck on that!
    ~~~PREETI~~~


  • nichtmich silver member
    August 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Adorable

    Adorable I like the message in this one Wouldn't it be nice to never have to cross that border? You are on the right track. Keep penning, Poetess!


  • mysticstorm gold member
    August 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is very good and so sweet. Very creative and cute. I guess there would not be many better things to take than a genie.
    Wonderful job! Keep up the good work.

  • phoenixonfire
    August 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    cute

    loL! Poetry princess....that is so sweet and cute poem u have penned..u want a genie who obeys ur orders..well the little girl shall have it! I really like this one..it brought a smile to my face shamail..thanks for entering and good luck...
    ~~~PREETI~~~


  • bubbasamuel
    August 27, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow this is so cute. it really made me smile. so tender so innocent and heart warming. its also got a slight humorous touch to it. you did a great job with this and i sm sure your poem is going to stand oput from the rest in this contest. you really had an unusual and creative thought in this one. i really enjoyed reading this. keep penning pretty princess.

1 - 12 of 12