Tender hands, so soft, so gentle,
Cradled in my calloused palms.
A simple touch is all thats needed,
And the beast within she calms.
Pretty head, so dear, so precious,
Nestled on my naked chest.
A peaceful smile while she is sleeping,
And she puts my heart to rest.
Sunshine smile, so warm, so joyful,
Captured in my tired eyes.
One look from her that says 'I love you'
And peace within my soul lies.
Author notes
I wrote this poem through the eyes of a man who is talking about the love of his life. When my mother read it, however, she told me she saw it through the eyes of a mother talking about her child. What do you see?
Written August 14th, 2002
Darianna
A contest entry
- ♠ My First AP poem ♠ by Rebekah-Ann.
525 points, ended May 20, 25 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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OH I loved this! Thank you for you beautiful entry!
All the best in the contest!
Becks -
I had three boys, then a girl. She calmed my soul, and this reminds me...
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keep it up
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Sunshine smile, so warm, so joyful,
Captured in my tired eyes.
One look from her that says 'I love you'
And peace within my soul lies.
my fav part but the resty of the poem was amazing 2 -
great poem lots of love present very feeling charelia
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Awww so sweet
It sounds like the mother talking to her daughter, or thinking about her anyway.. all that breast going on and all
Not sure about the last line.. something about it seems to not fit... I wish I could give a suggestion... but I am brain dead right now
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I instantly thought about my daughter, the feelings expressed here are similar to what I feel when I am rocking my daughter so sleep. That is our little special time, I give her a bottle and rock her and sing her to sleep. But now she is getting older (17 months) so she doesn't want to be held as often
Anyway, beautiful poem here. I can see it both ways.
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I also see it from a mothers point of view. I am suspecting that most mothers will see it this way.
This was so very touching either way.
After I read your Author comment, I re-read the poem. I can see both sides , but maternally I am drawn to this as a mother/child side.
This is very beautiful,
Thank you for sharing this briiliant write. -
Both. Good sweet write.
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IT was all three! It was a father and daughter in the first stanza.
Tender hands, so soft, so gentle,
Cradled in my calloused palms.
A simple touch is all thats needed,
And the beast within she calms.
children have been known to calm even the wildest of tempers, and turn people into calm people. The calloused palm for me, represents a father...
But then again... that's only the first stanza!
In the next stanza, it switched to mother and child.
Pretty head, so dear, so precious,
Nestled on my naked chest.
A peaceful smile while she is sleeping,
And she puts my heart to rest.
right?
And in the third stanza:
Sunshine smile, so warm, so joyful,
Captured in my tired eyes.
One look from her that says 'I love you'
And peace within my soul lies.
I feel the love from a man to a wife.
Beautiful all around.
MMP
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The gentle flower of passion bloom,
Before me in this silent room,
The very soul within me keeps,
Her precious being, as she sleeps,
So closely I become a part,
Of her very beating heart.
My soul looks out from new born eyes,
On where my every treasure lies..........Definately, a man talking to a women.
excellant poem.
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i like it!
Lovely poem. I wuold have to see it from your point of view - a mother would probably not be referring to "the beast within". Very nice and peaceful. Good write!
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I did not even think of it that way! Thankyou whimsical for that insight...Darianna x
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I saw both in your poem, the mother with child, the love of a man for his love, and also a father with daughter.. it portrays all three quite clearly to me.
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beautiful
This was a beautiful poem, and I think that people will look at it as either a mother and child, or lovers depending on where they are in their lives. Many young people don't consider children, so don't know what having the love of them is, whereas many older people would know how much love can be given by a child towards its parents, as well as knowing how to calm the beast within. -
Wow at first I actually thought this was about a baby. Well done, I have done this occasionally myself. Beautiful little poem.
Red -
This is better from you.
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What a beautiful poem... the words such as tender, soft, gentle, cradled, nestled do give an allusion to mother and child, but I saw it as a man looking at his wife while she sleeps.
Come what may she believes
and that faith is somthing
I've never known before
come what may she loves me
making me love myslef a little more...
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the first time i read it i saw a mother then after reading your comments i saw it both ways i liked it. it expresses uncondittional love very nicely keep it up
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I can see both interpretations equally well, it really depends on who happens to be reading it. But the first stanza does make it look like a mother talking about her child, so I can see how your mother saw it that way.
Nice poem, sometimes the best poems are the ones that have multiple interpretations. -
i see someone who is lucky..and an author who portrays the sentiment well. nicely done.
Nyx... -
I too saw it from the eyes of a mother speaking about her child, the whole calloused hands image and all made me think about how I feel when I hold my daughter. I feel so rough against her perfect little self. very pretty piece.
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A+!
Hmmm... I'm not sure what I see. I think I see a man about his wife. Of course, one extremely different, much-better-than-the-usual sort of man... LOL. Not a guy, a man. OK, I'll shut up now. Yes, the poem is very good and I agree - it's more of a man than that of a mother who seems to be showing feeling - although, I must say, a man wouldn't ever word it like that. LOL! -
I can see why your Mother said that - it does talk of deep uncondtional love. The part though which makes me thinks it's a lover is the 'naked chest' as a Mom would most likely think 'breast'. either way I think it's a beautiful poem - your very first posted on AP and I hope to read more.
Well done and I enjoyed your poem very much
~Von~ -
Precious thoughts..
I agree it's easy to hear it both ways.
Precious thoughts,I can see your heart.
Good job.
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