Do You Believe When Two people ........!!!
Two lonely, bored souls floating through a chat room,
Looking for relief from everyday life.
What are the chances of these two souls,
Finding one another?
It happens.
Two totally different people, in separate countries,
But so similar in many ways.
What are the chances of someone,
Finding a kindred spirit?
It happens.
Two people, talking and arguing,
Over something truly trivial.
What are the chances of them,
Getting past that?
It happens.
Of the thousand of nameless faces,
In the vast world of cyberspace,
What are the chances,
Of falling in love?
It happens...
Author notes
Dedicated to my NetFriends
Written August 18th, 2006
A contest entry
- Make mine better by Son of Jim.
400 points, ended August 30, 2006, 3 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
Thank you dear Jim for the feedbacks and observations.
Took note of the contents and will do my best of ability !
Also my sincere thanks to all our AP friends Aidenn , Wolfmistress for the encouragements.
regards
subbu -
Pure friendship
first let me start off by saying thanks for entering. I realize it must have been hard to rewrite someone elses work without feeling like you would be stepping on their toes.
(highs): complete change in concept, concept itself, newer dated language, simplicity of last line, structure, economy of language, perspective(personal but not first person)
(lows): cliche's, timely language(which makes the poem ineffective over time), abstractions(soul, love, spirit, life), concept(never really cared for a few things but writing on writing and about internet affairs).
Overall this poem didn't grab me, not to be mean(everyone likes a little something different), it's not that there is anything generally wrong with it, just kind of petered out.
-
It happened to me too
And I was never happier in my whole life
So much in
And the dream of meeting one day will never go away..
Great write from you,
Good luck in this contest,
XXJeannette
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Amazing!
Wow. Great poem. And it's so true. My mom and her bf met over the internet and he lives in another country. We all go over and visit him and he comes to visit us. lol. it does happen! Awesome poem!
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