When summer's sun sets the day
and cooling mist rejoices night
An earthy, stillness haunts the dew
filled with memories of yesterday
Wanting you, not having you
I walk the beach in silent prayer
afraid to look into the moon
for fear I'll see your smiling lips
or catch the hint of sable hair
and eyes that dance like sailing ships
Wanting you, not having you
has stayed the course of lonely nights
of tortured steel and troubled air
I have but memories, far too few
that linger in my mind, somewhere
of when we both embraced the times
like love's song, never sweeter sung
and sang our days away in verse
like children singing nursery rhymes
The song becomes my nightly curse
And if I can not feel your breath
upon my chest another night
I can at least hold memories
of wanting you, not having you
for all of my remaining days
Wanting you... not having you
Author notes
Another Andrea poem.
Written July 25th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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me too, just browsing and ooooh what a nice treasure to have found in your words!!!! Fantastic, how you are so able to convey such very deep emotional thoughts!!!
This is simply great!
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I just happened to be browsing around, and stumbled upon this poem. It spoke to me in such a way that although my heart and soul felt the depth of the loss, I was left with the lingering thought of the beautiful memories the relationship gifted you with. I could feel the cooling ocean breeze, hear the constant drone of wave on shore, conflicting with your thoughts. An excellent write, I am honored to have stumbled across.
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This reads with a gentle rocking. In my mind eyes closed, sitting at the water's edge. Listening to the heartbeat of the ocean, feeling its pulse as it comes up around me pulling at me...wanting. Feeling myself sinking into the sand...not having what i want and need most. My love at my side. .
Absolutely beautiful!!
~Michelle~
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Seems we all long for something that our heart desires. Well composed and a delight to read.
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Tugging My Heart Strings
Bob...I love this poem. It is bittersweet, full of longing, and there is a resignation of acceptance that really tears at my heartstrings. This one goes on my poetry page...Love, Lane
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SuperSweetThoughtsToConveyThe Mind!!
This is one of yours, where it really takes off like a rocket for the provocatives any reader will find themselves immersed in!! Great Job!!
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hi, i just clicked over from your brother's page. i am new around here and i seen he had you referenced. seems you both are great writers of love for women. that is a popular thing to do for women, we love romance. on to your poem, you have done real good with this one. it is always good to find a guy who can have such loving words and care for someone. i have seen you entered this into a contest. i havent done any entering of any contests yet. i held one once to see what it was like. it was fun. anyways, your poem is real nice. i really enjoyed reading it. have a good night.
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Andrea how lovely she is here in your poetry
Beautifully written, it is so hard to want someone and not have them. Please read my poem "In My Heart Your Memory Lingers On. You have written about the memory far better than I. Your verse and stanzas flow extremely well. Your metaphors and similies are fresh and new. I like your style, I like what your heart has to say about Andrea, a lucky lady indeed...The breath upon the chest says a million words.Actually, all the lines are all profound.You should be very proud of your writing skills.
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Beauty From The Heart
Now Bob,
This is pure Beauty from the heart. The last 6 lines said it all.
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Hello Dr. Bob
I see that your brother is right! you have a great talent with words and have portrayed so much beauty here! I hear the angst within your lingering love; leaves me speechless! This is really serene and a bit haunting!~ truley a great work of art!
Autumn
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Lovely
Sometimes my logical mind can get in way of my reading
as such I find a wee bit imbalance in these 3 places
S1 L1 "When summer's sun sets the day"
Sets takes me to sunset and day takes me to midday
for some reason so maybe (way) instead of "day" might
fix my read there, though it could also be viewed as fix or focus like say concrete becoming "set" up after pouring, aka more permanent.
S2 L5 "and eyes that dance like sailing ships"
While a lovely line dance and sailing conflict in my mind, for dance is mixed movement while to sail is usually a straight line. Sailing would probably be the word I would focus on, though I have no replacement at current time. Ebb would be single direction too, and ebb and flow would be too long, passing would make me think she was cross-eyed so that wouldn't work, mingle brings to mind strange eyes, so I'd have to think more on what a good replacement for sailing might be.
In the second to last line maybe could remove "of my"
since self explanatory being in the first person perspective, leaving simply
"for all remaining days"
It had a light and a airy feel to it, so I enjoyed it very much...
Happy Holidays,
-Eddy
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I shall do my best to view Bob..but bear in mind I do choose not to be critical of anyone..my style is many and varied and do not usually conform to the norm..it just spills out with little effort..true feelings just do that I guess. Please give me a day or so as I am about at the end of reading and feeling this day...but I shall keep my promise.
Much love
Linda -
Dearest lohagh,
Thanks for reading my words about the love of my life, Andrea. If you would care to read my other Andrea sonnets, Memories of Andy, Words Of Love, and the story poem A Druids Spell, I would be ever so greatful. Please critique them, and I would be happy to read your work. Thank you, dear poet, Bob -
Dearest Recluse Writer,
Your critique is so kind, thatning for loving My "Andrea sonnet." If you would, I would like it if you would read my two other Andrea sonnets, Words Of Love and Memories Of Andy. "A Druids Spell" is also about this wonderful soalmate, Andrea, and an early adventure in the form of a stury-poem. Please read, and if you would critique the style, format, words and theme, I would be appreciative, greatly. Thanks so much, Love, Bob -
Darling r...
Oh unrequited love poems
in no other tomes
are hearts through about
echos unheard our shouts.
Smoosh
Janet -
I do find it difficult to comment on poems such as this...
my applause to you and deep appreciation lynn marie for giving me link.
So many strong and wonderful lines I shall not even go there.
Loved the ending...heck.. loved the whole write. If I only get 1/8th of the way to be able to write like this I would be happy.
Recluse Writer -
Bob,
This is breathtaking, so beautifully described. I've seen you comment to Rick about trying to use an economy of words, but in my opinion you have "economized" enough. The words you write bring the reader with you to a moment, where they can engage all the senses to see, feel, hear, smell, and touch whatever you are describing. Fantastic job on this, and congrats on the much deserved trophy.
~J. -
Thanks Wanda,
Thanks so much for the indepth critique, for reading and liking my words. You write and write and never know, especually in an empassioned, so personaal state, whether what you have penned is relatable to others or just yourself. I have a three-poem series of "Andrea sonnets" (actually modifide sonnet form with the seccond line being a null set in rhyme to make it more free-verse like) which include "Wanting You, Not Having You," "Memories Of Andy" and "Words Of Love" that I hope I can persuade you to read and critique. I value you detailed critiques mucho, so no holds barred, let me have it "betwixt the peepers" if need be. Thanks again, Bob -
Hay Rick,
Thanks so much for you constructive, honest critique over the months. You have oppened my eyes to the ecconomy of words. I know that I have been a slow student and it has been hard for you to be an honest evaluator because of our friendship. Thanks for all the inspiratin, remember that I am your biggest fan. Bob -
By the way, rlmcmd...I love art...particularly Cassatt, Degas, Renoir, DaVinci, Michaelangelo, John William Waterhouse, Alphone Mucha, Maxfield Parrish...etc. ~ I find most of the paintings that I use on my poems on art.com or progressiveart.com ~ you might like to take a stroll & peruse their collections...amazing stuff there, including vintage posters & things of that nature...Be well, Poet... Wanda
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"I walk the beach in silent prayer
Afraid to look into the moon
For fear I'll see your smiling lips
Or catch the hint of sable hair
And eyes that dance like sailing ships"
Ahhh, this is a lovely, loving poem, rlmcmd...I can easily see why it won your first trophy for you...Congratulations...Lynn sent me by; I've recently met your brother Rick, as well...Good people, both of 'em...As for your poem...I often say the following words to people; I think they bear repeating here...There is a lot of pain in this world that never achieves a voice. Your penning sings of it, making it nearly bearable. As Poets, we help shape the heart of the World; it is our honor, our responsibility & our pleasure to be the defenders of the throne. Your writing is well~defined & leaves a vivid impression on the eyes of your readers. Their souls are changed by the dance you've begun in silence. I am sorry for the depths & widths of your suffering. Even if it's "only a poem", you had to have known its unfathomable agony in order to understand it so well. You make it accessible & offer hope in the sharing. It isn't easy being a sentient human being, let alone a vastly creative Soul...the lives we lead are amazingly intense & sometimes quite painful, as well...You've given us a voice that isn't harsh or too much to handle...this is an in~depth piece, filled with impressive verbiage & purity of flow...self~analytical without being egocentric or delusional...It holds great imagery within, raw & easy to identify with...This is a vivid piece that causes one to contemplate the relevance of our own existence...I always try to leave a Light on in my own work & usually succeed...but I do have darker ones, as well...As Poets, we must be aware of the duality that exists within our own Hearts, & give them voice...yours holds clarity within...Hang in there, Poet...Life has a way of working things out, with or without our help...As the comedian Steven Wright said, "No, you can't go back & change the Past; then, again, you can't go back & screw up what you did RIGHT, either." That always struck me as being quite profound...May you find Peace & the Love you deserve...Be well, Poet... Wanda
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Excellent
Shit Bob, I almost.. almost.. cried. Now that is some GOOD writing
And if I can not feel your breath
Upon my chest another night
I can at least hold memories
Of wanting you, not having you
For all of my remaining days
Wanting you... not having you
Powerfull ending, and that is what is remembered, in our poems
.
Edited on Jul 25, 10:01 p.m. because 'Stupid spelling'. -
Congratulations on the trophy win!!
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this is amazing! i love love it
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The painting is and oil on canvis, three basic colors, after Mary Cassett I believe, apros 20" X 30" that hanges in my living room. The glare from the strobe takes away a lot of the detail.
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well written
oh my well i was adding poeple to my favs when i saw you had a new one.IM SO HAPPY. This was so damn beautiful. Sorry but it was awesome. descriptive, detailed, full of love and devotion. To love someone and cant have them this was a wonderful piece so well written. Lovely, lovely lovely. You have such a way of showing love and making readers feel it. Great job. Thanks for sharing. Loved it hun. keep penning, more often preferably.
sincerely
victoria
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