I will be around
If you're feeling down
I'll stay by your side
From beggining to the end
If you need a shoulder
To rest your sweet tears
I'm always here---
**slow music down, basically whisper**
You're my buddy you're my friend
Inseperable untill the end
That guy is a jerk
Just look at him smirk
You don't need him
---------------------
**music speeds up and start singing**
And when your day gets bad
Come find me and be-gone with your sad
ahhhhh CRAP!!!!!
THATS HORRIBLE!!!
I CANT WRITE!!!
EVERYTHING SOUNDS CHEESY!!
EVEN THE GUITAR SOUNDS CHEESEY!!
-ohhhhh wait---
i dropped a cheese square in it....
oooooooopsies!!!!
O.o
ok, im done....
my writing career is over!!
Author notes
waste of time..
thats prolly my last of lasts...
oh well,
it was fun while it lasted...
Written July 21st, 2006
What did you think
Comments
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not bad
SMY
i think your career as a lyricist is far from over, i just think you have to learn your instrument by expanding your experiences and that doesnt mean you have to go out and do everything you write about, a lot can be gained by using your mind, imagine how you or your characters would feel about situations, about emotions try and find different ways to express what you want to say, example in this piece would be:
you're my buddy you're my friend
inseperable to the end
could be written as:
your my sister, my friend
we'll be together thru the rain and wind
its just another way of putting the sentiment, i always find that the word buddy is a typically male word, where as sister is obviously feminine and where as using the word end does give a a definite finality to the relationship it doesnt give any real idea as to what end you mean, so it could be the end of the week, end of the month end of the commercial break, but together thru wind and rain kinda gives the idea that you will go thru storms, rough patches harshness together,
dont get me wrong i am not saying that you should change any of this piece and as you know when you add music to lyrics it always changes so much about the feel and intonation of the words.
i think that that if you keep on writing you will grow as both a lyricist and a poet, just explore and build on what you have.
Michael
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semi-good. i wont lie
lol. i like the last bit.
i like cheese...
it isnt all that bad
the first stanza is good..
but i think youre forcing it to much?
well work on it more it will be great
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