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Gone

I used to yearn for our enveloped photographs
to awaken -- again, embracing us in a
warm memory since gone,

and according to my calendars that was
a long time ago…

Now, I marvel why the snapshots aren’t yet
covered in dust, only to reminisce that
the memories are more whimsical
in mind than in reality. Fortunately,
my indulgence in solitude has removed
cobwebs that had veiled our shared years.

See -- air smells sweeter without
you breathing it before me,
and pillows feel fresher with only
my hair caressing them. The knot is untied,
and the white memorial marking on my finger
has healed and forgotten our past.

I have space to renovate myself
in today’s images, express myself, now
your brawny shadow has gone.

Author notes

I hope this fits. It's in the category broken heart (I hope) because it's about trying to get over the break up of a relationship. Thanks for reading.
Written July 19th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Creatress silver member
    February 28, 2007

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    Lovely

    Ah yes, I hope to one day be as fresh as your poem conveys. Being at the end of a long relationship, I need space to renovate myself too!
    --"The knot is untied,
    and the white memorial marking on my finger
    has healed and forgotten our past. "--
    Well said. I enjoyed the originality in your poem. A poem that talked about such a common occurrence, yet its you. You maintain a clarity and focus dealing with such a painful thing. I too hope to one day speak with such grace.
    Good Luck to You,
    --Creatress--


  • crisstiena
    July 21, 2006
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    I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken -- and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived. ~ Margaret Mitchell [Gone with the Wind]

    This is very nicely written. The flow is exceptional and the visuals are sharp and clear. Not overlong either. And I admire your courage and your positive outlook. Not an easy thing to do.

    Thanks for sharing
    ~ crisstiena

  • shelly webster
    July 21, 2006
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    yargh, matey. good.

    yeah. n.n this is a refresher.
    written like this.. moving on and thinking that this was for the best looks so easy. its not, we all know that. but i loved how you gave examples in real life how it IS better.. you can say its better.. but how? and you showed that. this showed someone regaining power and self-control. showing that the world DOES go on and you should make the most of it.
    great write. i really enjoyed it. xD
    __lid


  • LadyUnique silver member
    July 21, 2006
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    sometimes it is wonderful to be free of someone. a few times i've stayed with someone or something longer than i should have out of habit. once i made the change i felt great. loveless marriages and boring jobs are what i'm talking about so i see this poem as something i can relate to...only you said it better than me

  • The Last Poet
    July 21, 2006
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    Nicely done... i like how you emphasized the "long time ago"... this piece was different from most as you pointed out in the authors comment.. and it was well written... so keep writing...


  • Stoneface Gremlin
    July 19, 2006
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    I totally agree. This is a refreshing break from the traditional "I miss you" poems that are so over done these days. I like the way you did it as well. You convey such strength of spirit and determination in the words you used. I see only one problem and it is just a spelling thing. It is in the fourth paragraph. It starts with "See-air". I am not sure if this is intentional or not but I think that you meant "Sea-air". If it is intentional to use "See" instead of "Sea" then, could you explain why you had chosen to do so? I am lost to the meaning of that sentence with the word "See".

  • The Last Poet
    July 19, 2006
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    Great language throughout the piece... the flow of was well done.. and the poem itself was very expressive... short and to the point... everything in this poem fit.. nothing seemed out of place... well done.. keep writing

  • SouthernBelle09
    July 19, 2006
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    I like this,it is very good and the way you described not holding on to memories even though its unrealistic because most people are hurt when someone they love leaves and the memories that are there,unless they didnt love them but anyway great write. ~Laura

  • Sleepless sapphire
    July 19, 2006
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    I loved the emotions you expressed in this. The idea of getting over someone can be painful, but as you've shown it's possible. Great job!
    Edited on Jul 19, 12:44 because ''.


  • Ava Noire silver member
    July 19, 2006
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    I think the last two stanzas were the most expressive. I know the feeling of longing, and forgetting things (and people) of the past. Sounds as if you have gained strength, or since this isn't personal, the character in this piece has gained strength in knowing life is better without said person.


  • silverscent gold member
    July 19, 2006
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    Thanks!

  • angelelectra
    July 19, 2006
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    This is a great piece! i love the way you portray that holding on to past memories are not worth the time and pain. What i also like about the poem is the imagery evoked and the structure, beautiful read!

1 - 12 of 12