'He reads, He Weeps'
He reads, He weeps
A man's heart
So young and brave
He takes his steps
Into the world
Where blood is raining
And now he
Must fight amongst it
The heart of Jesus
He holds dear
But takes his gun
To end so much misery
"I'm sorry, mom"
He whispers in the night
As he gives his life
Twenty-one shots now heard
For the man
Who gave his life
For God and Country
Who has now become a hero
To his comrades and his mom
©Nicolette Everett
Author notes
Nicolette Everett
A contest entry
- Prewrites that dont suck. by parachute fog.
400 points, ended October 20, 2007, 93 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Round 1: Hit me With your Best Pre-write. by edit my world..
425 points, ended October 20, 2007, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - From Trash to Treasure by star wars fanatic.
1500 points, ended February 22, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I like the fact that this piece makes you think. It's very obscure, and nicely done. But in the spirit of improvement, I do have have one bone to pick. lol
Especially in poems like this, where they're in story form, the continuous text can be a little overwhelming. I would suggest separating this into stanzas to ease reading and add emphasis.
Thx for entering my contest, and let me know what you think about my comments.
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very nice sentament
too bad man can't change and find peace before young men are buried everyday
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This brought tears to my eyes. I cannot even imagine this happening. My daughter served in the US Navy and was in the Gulf for 8 months. She is out now but I never forget the fear that I kept inside while she was out there.
Support our troops even if we do not support our foreign policy.
Soulful Woman
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touching and poignant
there are things we were not meant to do... and to me losing a child is the hardest thing we can experience... so this is a piece which i think everyone can relate to and understand...
" we see the lives that war does not return"
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Execellent
I agree with the other comments this is very sad. I can not express just how grateful we all should be for these men and women who put their very lives on the line for us everyday. They should be respected and honored. It disgust me eveytime I hear someone critizing the soldiers in Iraq whether you agree or disagree with this war, remember those who are serving and risking everything for YOU!(not the writer of this poem but everyone in general) This poem was excellently written. God Bless them! Melody
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This was a sad piece. It reminds all of us in the world of the soldiers fighting in Iraq and what they're probably going through right now. I hope your son will make it through okay. Sending good thoughts.
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Thank you. I wrote it awhile back and it's meant for men and women and for everyone in all the wars that have ever happened. And I'll keep your son in my prayers.
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My son is in Iraq right now and that just made me cry.
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