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Sleep

Lying awake
Yearning to sleep
But restlessness keeps rest at bay

My brain is on edge
Tense and alert
Thoughts swirling round in my head

There's nothing to see
Yet my eyes will not close
Waiting for night's soft embrace

Thoughts of your face
Flash through my mind
Sweet words whispered in my ear

Lull me to sleep
Wrap me in dreams
Watch me as I drift away

Author notes

I kinda had a weird, melodic tune in mind when I wrote this, if that helps a bit.
Written July 17th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18

  • Chu
    October 8, 2007

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    this poem is fantasticly soothing, I can hear it as a lullaby. Something similar to the one that assemblage 23 wrote or a perfect circle. I love the last stanza, the first two lines in it suggests someone looking over the narrator and comforting them, keeping them close where the last one suggest that the person has died or left the narrator, by dying or a break upand instead of keeping the person close the narrator can feel them slipping further and further away. It has such a sad melody running through it. I know that it seems odd, but it does, and for some reason the poem seens to bring out this undifined sadness in me, so, as I said. Well written


  • DeadlyTurnip
    September 7, 2007

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    Dude. You are AWESOME! This poem just proves that. I just went to look at your page. Anyway,
    I think a lot of people can definitely relate to this. At least, I most certainly can. Your word choice was really good in this. Keep writing!


  • MissyAnn
    August 14, 2007

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    Geez! it's not nice to get inside somebodies head! especially if you dont' know em! taken these thoughts! lol i'm jp....but serious good write!


  • Merry Christmas
    July 25, 2007

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    This poem is great!! I love it and it does kind of have a tune in it. I can definitly relate to what you're saying.


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    July 16, 2007
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    fuck yeah

    i loved this it was a great poem and relatetd to every word, well done fantastic poem


  • Dienush
    January 21, 2007

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    I can so relate to this. Indeed it does sound rhythmic and pleasant to the ear, so yes your explanation helps.


  • Rockstar
    December 21, 2006
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    Pretty Good

    Great write! Definately different, but, in a good, unique way


  • Disuke
    December 5, 2006
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    Brilliant

    Dude, Awesome I\'m at School and All But Damn. I Felt Really Connected To This Poem & Even Though You and I Are Brothers I Still Felt A Like I Didn\'t Understand Why It Came Out. Oh and You Stupid Jew Insomiac .


  • Miss Sweet Kisses
    December 3, 2006
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    !!

    Nice work sir!!
    i liked it very much!
    xoxoKerry


  • Mrs. Serial Killa
    October 16, 2006
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    guilty of being such a great poet!

    I love all your poems good job!!


  • DecayedxBeauty
    July 28, 2006
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    Oren!
    Lol awwwes. I agree with heartbeat. Really good and all, but it tis the opposite for me. Very sweet, kinda seems angelic like. Soft. Dunno lol. Don't ask. I'm thinking of it being a peaceful type poem so yeah. Awesome job.
    <3Lex


  • think of me x
    July 24, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    thats really good. kinda the opposite 4 me tho. whhen i think of the person i love (inconveniently thts my best friend) i cant sleep and i stare at the cieling 4 hrs b4 i finally drift 2 sleep.


  • PoetryPunky
    July 18, 2006
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    I agree with everyone above. This is a really awsome peice Oren. I luffles it At night i definatly have to think of the person i love most. He knows who he is But yesh everynight before i drift off to sleep i imagine im in his arms. *Sighs* I wish i could see him! Paitence is a virture i shall remember that.. Awesome write i love the three liners. This had a nice flow to it though. Perfect.

    I luffles you
    Punky


  • Immer Leben
    July 18, 2006
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    Awesomeness beyond awesomeness

    Very impressive, hun. very great! i really love it. very deep, and interesting. very awesome and perfect, sweetie!

    ~Solo-Chan


  • Rythm
    July 18, 2006
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    Wow...all this positive feedback is kinda suprising...I didn't really think this poem was that good when I wrote it


  • Viva La Vie Boheme
    July 18, 2006
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    I couldn't sleep last night and it's 10 am now so I'm going... sleeeeeep! Very fitting poem. And so sweet too! Okay, I hate it when people say that to me, so let me then say... you managed to grasp your emotions and put them down well in this piece.


  • White Rose Dragon
    July 17, 2006
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    Loving it

    How awkward...I feel the same way as well...so I do have to ask...is this a good thing or a bad thing? Oh..and I agree with everything Mau said about this peice. Very nicely written Oren.

  • Mau Rose
    July 17, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    hmm... this is actually a familiar feeling... I cannot sleep unless I think of the one I love, things she's said to me... I'm tone deaf, so the tune part doesn't help, but it is a meaningful poem... I like it... once again, thank you for finding a way to express this to the rest of us in words.
    happy hunting

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1 - 18 of 18