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like a stone




 Little twinkling up in my dark sky...
 Imagine the immense eternity of heavens with
 Kaleidoscopic glittering glee
 Evasion is the key word now
 
 And you'll never cease to amaze me...

 Simple pleasures,special needs she said she had, but
 To fulfill all without failing i find my senses
 Obliterated !
 No clouds tonight,very clear sight and in the gloom
 Entwined our bodies lay, for ever





like a stone...

Author notes

song 87...
not one of my best works but definitly one of the weirdest and i'm glad i was invited so i could come up with smtg like that !
Written July 9th, 2006

A contest entry

What did you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • Nour Beydoun
    June 3

    Edit | Reply
    I don't know why I haven't read this before.. When I read the line "simple pleasures" I almost heard you say it with that accent of yours..
    well done..


  • Poetry-and-rhyme
    January 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is nice if you claim this not to be ur best what about the best it should be rocking rocking


  • sommerregen
    May 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Splendid poem

    Reading your poem allows to imagine and to understand the feeling of eternity!


  • Apsinthion
    July 29, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    " And you'll never cease to amaze me... "

  • hypnotic-pen
    July 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    BIT3A222EDDDD YA ZALAME!! BAS A7LA SHI I LOVE THE ODD WORDS LIKE "KALEIDOSCOPIC", YOU ALWAYS HAVE THAT TOUCH IN YOUR PEOMS!!! GREAT!


  • sarajevo
    July 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    amigo !! i know you have some info about this bass keep your mouth shut man this is a secret for now !! LOL
    thanks for the comment man
    u tc w yalla c u soon


  • XFaLLen-StarX
    July 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    u and ur nasty words :p

    Little twinkling up in his dark sky
    Spark again and shine his empty life
    You ran the joy & love through his veins
    Bring him back and get the key word erased

    He amazed u as well Im sure

    Simple pleasures,special needs sound hollow to what you feel
    Endings are not made for you indeed
    Beautiful days you'll only face
    Now remember all the love he gave ..

    xxx

    Edited on Jul 10, 12:31 because ''.


  • N0sferatu
    July 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    excellent

    Yes my friends this is tributed to someone.
    Amigo, this was amazing.
    "but To fulfill all without failing i find my senses
    Obliterated !"
    Good luck in the contest.


  • Angel With No Halo
    July 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This was just teriffic hon.I am very glad you decided to enter!!!Hana makes it so hard sometimes to come up witha great coment but,You are very talented and I am impressed.LOL. Good luck hon!!


  • No deliverance
    July 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is amazing Serge!
    You have made me proud!
    I am just really glad to see this here! I am thrilled that we delayed the closing time of the contest!
    First of all, you chose a song that is a personal favorite of mine! I love Audioslave.
    Second of all, your word choice is impeccable, I loved every word of every line!!!
    This is tender and sweet, romantic and dreamy and it shows your true nature!
    Did I mention that you are friggin' talented?
    Rock on!!!!
    And I am expecting to see more of your writes!
    Much much Love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    ~Hana~
    Edited on Jul 09, 3:15 p.m. because 'I can'.

  • pozo
    July 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Is this tributed to anyone? I liked the imagery and alliteration here Keep writing, this was a very powerful poem
    Thanks for your comment
    All the best
    Pozo

1 - 11 of 11