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A Different Kind of Sarcasm

My only solace
In need of its aid
 Resembles chain smokers
  Filling their lungs
   An uncalled deathwish
    Producing no merit
     Escorting them nowhere
      The empty comfort
       This has become
        That seems to conceal
         My cavernous presence
          In perverse population
           Forced separation
            Rips out my hair
             When better to part
              I choose to decay
               In an unfavored hull
                Mere cobwebs acquired
                 And nothing more
                  Yearning for sunlight
                   Cry for reality
                    A desperate scream
                     That seems so mundane
                      It's in my horizon
                       Too simple to reach
                        Yet so far...

Author notes

Basically I need to get out more and make something of myself instead of sitting in front of my computer 24/7. It's so unproductive.
I am pathetic.
Written July 6th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • YesterdaysFeelings
    July 7, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I sense....thesaurus? Haha, good job though. It's definitely not what I'd expect from people your age.

  • Ludmila607
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Precious.....

    I dont think this is a love poem.I think this is a Hope poem.Hope of finding any sense, hope to find something new.Hope of change place or state of mind.
    From the dark we can mov to the light, if we dare...as Sister of Mercy song says....JUST WALK ON IN....


  • Dancing Marionette
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I love the layout of the poem, it's definitely not something you see on every poem. Also, I just love the title of the poem. Awesome job!

    Nickole

  • Rainbow Eater
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    you have talent

  • Revwilliamfoos
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    it is great to think and even greater to write of thoughts keep doing well
    love the papa


  • ShakespearesLady
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    wow! very interesting love the imagery
    cool slant effect


  • Hallie Kavanagh
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    "Forced separation
    Rips out my hair
    When better to part
    I choose to decay"
    This is my favourite part of this poem. Great write.


  • blackday
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Wow. Just... wow. I love the layout. it's just something... new. I've also read somewhere that if you write slanting down, then it means you're depressed, so I felt that.

    -Chase


  • Creatress
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Great

    I really like this poem. I also love the way you layed it out. Very well done. Very exspressive and emotional. My favorite line was: My cavernous presence
    In perverse population
    Forced separation
    Rips out my hair
    When better to part
    I choose to decay
    Very well done!


  • Gangsta
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Wow!! this speaks volumes, loved it, every word, so strong yet a little heartfelt i thought, good work keep them coming!! x


  • kuliraga
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    "A desparate scream that seems so mundane" This is my favorite line. It speaks to the monotany that sometimes a constant agony can become. A hard, dark, reality check. Well Done!

  • homicidal beauty
    July 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This si a great abd powerful poem I love it. Its emotional and amazing. I love the title and these lines...

    "An uncalled deathwish
    Producing no merit
    Escorting them nowhere
    The empty comfort
    This has become
    That seems to conceal
    My cavernous presence"

    i love the dark personality of this poem.

    cammy

1 - 12 of 12