Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
 

The Story Continues

      I’ve lost you
      I don’t know how it happened or when
      But you were gone long before you left

      There was that undeniable chill from you
      But it was deniable only to me

      I saw the blankness in your eyes
      As you gazed off somewhere

      I wanted to fight for you
      But had no weapons
      You had already surrendered to
      Something or someone

      I will be fine
      I have loved the best and
      Once upon a time
      He loved me

      This chapter may be closed
      But the story continues



Author notes

Written July 4th, 2006

In a list

What did you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • mjseattle silver member
    September 5, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Good

    Well, well, well. You're back again, tugging on those heart strings, I see. I can relate to this one. But when mine ended it took me to a very dark place. Gives me the creeps to think about it, really. So I won't think about it. Anyway, this one is one of my favorits of yours. Take care.

  • LadyUnique silver member
    August 29, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    i liked this
    the way you've lain this out works really well.
    'you were gone long before you left'...those are are well put words...capturing something most of us have dealt with before.
    this is a very good poem. nicely done

  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    August 15, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I wanted to fight for you
    But had no weapons
    You had already surrendered to
    Something or someone

    The sentiments and its pace can turn into the poetic words and if it is done..then only the heart become peaceful because it is said that when we share our pain then our pain is always decreasing..this is a very touchy work indeed...

  • blondone
    July 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    awe so sad but the poem is so meaningful you brought lots to the table a great write and I hope things get better for you...

  • Soulful Woman silver member
    July 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you DawnBaby for your kind comments.. This was just something I wrote a few months ago...for no particular reason.
    Soulful Woman

  • DawnBaby gold member
    July 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    This was excellent! What imagery, sounds way too familiar. Great job on this piece poet! Sorry for your pain as well.

  • James L Williams
    July 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome poem. great job. Good Luck in my contest!!!!!!!


    Luke
  • Puppydog gold member
    July 5, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    DIRECTLY FROM YOUR HEART

    I am going through something similar now myself, yes we go on and find new friends and new people to give our love to. This is a very beautiful and heart-felt poem

  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    July 4, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Oh no!! I hope this isn't about the love I just read and commented on. Very well written. So sad and painful. Jeannie D Hunter
1 - 9 of 9