The luscious tumble of a bunch of black grapes,
peeled by pink fingernails, the skin folded back
to tender flesh, hidden pip, and running juice,
making my tongue ache.
This is how I hold a grape between my lips –
tenderly, as though it was a sweet nipple,
and sinking in the temptation of breast-points’
bare resilience.
Two lips making one wine-press, making much wine.
One tongue taking grape-flesh on its very tip
and leaving it as a blessing on taste-buds
that quiver and wait.
Errant fruit can drop right into the valley
between beloved breasts, and oh what fun then!
Laughter in loving is sun on dew on fruit,
sharp coolness in warmth.
Burying my hand in her dark, dark vine-leaves,
to pull her close, and make mauve rivulets run,
following with lips, and tongue, and teeth biting,
kissing, and licking.
It is my way to bring the bunch to my face
and come away covered in the dust of bloom.
It is hers to delve deep for more and more juice,
hands and lips at once.
Oh, how much bloom and how much juice can be made?
Endless as a stream is our double sweetness,
my name is fruit on her lips, and I kiss it
with hers in return!
In the time when juices dry to lovely stains,
and the memory of musk fills the night air,
I can watch the glow of bright, beloved eyes
fade into sleeping.
And in that sleep why dream of pomegranates,
the bitter kiss of oranges and lemons?
Grape-kissing will make you avid for more wine,
more juice of love’s fruit.
Author notes
Written June 30th, 2006
In a list
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Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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very rich description... i especially liked the sensual description of eating grapes in the first three stanzas, it is vibrant and creative, with graceful transitions.
"luscious tumble"
"tender flesh, hidden pip, and running juice,
making my tongue ache."
"taste-buds
that quiver and wait."
lovely word choice and with subtle undertones
i wasn't quite as fond of it when the metaphor became more overt rather than suggestive. there were some beautiful lines and images, such as in the "In the time when juices dry to lovely stains" stanza, which is breathtaking, and "the bitter kiss of oranges and lemons," ""sharp coolness in warmth" but as you go on about hands and lips and breasts and juice and licking i feel you repeat what you have already told us in those first few stanzas much more powerfully and sort of wear out the very creative metaphor by the end. the final line especially could be more subtle and fresh i think.
but this really is a wonderful, lush piece, very well-written. i love the form of this, it gives it a mellowed exuberance, elegant and gentle, like wine. -
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Thanks for the comprehensive criticism. When I mention breasts it is to remind people - hey! we actually are talking about eating grapes here, and one might just happen to fall. When I mention hand, I take the metaphor straight back to vine-leaves. It's all deliberate, and all designed to swim in and out of the metaphor. The repetition is deliberate too, suggesting that I am gorging myself, indulging in excess. I am glad you enjoyed it overall.
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brilliant
rich vibrant and full of flavour... love the title, love the exuberant eroticism, and the very Sapphic feel of the piece in form and subject matter. Thank you for sharing!
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I am glad you like it - you seem to have appreciated exactly what I was trying to do.
Thank you.
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this is wonderful, Mairi! I don't think I've seen this one before! I am just amazed at how naturally these lines flow. You really have a gift for these.
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Well I had such a nice inspiration for this one. {blushing}
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I am glad you liked it, Tangle. As for the contest, two other people used both of my ideas for contests, so I am back to the drawing board.
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Dear Mairi,
And what of the pomegranates and all those nasty seeds, but oh the juice there is worth the burden!
Yes, your voyeur is back and enjoying the fruit of the poem.
A fresh picked poem!
Your barm-pot,
Tangle
ps - where is that contest you've been saving for? -
Oh I have already done it for blackberries!
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grape expectations of further writes
Hmmm, I shall never eat grapes again without feeling incredibly self conscious. I already have trouble with strawberries. You'd better not do this with my favourite fruit, blackcurrents, or I'll be spending my summer meals feverishly trying to change the subject of my inner thoughts. -
Oh I just love using metaphor!
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wow i never thought a poem about eating grapes could be so sexy and sensual, brilliant job! i enjoyed reading this, there are some great double meanings, well done
amy -
OH to be a grape apon his lips
that he would partake of me
till he is fully quenched.
or something like that. I love the double meanings here. A very sensual write. You are always so good.
so to speak. I don't care how many times you think you need to rewright I'm willing the first three were just as pleasing.
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TD, I shall write lots more!
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Oh go on, Melodies - post it and expand their consciousness!
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Bueno!
Oh my auntie. You have a very naughty erotic mind! I looooooooooooooooooooooove it! It was like watching a great lesbian sex scene in a movie; I could see,smell,taste and almost feel the action vividly. It held so much passion and excitement;and on the other hand it portrayed love and tenderness. It sort of reminded me of young love and early sex in a brand new relationship. This was a great piece. You must write more!
Edited on Jul 11, 10:53 because 'typos'. -
A sweet poem, certainly
The grape vineyard has exploded with passionate energy. If I posted this on Poetry Planet, .....
.....oh my goodness! When I first started reading it, I thought I might. Now how about writing a poem about a goldfish? Or the daddy long legs spider I just saw in back of my computer? 
Your poem here has blessed us all with rapture to capture!
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Ta Scribs. I think I'll leave it as it stands, otherwise the next re-write could be worse.
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I guess the poem must be 90% imagination, Toots.
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Nice write. Wish that I were the grape. If you are not happy with this then when you are it will be more amazing.
Scribs -
I have a question. How do you pay enough attention to hold down a job and live like this poem suggests? I'm having a hard time breathing; and work? What is that? Whew!
Gotta love you! Shiny Sis
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No, even the great Mairi bheag struggles with her art.
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Third or fourth re-write?.. I'm crushed, I imagined everything
you write coming out perfect the first time around...
Glad to know I'm not the only one suffering over mere words..
I think it's perfect... but then what do I know? lapoe...
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Poe, I have to say this is my third or fourth re-write, and I do not think I am satisfied with it yet. I'm glad you like it.
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Too late, Merc. This ol' t-shirt is well stained!
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Oh my Mairi, you are a heady bottle of wine today.. corked
and ready...and you've blown that cork right out of the bottle
and hit the ceiling... everyone drink up... Mairi's pouring..
and we're lapping it up...I'd give this 5 Grapes.. and a big
grape stained thumbs up... lapoe...
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excelent
A sensual experience that borders on the religious- kind of like wine- just be careful not to stain your tee-shirt. Wonderful work once again.
Mercury Rising
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