the setting sun,
or preempt
the coming dawn?
Or should I settle
on the evening's
approaching steed,
as its charcoal veil
stains the crimson sky?
The bleeding heavens
keep calling out,
but they matter
not to me-
in time, the stars
with their flashy show
shall fill the darkness,
like diamond shards
stabbing through
an ebony curtain...
But they misunderstand.
I stand here
not to look at them.
I'm waiting
for the rain.
Author notes
Err, I kinda am back... I'm feeling quite shi---tty so I came up with this uh equally shi---ty piece. It's not as good as my past works, but right now, I have to release my emotions.
anyway, I'm not usually this "pessimistic" but then, I need to release this.
The sky is a beautiful thing, but then, it's all about perspective. People view things differently. And, when someone's feeling all bad... sometimes, even the sunrise and sunset could appear ugly to them... That explains the bleeding part and sarcasm that's implied here, I guess.
Evening's steed = the moon
Stab (the title) = a small pain, perhaps, something I'm feeling right now. 
Written June 27th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
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Interesting write. Great use of imagery in this piece. I also like the rain some days. I don't like snow because it's ususally cold when winter starts. But, in the spring I always find it nice to be able to walk in the rain. very well written piece here. Keep up the great work.
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Excellent
I've felt stabbed a few times too. Very wonderful poem. -
Your poetic words give me goosebumps
Lovely, Lovely poem. I feel honered that you liked my poem. Keep them commin
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hey thanks for the comment!!
yeah i do know John lennons song Imagine...thats wut inspired me for that one. lol. Anyway o that sucks that ur in school!!! ouch! im starting in like 2 weeks so im enjoying every moment right now haha. anyway i read this poem and I LOVED IT! really good use of imagery! it is not shitty at all! jeez i thought it was very good! dont doubt urself!
good work! keep in touch
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Wah... Thank you very much
But I called it "shi---tty" because back when I was writing it, I was not able to weave my emotions in the text, the poetry itself. It seemed emotionally constipated to me, but I think the fact that it (the poetry) merely implies some things kinda worked for my advantage
again, thank you for the comments
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Wel honey if this is your sh-tty one let me read on this was fantastic!! You were kidding weren't you. Well I will just have to check and see since I'm sitting here talking to myself. Lol. Robinrae the FaeryPixieFey.
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^^ Yes I know this pain all too well. Not being able to write and feeling sheety, it works itself up to explode in pure poetry-trust me. This poem isn't as bad as you think, but work cannot be done unto it, it's a poem that's there to remind you not all our works are meant to be inspiring or excellent. I'm digressing now...just keep writing and keep working toward the explosion.






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