they sat across from each
other at the back of Fred's Bar
the corner was dim
and choked
on furls of cigarillos
screwing virginia slims
an antique table hoisted
her elbows and white russians
and umbrellaed his sweat and drips
of long island iced teas
cracked red vinyl seats
knew their asses well
and groaned under
their shifting weights
wishing it had a mouth.
no one else heard
drifts of sultry's whisper
or the succulence she promised
"Oh, you like it like that?"
he could only drool and nod
images of toes with grips
tenacious as an enraged pitbull
dulled his eyes.
"yeah, that's good, that's
the spot" he sputtered
they shocked the salt
and pepper shakers
right over the edge
"let's go and finish
this else where" he pants
"no, not yet" she murmurs
"come, let's dance" she
pouts through red-painted
implants
she gets up, rearranges
the black wisp of a dress
grinds the air
as she sashays towards the dance floor
"one more thing --
what did you say
your name was?"
Author notes
Ok, ok I've stepped way out of my usual box and comfort zone.
Gheez it sure is warm in here!
Oh and yeah, I'm always editing
Written June 24th, 2006
A contest entry
- Contest: To You, Dear Stranger by Diseased Mind.
300 points, ended July 5, 2006, 17 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Ah thanks dear friend. Congrats on your well deserved gold.
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I started reading this today -- but work got in the way and I was heating up.
Congrats on your bronze -- it is good to step out of the comfort zone and into the heat.
Lisa
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hmmm definitly kinky...not my typical cup of tea..no pun intended..because I usually lean toward a more romantic approach...for one I would never fuck someone if I did not know their name so the ending really didn't do anything for me, but the rest of it was spetacular. This poem to me was like lovemaking without an orgasm. Which is why I want it to keep going...lol
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Thanks so much for reading. I've been here at AP for a while but, took some time off. I'm back now and in a writing frenzy.
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LOL! Maybe the muse is
Glad you enjoyed the read. -
Very good piece. I am unfamiliar with your other works, however the description, the tone, the feeling put into this work is very smoothly intertwined. Nicly written with alittle bit of spice.
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hehehehe, thats funny but yet hummmmmmmmm are you HORNY? j/k. lol
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Thanks so much for reading. I'm glad you enjoyed my deviation from my normal writes.
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Thanks so much for reading. It was a new way of writing for me.
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X cellent
Powerful imagery that leads the reader to the setting completely... havent read the rest but this ROCKS.! -
LOL thanks so much for reading. I just love the endings of your comments.
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Wow, that was very surreal. I can just see those red barstools. And I love "black wisp of a dress". Very good and believable.
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I like this one!! It is hot...and steamy! I like the twist at the end...unexpected yet it fit so perfectly. Wonderfully done and best of luck to you in the contest!!
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a good descriptive piece, strangers in the moments, as we all begin. spill poetic ink and twist me into the wild lemony crazy shape of unfathomable love...
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Thanks again dear jane. I stepped out of my usual comfort zone and took the piece down a road seldom ventured.
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Red Hot!
Wonderful! It was hot and sultry! Red vinyl, red lips, and red hot! Whew! Jane -
I agree, seems that great minds do think alike...yes
Glad you enjoyed the read. -
love this. came to your page to read granuals of sand but was drawn to this one cos I wrote a poem called tuesday night blues at 3am, how strange things seem at that time of night
Adding your comment:
1 - 18 of 18
8 old applause
