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Crash

I cry for a time that passes like sand,
Passes like cars on the freeway
where no one pulls over for the accidents

And speed bumps leave scars
To mark the months and fade with years.
Maps written in blood and tears
Points marked out in tragedy.

Yeah, you're my tragedy..

So, take this wheel and take me home
Pass my months like years,
Slowly dying here with you..

And I cry for a time,
When I knew I was alive
When we knew who we were

In your car, going straight, smiling at you
Then hitting the turns,
Crashing your car.
Like you crashed into my life.

It just not the same anymore.
You're a faint memory of bright lights
Faded into a person I barely know.
You're making cracks in the road.

Won't you just drive me home..







Author notes

FightOffYourDemons

A contest entry

What did you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • CaffineAddict90
    November 17
    Edit | Reply
    Great write! Thnx for entering the contest!


  • RazorbladeKiss14
    September 13
    Edit | Reply
    Very good!!! Thank you for entering and good luck in my contest!!!


  • Heva Feva
    June 6
    Edit | Reply
    Great job. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva


  • HopeInForever
    December 13, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "And I cry for a time,
    When I knew I was alive
    When we knew who we were"

    amazing. i loved this. the imagery and the feelings conveyed. perfect.


  • HereComesTheSun
    October 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    wow just wow
    i mean this poem really truly just hit me with emotion and imagery
    wow


    • FightOffYourDemons
      October 21, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks, after a bad day coming on here and having someone wow, not one but two of your poems is such a great pick me up and completely appreciated !


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    October 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I really love that last line, great write. Thank you for entering the contest, good luck.

    ♥
    whisper


  • Shakari
    June 25, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This piece was excellent! I loved the suspenseful feeling, the metaphors, the detail (which led to imagery), and much more! This piece seemed weaker towards the end, but the last line was awesome. I think that you were the one that was told you could go on into the voting for top twelve, so good luck! Thanks for sharing and keep up the great writing!


  • Whispered Devotions
    June 25, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I am so glad to see a survey now!


  • Whispered Devotions
    June 24, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I really really reaaly like this poem. Actually I love this poem. the imagery and the metaphors blow me away. I am a metaphor freak and you have weaved such a clear picture across my mind. The begining was my favorite part, but that was a hard choice in itself to make because the whole poem was magnetic. I am glad that you have made the moving on list, I must say though that you still dont have an interview on here. To be fair I am not sure if that will leave you available to move on any further. I hope this is not the case; however, you do need the survey on here. Wonderful job and good luck.


    Amy

  • marrow
    June 24, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed the content of this, and I have noted your skill. Just throw up that interview, so we can know a little more.

    Best of luck in judging,
    J


  • Tangled Angle
    June 24, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Oh yeah, you didn't even include the survey.


  • OutsideTheMirror
    June 23, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I really like it- the imagery is gorgeous.
    :And speed bumps leave scars
    To mark the months and fade with years.
    Maps written in blood and tears
    Points marked out in tragedy.:

    ^my fav part

    .:Marie:.


  • Tangled Angle
    June 23, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    No, you are not too late, there were spots available for Black group and White group. (you are in the black group)

    I thought this was a good poem with a creative story behind it. The metaphors were pretty good. If you aren't one of my top 3, you'll probably be put in the wildcard category (not one of the top 3, but deserves a shot of Top 16 anyway)

1 - 15 of 15