If I had a song to sing
Or just whisper in your ear,
My words would not be so kind:
My softness cannot hide disgust.
Bitter bile of my contempt;
Breaking back to where I was:
Choking me, it's choking you-
Betrayer of a sacred trust!
Melody is but venom;
The rhythm is my heartbeat:
A higher octave of rage:
Who plays hearts like instruments?
I saw a man, once distant.
I hear stories of his crime;
And he wears your mask sometimes,
The murderer of innocence!
The brokenness and anger
You generate cause me
To rage; to cage my own self.
I have a song; just one goodbye.
The darkness inside of me,
Now conquered, leads me to sing,
Or perhaps only whisper
This: My acidic lullaby.
Author notes
Consider this work the poetic equivalent of my screaming into a pillow.
Written June 20th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
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Dear Karen,
I appreciate the gesture, as well as the quote. This poem, while very meaningful and full of emotion for me, is actually directed at a person who inflicted pain on someone very dear to me. In fact, the incident was years ago, but continues to affect then. I tend to be a man of rather deep-seated venom, but I would rather write poisonous poetry than, say, hunt someone down and do them physical injury. However, I do still take your encouragement to heart, because I suppose I am a rather 'affected' person: the troubles of others tend to become my own. So, again, I greatly appreciate your encouragement, and would gladly accept a hug, were we able to meet face to face. However, seeing as at the moment, that is impossible, the intention is sufficient to bring me a bit of cheer.
Warmly,
ST -
Ouch...the pain and anger leaps out at me....batters me, like a punch to the face. I don't know you, but there's nothing I'd like more right now than to hug you...just to make you stop hurting a little. I'm so sorry for your troubles. I'd like to share with you an insirational quote that I like for those tough times..."If it weren't for the rocks in it's bed, the stream would have no song." Hang in there, Seagrid.
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Dear Beth,
You are as always, most kind. I have had my own unique struggles and business in the last few weeks; and yet I suppose they are not unique as I am a subject of the human condition, as are we all. I am anticipating that I shall be around more often, but I can make no guarantees. The life of a wandering bard knows know stability. It was a pleasure to have a message from you when I logged in. I shall speak to you again, I am sure.
Warmly,
ST -
Oh wow.. I can definately hear the loathing in this, the contempt. I get an idea of what might have taken place from reading this piece, and even though it's none of my business and I don't know if I'm right or not, I think your anger is justified.
You've been away so long- I hope things in general are going much better for you then this piece would suggest. I've missed talking to you on a semi-regular basis, and getting to know you.
I'm glad you're back. At least for right now.
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