The world is coming down
my heart is acking, my face is frowned
Having a slash through my heart, and a circle all around
Life's not fair, no it's not
I have nothing to live for, and lost everything i got
Everything i got and everything I had
So after all this, how does God expect for me to be glad?
You see my heart, is like a tree
but everythings fallen apart, just like the leaves
Then the leaves, shivel up and die
and that is how I feel, deep down inside
My heart is crushed
having feeling the wind's rush
deep down inside
it can no longer hide
It wants to come out, come outta the hole
just for a little, midnight stroll
But it was broken, it was torn apart
Maybe love wasn't ment to be,... well not for this heart
It may be lost, and needs to find it's way back
maybe this heart, has to go back on track
back on track, for new life
back on track, after everything that was strived
Time for it to start all over again
like starting a new life, all written in pen
Author notes
Written June 17th, 2006
A contest entry
- my last anyone can enter and pezzz do by Myth Of Twilight.
553 points, ended November 11, 2006, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make me cry!! by Just waiting.
450 points, ended December 16, 2006, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Five Options! by fallen-leaf.
450 points, ended February 9, 2007, 69 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - To You... My Love by pimp daddy satin.
303 points, ended April 21, 2007, 110 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My First Contest by fallenangel671.
800 points, ended May 6, 2007, 94 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lost Love, Found Love Show me Both!! by Ravenic Seraphim.
649 points, ended April 29, 2007, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love Hurts by forget my memories.
700 points, ended May 12, 2007, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Chances. by Things Fall Apart.
700 points, ended June 2, 2007, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Heartbreak to the extreme by Leech Lover.
450 points, ended June 1, 2007, 80 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - biggest contest in allpoetry history! (i hope) need 1,000 entries!! by Gasp.
1300 points, ended July 11, 2007, 638 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I Want Some Good Poetry! by kales4.
300 points, ended January 5, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Thank you for entering my contest! This poem was wonderfull and desctibed heartache right on cue. Good Luck!
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I would have to agree with almost everything you wrote. Especially the last couple lines.
Time for it to start all over again
like starting a new life, all written in pen
This was remarkable and caught my attention.
Great words of advice.
Good Luck.
Taylor. -
i could feel every emotion you has pooring out of this pome. thank you so much for entering my contest and sorry it took me so long to juge i had some personal things going on and i couldnt get to this contest right away but thank you and good luck it really was a great write.
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I really Like it its sad but with Promise of a new start... If I had more trophies all would get one but thats how it works... but anyway Thanks for entering it...
Dream -
excellent poem, it was awesome i loved the part
My heart is crushed
having feeling the wind's rush
deep down inside
it can no longer hide
It wants to come out, come outta the hole
just for a little, midnight stroll
But it was broken, it was torn apart
Maybe love wasn't ment to be,... well not for this heart
It may be lost, and needs to find it's way back
maybe this heart, has to go back on track
back on track, for new life
back on track, after everything that was strived
this was an excellent part and i enjoyed reading it.
good luck in the contest darling
keep writing
~Ashley~<3 -
Nice write.
Oh wow. This is a well written piece. Thank you so much for entering my contest! Good luck! Again, nice write. -
nice piece i like how you compare your heart to a tree. thanks for entering and good luck.
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great write i love the rithem of this this work was great best of luck in my contest
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incredible piece, or it would be if you had checked your spelling.
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OPTION 1
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this was a different approach. while most of the poem was about heart break,i like how in the end you found salvation in your writing. writing is always a hopeful thing. and to be honest. it's the only therapy i have. i liked that about this poem. it was really unique that way. yepp. this is definatly a keeper.
lol. thank you for entering. and good luck.
*autumn* -
This is a nice poem. I can feel your pain through the lines. A broken heart is never easy. Yes someday your heart will get back on track. You'll find love someday too.
Edited on Oct 01 because 'typo'. -
This is pretty good. The one part, "everything I got and everything I had" reads a little awkwardly because "got" is not really used correctly and what you got and had seems to be the same thing. Thanks for entering.
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ok... never mind what i said before i really hope that this is not about the same person that you wrote about in the other two poems. your hurt bleeds through the page and is pretty straight foward good job on all of your poems.
GOOD LUCK IN THE CONTEST
xoxoxoxoox
<3 alwayz
Nova -
I like this poem. The heart that was broken for being in love.
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thanks for your entry
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