My porcelain shelf is broken again
I am separated to twelve
Beside a path well paved
The granite façade next to me, remained
Honed to sheen fronts, his never break
Unknowingly still granting shade
Not long before dusk our keeper returns
Picks up my pieces
Polishes his old face
The wages broke pay
Are yearnings returned
As loved ones gather again
Plastic petals and stems
I’m look alive now
In my urn
On my shelf
Coloring the dead
Many things are broken
I think to myself
Yet what value
In stones weight
If not known
Their worth to replace?
Author notes
a graveyard view-a broken vase-How much a 'thing' is worth is acknowledged by what we will pay to replace it...Written June 11th, 2006
A contest entry
- project un-cliche by hks.
800 points, ended October 3, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Guaranteed Comments! III by Nam.
1750 points, ended April 14, 159 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
"I’m look alive now"
Either "look" is supposed to be "looking", or "I'm" is supposed to be "I". Either one works, what you have doesn't.
It felt a bit choppy, and dislodged in grammar from beginning to end, if that's what you're going for: well done, I doubt it, though. Could use a clean up, in such regard. Other than that: a nice poem that you have written here.
-Nam
-
Thank You 4 Entering Our Contest
Hello there im a judge for the contest above and this isd a mighty fine uniquely penned poem. I have never thought about a graveyard in this way but it makes alot of sense espcially with how you did this write. any ways a very well penned truly unique write. good luck in the contest
-
Nice twist on my poem, Michael P. Especially with the tombstones and plastic roses. Sophisticated write, much more cplex than my own. Nice job.
Adding your comment:
