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Brain Fart




Runny minds do make a mess
but not healthy to suppress
It will stick inside like glue
thick and pastey like a goo
 
Cells will clog, brain gets hung
a stagnant blob of useless dung
Gas will build and cause a cramp
you'd best expel... just like a champ
 
Let her rip ...drop a bomb
grunt and groan with much aplomb
Crap will surely hit the fan
and you will be one shit-faced man
~

Author notes

spontaneous bit of silliness
Written June 11th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 98 of 98

  • Ellis gold member
    December 20, 2007

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    Has to be from personal experience
    I'm surprised you're in existence
    After that
    Where you're at
    Isn't safe for man or beast

  • Yvette Champ gold member
    January 3, 2007

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    gal,this is so off the wall that it literally hits the fan-says the reader tongue in cheek lol and in a private memo will tell you why one part of this hit me in the head lol yes,don't let it build up to a runny mess,set it free or you may digress,blow your nose every now and then,let the brain drain free with liberty,on a different note if you haven't read Spike Milligan please try and get one of his many books he had a great sense of humour ,his tombstone even reads " See,told you I was ill!" Ooh am going off tangent and rambling and that's what happens when the pressure builds in the cranium lol ,love and light,Yvette


  • Blut Rot
    November 21, 2006

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    Excellent!

    As usual I love your work. I laughed all the through.do you right commercials(other than the feminine add?I loved that one as well Being a man who see's them everyday.)I look forward to more of your brilliante writing.
    Blut Rot


  • galfalfa gold member
    October 15, 2006
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    LOL..simply brains in your behind? Are you cracked or what?
    Is that why you shoot popcorn outta your behind every time you get an idea? How many times must i tell you - no eating corn if you know you're going to do some thinking or should i say, stinking the next day. You almost took my eye out

    thanks for checking this out..loved loved your comment


    galfalfa


  • majix
    October 15, 2006
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    Loverly

    Can it be that runny minds
    are simply brains in our behinds?
    Perhaps broccoli and cabbage
    could improve the mind of any savage.
    Mankind's best endeavors pass
    as gaseous thoughts blown out our ass!




    Edited on Oct 15, 6:03 because ''.

  • Zephyrcloud
    September 27, 2006
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    FRICKN BRILL!!!!!

  • galfalfa gold member
    September 27, 2006
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    Thanks for checking out my silliness - glad it gave you a laugh

    galfalfa

  • DarkOne24
    September 27, 2006
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    I would have to say that, between laughing til it hurts, this is one of the best I have ever taken into my brain. I love the way you look at things, and being a guy the whole "gas" issue always brings a smile, fresh.


  • crimsonphaery
    September 26, 2006
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    Hahaha I love it! Really funny! Well written.


  • September 25, 2006
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    GROSS!! but oh so FUNNY!!!!

  • pozo
    September 22, 2006
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    Great poem, which was quite silly and very funny Keep writing, this was a very good poem with good use of rhyme
    All the best
    Pozo

  • Susan E. Pennycuff
    September 15, 2006
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    oh my....oh my...oh my...lol
    clicking that return the favor button is like a fun lottery
    you just never know where it will take you or what you are about to read. gotta love that button for without it we might not get to see such funny writes.
    you did a great job here
    I just love it! lmbo


  • Wayne Leon Learmond
    September 15, 2006
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    Brilliant

    HAHAHAHAH. THAT IS BRILLIANT. Great animation as well. Well done.

  • nothingintheend
    September 15, 2006
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    Wow. The separate fragments of this piece all conjoin well to make... ONE HILARIOUS poem! Displayed with courage... honest, honest, honest.


  • September 11, 2006
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    Hahaha great poem.


  • mutilatedspirit
    September 9, 2006
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    I am reading your work one by one and I am amused thus far. I wonder what's in store for me for the later ones. Keep up the good work, this was classic, so fresh, and most of all, funny. =)


  • lie
    September 9, 2006
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    This made me laugh. You have a lot of talent and it's cool to see you use it for humor. It had great wording. Sidenote: The picture is awesome, as well.


  • Onerogueleft
    August 31, 2006
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    hilarious and enjoyable

    We should be so lucky to let loose like that. It had me smiling and laughing, the picture is great.

  • galfalfa gold member
    August 13, 2006
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    thanks ...appreciate you checking this out


    gal


  • dnecrosis
    August 13, 2006
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    Fantastic

    What humorous but all so true at times imagery.


  • wtchr
    August 12, 2006
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    If simple things like little farts
    Mirth and whimsey do impart
    Then watch while I get MY gasoff
    Believe me girl, you'll laff your assoff

    Loved your poem. I like the bawdy, ribald humor of a Rusty Warren or Benny Hill. Thanks so much for the chuckle.

  • Ledeas
    August 10, 2006
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    I am amuused and frightened....a rare combination. Thanks


  • Darianna
    August 10, 2006
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    Lol...that last stanza, what a killer!! I often expel crap from my brain onto AP...and people actually read it!!! LOL...Dari xxx


  • Tam
    August 5, 2006
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    LOL

    Ohhh, I needed a giggle today, Thank You!!! This is crazy, you have a real gift.
    Blesssings! Tammy


  • Autumn Whisper
    August 2, 2006
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    very funny!

    Great poem galfalfa, I thoroughly enjoyed this, great humour in it! Well done, keep up the excellent work.
    best wishes as always
    xElectricEyezx

  • galfalfa gold member
    July 27, 2006
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    Thanks for checking this out - glad it made you laugh ..i love silly too

    gal


  • Piccola Voce
    July 27, 2006
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    Hilarious!

    That is classic. I laughed for the whole poem. I love silly poems!


  • July 27, 2006
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    hehehe, very well done, we need more comedic poets like u istead of emo poets like me!!


  • July 25, 2006
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    excellent

    Humor mixed with reality that reminds us of the truth is a very good gift. But I love how you rhymn.


  • galfalfa gold member
    July 21, 2006
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    I noticed that skid mark on your forehead - never mentioned it ...i thought it was a birth mark
    I hope this means you are back to stay ...sheesh thanks for checking this out I've seriously missed you...


  • powerslave
    July 21, 2006
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    Oh, and hello again


  • powerslave
    July 21, 2006
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    I remember the last time I had a brain fart. It left a skid mark on my forehead and piles on my sinus'

    It was a massive one though, almost made my ears pop.

    Almost...

    But, alas it wasn't enough and my ears have remained unpopped since December 23rd 1997. Somewhat of a regional record
    Edited on Jul 21, 8:03 p.m. because 'Because I'm an incompetent old fool'.


  • galfalfa gold member
    July 16, 2006
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    thanks! Loved your comment and thanks for the heads up on your contest - i will check it out - hopefully my brain will cooperate

    gal


  • MissStranger
    July 16, 2006
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    This is brilliant!It's...brainy. I'm running a contest right now about the BRAIN and I see you have the humor/sarcasm/inspiration to disect the subject. Maybe you'll take a look and see if you can come up with something! I WOULD LOVE TO!


  • Tifferz--
    July 14, 2006
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    haha well said. i <3 this. its way funny.

  • Anne M R Chiles
    July 13, 2006
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    funny

    You made me laugh out loud!


  • wavelengths
    July 8, 2006
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    thanks!! that was a great start to my day! and it's true, i quote: 'never hold your fart in, otherwise it travels up your spine and that's where you get crappy ideas...'


  • Endeavor gold member
    July 6, 2006
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    Good

    Great humor, quite an oppisit of my writing. Thank you for a laugh, Rick


  • mitimse
    June 29, 2006
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    sounds like me when I was weening myself from lithium Joe


  • forever dreaming
    June 26, 2006
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    This made me laugh so much on this dull monday morning. Very well written. Thanx for brightening up my day. xxxx Claire


  • zt
    June 20, 2006
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    Ick doan know. Dey coot juss shuff you in dare chex und make hoff vit chew!

  • galfalfa gold member
    June 20, 2006
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    thank you queenne - glad you liked it


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 20, 2006
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    Vell,ick may shoot de Eichhörnchens wit mein kamera but ick vund be too grande of a nut for dem to carry
    Danke für Ihre Anmerkung .... liebte ich es


  • zt
    June 20, 2006
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    Spotaneous? Yes...like farts tend to be... You best keep away from those squirrels that you've been shooting with your camera. They tend to collect nuts like you!

  • queennefarious
    June 20, 2006
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    awesome poem, vey funny


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 20, 2006
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    Actually who's to say Hugh's take is right? It's a brain fart..release of gas and poo as thoughts and ideas thus brain fart Thanks for checking this out and your comment..much appreciated

  • froglover
    June 20, 2006
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    excellent

    I was assuming the poem was related to verbal diarrhoea but was not so sure until Hugh Wyles comment on the matter. This was an excellent poem, regardless of how one understands it, as it flows extremely well. That is making me think of verbal diarrhoea again! Thank you for sharing this delightful and witty poem.


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 16, 2006
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    Dear Hugh

    Thanks for the read..the very creative comment and the applause
    XoXoX squishy hugs and sloppy kisses

    gal


  • hugh wyles silver member
    June 16, 2006
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    Dear Wil,
    ~~~
    When stricken with verbal diarrhoea
    even best friends can't bear to stay near!
    Never mind how much paper I use
    in attempting to wipe off the poos.
    Whether spurting in streams or great blobs
    you can't quell uncontrollable gobs
    and I can't blame my garrulous muse
    for the stuff that's all over my shoes!!
    Any possible treatment by shock
    brings severe constipation and block
    but renove all the paper and ink
    and in time I'll get rid of the stink!

    Confhughcius (date unknown)
    ~~~

    As always, I enjoyed your poem nd am still laughing!
    Applause, love and hugz, XXX Hugh.



  • lovelustre
    June 15, 2006
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    lol

  • Daydream Believer
    June 14, 2006
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    LMAO!

    ROTFLMAO! This is simply hilarious!!


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 14, 2006
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    awww, thanks! I love to brighten days Glad i could for you Loved your comment


  • faderman1959
    June 14, 2006
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    Just what I needed! A good long laugh and this was it! You always brighten my day gal! Terrific!

  • halfjapheartattack
    June 13, 2006
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    laugh-out-loud funny

    Haha, you never fail to make me laugh. That's why I like your poetry. It's very light-hearted and fun. :-D
    Plus, your rhymes are flawless. <3

    Thanks for the comment again! I'm absolutely APPALLED that anyone would call their current lover their "old lady". God. They're not talking about their mother for god's sake.

    And I think your name definitely has mine beat. Heidi never fails to remind me of that little Swiss girl, living with her grandpa in the Alps.

    Anyway... thanks again for the kind remarks, and keep pumping out the poems! I love them all. :-D


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 13, 2006
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    LOL...after a deadly silencer no one would be alive to hear you rhyme silent Thanks for the applause and comment - loved it!


  • individuality gold member
    June 13, 2006
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    sometimes i let one rip-roar out
    and then i laugh, scream and shout,
    other times they're deadly silent,
    wanders off cos i can not think of a word to rhyme with silent, lalalalala


  • mzblondemoments
    June 12, 2006
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    Hey I try


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 12, 2006
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    LOL thanks Glad it gave you a laugh - nah, that little guy up there doesnt mind his own farts..its just others he cant abide but like a good business woman i notice you always pitching your product Loved you comment, thanks again


  • mzblondemoments
    June 12, 2006
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    I love the poem and loved the picture. Are you sure you don't need some stench-be-gone? The little guy up there looks as though he is in need! Great poem I needed a good laugh today. thanks for sharing.


    ~carol~


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 12, 2006
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    thanks vonnie - always a guaranteed laugh ..loved your comment Farting does mean movement is on the horizon - bowel movement


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 12, 2006
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    Why how daaarrrrrre you! I'll have you know i dont fart Never have, never will - i do sometimes, very rarely ...every once and awhile let off a bum burp but thats NOT the same
    Loved the comments..thanks for checking this out...


  • rufina caraid gold member
    June 12, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I nearly had a ‘something’ ism
    Thank god I don’t have smell-a-vision
    That picture made me laugh out loud
    Your mal-odious poem makes me proud

    Proud that I can call you friend
    When ever at the ‘bitter end’
    Of your nutty humour that I adore
    I just keep on coming back for more

    At least when brains are known to fart
    It means their ‘innards’ make a start
    To form a word, a sentence too,
    Yes sometimes it all turns to pooh

    But if we never think a thought
    Sometimes different to what we ought
    Who gives a damn, who gives a jot
    I’d rather have a thought than not!


    Vonnie



  • captain splat
    June 12, 2006
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    Blown away!!

    Oh your poetry is like a breath of fresh air, it flows well and worms into every crevice of the mind, basically, I would describe it as a joy to behold.. I would think it is pretty much the same as one of your farts..

    Keep taking the tablets, I am sure they are working...


  • June 12, 2006
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    Excellent

    Lmao, this is a very humorous and well written poem . You have made my morning after reading this one, lol. Keep up the great work.

    Cheers
    Terry

  • kartikey91
    June 12, 2006
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    Wow!

    NIce humour, the rhyming is very impressive....


  • Cherokee
    June 11, 2006
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    I think the picture alone should win you some kind of prize or something. Where in the world did that come from? The poem was funny too.


  • DarkenedAuras
    June 11, 2006
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    ROFLMAO That is so hilarious and the picture with the brain letting a stinky... this is fantastic must applaud must applaud


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    thanks Michelle - i really do understand that my work isnt for everyone but it's how they say it...is it really to help or is it to wound. There's a big difference. Thanks again - appreciate it


  • Sherry gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    Sometimes it seems things hit hard huh... Cute poem sissy its good you can write and laugh and not let it get the best of you. You are unique and special and there is only one you. Thanks for being you and my sister love ya, Me


  • heartnsoul
    June 11, 2006
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    Okay Gal, sorry for the comment on your page to the little one. But just felt it had to be said......now.....as for your poem....I was hysterical over the graphic....nearly peed when I started reading......too bad when you print out the page the animation can't stay along with it!!
    Gosh,,,,,there are some that really do need to get a life!! This is great! pffffffttttttttt... oops....(snif, snif) hmmm.. oh it's my dog! Thank god, I thought iwas losing precious brain cells! LOL
    ~Michelle~


  • heartnsoul
    June 11, 2006
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    Me thinks you've been in the Dark too long and need to let some light in. You are far too young to be this cynical about life. Like you never giggled over you or your friends gaseous outburst? Never blamed it on the dog? I say you need to grab a bottle of bubbles and get some magic back into your heart, fly some paper airplanes and feel the flight of fancy. Or stand in front of the mirror and make silly faces and laugh so hard it hurts. Then go out doors and have some plain old fashioned fun. While there is nothing wrong with Dark Poetry, (I appreciate a good Dark Poetry but it is not the end all be all of poetry)there is something more here than meets the eye when you loose your ability to check your brain at the door and have fun simply for the sake of having fun.
    Wouldn't it have been kinder to just say it wasn't your cup of tea? I think you would be equally hurt or insulted if someone comes to your page and tells you how much they detest your style and then rates it. If it's not something you care for then just move on...no need to be rude. Of which I will atribute to your age and lack of social graces. We all are in a constant stage of learning. Take heed the words you choose, they could come back and bite you.


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    er, um you mean to say this is not a masterpiece??? I wanted it to change the world..mayhap call the troops home and feed the starving orphans throughout poverty stricken lands. I had hoped someone would ask if they could frame it as one of the most thought provoking poems of our time
    Edited on Jun 11, 2:08 p.m. because ''.


  • Ogreatbaldone gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    I disagree jim, this is a fun bit of farting frolicing. not all pieces need to be masterpices, this was funny and made me laugh, what more can you ask of a writer who writes funny poetry that makes you laugh...peace


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Come back here..No i dont eat a lot of beans even though they are very good for you and loaded with fiber. My farts dont stink anyways Terry...come on back and pretend its one of your own - then it wont seem that bad Thanks Terry..loved your comment
    Edited on Jun 11, 1:31 p.m. because 'wont not would'.


  • Ogreatbaldone gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    it stinks-in a good way

    written like someone who has eaten a lot of beans galhands gal a book of matches and leaves holding his nose...peace Terry


  • rainyday woman silver member
    June 11, 2006
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    Excellent

    I could go on forever. This along with brain freeze has been a topic in the family for quite some time. You have such a great sence of humor. I'll bet it gets you in troble a lot of times.
    Cheryl


  • Silky Origami
    June 11, 2006
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    hahahahahahahahahahahahlmao hahahahahahahahahahah lmao hahah this was hilariou ho is... hahaha I love it gal hahahahahahah still rlol!!! Haha Love the time your spending writting PJ's


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 11, 2006
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    LOL..thanks! That was a typo Should've be one instead of on I appreciate your comment - thanks again


  • Confusicus
    June 11, 2006
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    The last line did not make sense to me, but otherwise this was a cute piece, how exactly does one's brain " fart"?

    On the topic of that last line

    "and you will be on shit-faced man"

    perhaps could I suggest " and you will be a shit-faced man"?

    otherwise, as I said cute, flows.. ( hehe flows....) nothing else to say.

    Confusicus


  • Shakari
    June 11, 2006
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    What hevnsdevilishangyl said!

    It must have been fate that brought me to this poem. I saw the title highlighted in the gold member green color. Then, I looked upon the title. One of my best friends always says she has a brain fart, which made me have to read this write. I loved the flow, the rhyming scheme, and the imagery. This piece was laugh out loud funny. Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing!


  • Thundercat
    June 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Read before you reject

    Galfalfa, what can I say?

    Poems concerning mental flatulence; I am lost for words. I like your idea which you just keep driving further into your own crazy world. It is very funny, and your ability to rhyme is, as always, amazing. I am writing to Asmodeus as well, concerning hiw opinion. I am befuddled at his decision to give you a -4 on a one-ten scale ?!?!?! While this may not be the sweetest smelling poem, it does have deeper "sulci" for those who wish to venture into them.

    "Brain farts" are common conceptions to most people, referring to poor or stupid decisions. "Runny minds" may be symbolic of some larger issue such as mental illness. Your use of idiomatic language also takes common ideologies and puts them through cognitive estrangement. "Let her rip ...drop a bomb" and "Crap will surely hit the fan" are idioms we use. In this poem, they are linked to mental illness and possibly any poor decision (such as going to war).

    One possible reading can be shown through a concept map to be:
    brain fart-poor decision-let her rip-oppression of women-feminism.

    Or: runny mind-mental illness-crap hits fan-tragic event-suicide due to depression.

    Or: brain fart-poor decision-drop a bomb-warfare-issues concerning governmental power esp. international relations.

    All of these issues are shared through the context that: "Gas will build and cause a cramp"-ignoring them brings worse harm.

    As you can see, these issues aren't for "children", and they could easily be classed under "dark and meaningful".

    I am not arguing against your opinion Asmodeus, but I believe it is possible to research poems to the point where you find something you enjoy in them. To Asmodeus: read before you reject. To Galfalfa: Never stop being you, I at least enjoy it.

    Thundercat


  • OnlyInMyDreams
    June 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Ok, im not really big on the funny poetry but this wasnt bad. it sounds like something my brother would enjoy or other younger kids.if your planning on writing poetry for kids than its great.but i think its good that you wrote a funny poem because most poetry that i read is dark and serious and its good to have a laugh once in awhile, but i guess that not everybody thinks that some poertry can and should be funny. you did a great job with the rhymning by the way. Keep up the good work!

    God Bless,
    OnlyInMyDreams


  • Devilish Apatite
    June 11, 2006
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    A real gas

    A very cute, "off-the-top-of-your-head" poem! Nice flow.


  • masterblaster gold member
    June 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Hi, A bit of harmless fun, there is a lot of brain farting around my friend,lol, well you can't please them all and perhaps some should take a look at their own work which often is verbal diarroea,lol,all the best, hugs Di


  • sarajaneUK
    June 11, 2006
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    hehehehehe, great write, short n snappy...when i saw the title though, i thought who, is Brian Fart?


  • AALouisiana
    June 11, 2006
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    A+ for making me lmao:D

    I saw this in the featured list and just had to come and check it out...lollmao I needed a good chuckle on this day.. The picture goes well with the poem


  • glispa
    June 11, 2006
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    hahahahaha this is great , hilarious and witty love the pic


  • galfalfa gold member
    June 11, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    thank you Jim for your critical review ...had i asked for one it would have been much appreciated - it's silliness about a brain fart...not really trying to change the world here but thanks


  • starwing
    June 11, 2006
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    this was hilarious... who hasn't had a brain fart... very cute
    the flow was good also..peace and harmony...shzoosy


  • June 11, 2006
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    this was a gas....he he. why dont you enter floorboards contest I think you would be in with a shot


  • Exit-Stage-Right
    June 11, 2006
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    Sorry Gal... you know I love ya, but this is... well... weak. Great picture, and good idea, but needs a hefty bit of rework. Cranial Rolaids are in order here.

  • r4dgirl
    June 11, 2006
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    This perfectly depicts how i feel after too many beer - brilliant picture, I love your humour and the rhyming here is superb, good work.


  • XxAsmodeusxX
    June 11, 2006
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    geh..

    W....tf..I can NOT stand funny poetry. I can tell you'll be one of those little kids' poets. But seriously..poems about farts? Gah, I like Dark meaningful poetry, THAT didn't even make me laugh it was morbidly disgusting, sorry my friend..on a scale of one to ten..I give this like..-4..sorry.


  • Melodies
    June 11, 2006
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    I had to control my outburst of giggles so I wouldn't wake up everybody at my house! Very funny poem!


  • leo2
    June 11, 2006
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    Yep, Mom was right.. there is more room on the outside than on the inside. Your poem and photo match perfectly. Thanks for the grins my friend.

    Sincerely,
    Leo Long

  • BlaqkInk
    June 11, 2006
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    Can't stop laughing.True humur and it wasn't even malignant.The small video lcip you have goes along well with your poem too.Keep up the good writing.

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