Trapped in her mind, unsure of what to do
Bloody wrists, never ending tears, it's all because of you
Turn your back it's not like you care
The only thing she wanted was for you to be there
All your lies plastered in her mind, driving her insane
Her heart is being torn brutally by the unwanted pain
All the taunts and insanity is what she wants to forget
She's tired of harboring all her gruesome regrets
Heavy metal blares from her headphones
She's has no where to go, her cover has been blown
How desperately she wants to turn back time
She's sick of them speaking to her in riddles and rhymes
All that's left are fresh wounds on a pale wrist
She wonders if she's gone will she be missed
Trapped in her mind, sure of what to do
She bled to death tonight, the thanks goes to you
Author notes
dunno where this came from. not to happy bout' it. tell me what you think please.
Written May 29th, 2006
A contest entry
- NOTHING BUT WINNING(501 entries) ( a truthwriter's contest ) by sweethelper.
300 points, ended May 31, 2006, 82 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! this is so dark. It actually makes the room seem smaller as I began reading your words. The vivid images really placed me close to the content. You have a great way of expressing your thought. I really enjoyed this one. Winks & waves ~ MIKeeeeeeeeeee
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I love this and can truly relate
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this is wicked good! so awesome!
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Whoa! This was an amazing piece! I loved it! Keep it up
~Ashley~ -
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooow ! this is one sweet write ! thank you sooooooooooooooooo much for this wonderful and lovely entry and best wishes in the contest !
yours
Truthwriter -
Thanks for your comment! It was greatly appreciated!
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Excellent
Absolutely wonderful! I wish I had your talent! Everything fits together so well in this peice, and therefore I say excellent! Keep up the good work, you should definately enter this one in a couple contest. It would win for sure. -
It's so amazing lol. I liked this one, the flow was really good and it was very well written and the rhyme scheme was very, very good. I really liked the lines
"How desperately she wants to turn back time
She's sick of them speaking to her in riddles and rhymes
All that's left are fresh wounds on a pale wrist
She wonders if she's gone will she be missed"
I think the last line in that set is a little awkward, yet still seems to fit so wonderfully. Great write, I loved it
xJessie -
Well maybe if you showed that you cared about other people caring about you we wouldn't be in this problem would we
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This was an excellent poem. It is one of the best poems I have seen on this site. You expressed yourself so well throughout this poem. Really excellent piece. Keep writing.
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Thank you for commenting, it was appreciated!
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Thanks so much for the amazing comment!!
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fantastic peice! seriously brilliant peice of writting. it flows seemlessly and the content is so clear.
the last few lines leave the reader with such an impactreally powerful. andthe first few capture you very effectivly draging you in and holding you for the duration.its very expressive and clearly composed.
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