Chains Abandoned
Crackling voices now were still,
Swirling darkness tests my will,
Withered roses, blackened die,
Why dear God, you know I tried?
The tides of life would ebb away,
In bondage I'd no longer stay,
I drift beyond diaphanous clouds,
A place remote, no haunting crowds.
Tickling breezes touch my hair,
Luminous colors, fragrant air,
Past the threshold was a sight,
Diamonds iridescent light.
From the window I could see
A melting, fading, piece of me
I called to God to take my hand
"Not yet," he said, "That's not the plan."
He told me to accept His grace,
Soon I'd find true love's embrace,
He took my chains and healed my soul,
He gave me hope, He made me whole.
Love is where we cultivate,
So in the garden I will wait,
One day he'll bring to me a rose,
And we will live in sweet repose.
Author notes
This spiritual poem is written in collaboration with my AP husband wtchr. It is written to the picture of the woman on the bed.
Written May 28th, 2006
A contest entry
- A Collaborated Trilogy....Winner Take All....1000pts by Celticmoon.
1000 points, ended June 11, 2006, 3 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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A sorrowful piece that still shows hope and light in the end. Your word choice was just wonderful and the imagery grand. Your talents blend so well together that it turn this piece into a wondrous poetic verse. Nicely Done!
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Good flowing verses, good rhyme, perfect imagination...what to say more? Good luck to you and Sam.
~Sonja~ -
Ahhhhh, Petroushka, I feel that you or your partner must have a bit of Russian in you. This poem is full of sorrow, loss and confusion and yet in it we find that there is a light at the end of the darkness, even if we are not allowed to pass into it, we know that it is there and that we are not forsaken.
Beautiful imagery and content, the blending of two artists and a great wonderful rhyming. Great work you two and I am looking forward to reading more of your work both together and separately. -
Well, thank you ery much Simply Bohemian!! There was no anger intended in this, more a sense of resignation. Thanks for responding. It is appreciated.
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Ramapntheart, thanks very much for reading and commenting. It makes me happy that you liked that particular stanza!!
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Thanks to you Bad Bill for popping in to read out little poem. It was a great experience writing this.
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Thank you for reading fptemujin. It's always encouraging to know that someone else gets something from what one has written.
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great collbaration, this is trluy a great pice of work written very well ,keep up th lovely writes
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Collaboration poems are great, as is this one. The verse flow so well and one cannot tell who wrote what in this poem. GOod rhythm and rhyme as well.
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This work is great i love it has great imagery and i love the picture it just so surreal.
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exelent
an amazin gwrite thenk you for sharing this with us and keep up the good work and exelent write
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I was taken by the harsh feeling of it, yet so frilly at the edges of this reading, hard to explain but I didn’t find anger it was more like
a feeling of sometime back.
The imagery was great and I couldn’t help but feel shards of glass..I know I am nuts.
Its good work, and its movement was steady and easy to follow
I LIKED IT!
I love reading others work and always leave some feedback
to show acknowledgment and support.
People work hard on their writings and they are so personal to them, I am graced that they would share their thoughts and feelings
and what a great way to get TALENT shown!
And you HAVE TALENT
A MUST READ!
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very amazing poetry here...you definately deserve an applause from thuis humble writer...your imagery is simply mind-blowing, that is all i can say
The tides of life would ebb away,
In bondage I'd no longer stay,
I drift beyond diaphanous clouds,
A place remote, no haunting crowds.
amazing stanza...keep up the great work!
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Very good.
A finely-written poem,with some beautiful imagery--well done.
Cheers,
Bad Bill -
This is a really beautiful poem. I thought it was nicely written and you really took the time to give a definate image to the reader. Very nice indeed.
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This is lovely you both did a wonderful job on it. Sherry
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