The sapphire sky held no clouds
On another day that we fought
The sensual curve of your lips
Formed no words of a lullaby
As accusations flew back and forth
I ran down the soft sand beach as
My tears formed perfect droplets
In the parched sand
Collapsing on an old driftwood log
I could see where a fire had charred the wood
I thought how our love was like that old log
Worn and comfortable on the outside but
Charred and black, leaving marks on the other
A shadow came from behind me
I turned, you held out your arms
As if to hold me, wrapped in your embrace
We'd laugh as if it never had happened
Except this time one too many words
Passed out lips. That's the tragic
Thing about love, you know where all
The wounds lie, so it's easy for the
Scabs to be torn
I hang my head, it's painful to look at you
Knowing the betrayal of trust that you commit
Each time, knowing that once your anger was
Sated, you'd act as if no crime against my
Heart had been committed by those lips.
Author notes
This poem is semi-autobiographical in that my ex was verbal abusive and somewhat about my relationship with him.
Written May 25th, 2006
In a list
- Personal (these pertain to my life) • next in list
- Contemporary • next in list
- Honorable Mention • next in list
A contest entry
- I Need To Cry My Everloving Brains Out!! by Angel With No Halo.
525 points, ended February 16, 2007, 26 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abuse: Many Types, Many Options, Many Results by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended March 20, 2007, 54 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 39 of 39
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How sad that we can be hurt by the people we love. You did great in this poem. My favorite part was that metaphor with the burned log. That was done really well.
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Merry meet,
Thank you for commenting on my work. It is sad, I unfortunatly know several people (besides myself with the ex) that this poem is all too real.
Amythest
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This is sad. This reminds me of my old relationship and yeah he was always flying accusations at me right, left and centre and I just couldn't put up with it anymore and had to leave.
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Crap.. LOL
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Don't worry Angel, maybe it's a phase he is going through. I truly belive in male pms, although for some it seems to last for several months instead of a week or so.
Amythest -
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OHHHH yes.. I do believe that very much!! He is better today though.. he has been coming in here like 10 minutes and loving on me.. Friggin dork!!
.. And they say women are hard to understand.. LMAO
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This was a wonderfully written poem. Your words were wonderful. The form was too. So sad it is about this though. I am sorry you had to go through that. Thank you for entering and good luck in my contest
~Krys~
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Merry meet Angel,
Thank you for your compliments. It is said that what ever doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. It did in this case. I held out for what I wanted and did not settle for who ever as I did. Thank you again for the Honorable Mention.
Amythest
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Merry meet MissPriss,
Thank you for your comments, I agree that verbal abuse is (in my humble opinion) worse because it leaves no visible scars.
Thanks for reading my poetry.
Amythest -
I can feel your pain in this in so many ways. Verbal abuse to me is worse than anything i can feel. i like the usage of the scabes being torn. Its a perfect explanantion. Great Write. Thanks for entering my contest and GOOD LUCK!!!
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Merry meet Captain Pike,
Thank you for the applause. Thank you for your kind words, I'm glad that my poem had meaning for you.
Amythest -
You are a most talented poet!!
This was excellent!! It was as if the pain jumped out of the screen and knocked me over the head!! I was deeply immersed in your world as I read this extraordinary piece. -
Merry meet neoladyem,
This poem is somewhat autobiographical. My ex was emotional abusive (probably still is) as expected to be forgiven after each time. Thank you for your wonderful comments, I really appreciate that.
Amythest -
This is really is desripited and imagitive of you. Yet I can tell it's really dark and sad. You did an amazing job, because normally I don't like dark poetry. But your work on this is just to cool not to like it,
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From reading may of the comments, I think it is hard to control what we say when we are angry. We don't mean the things we say. Or it isn't that we don't mean them but we could have said them better. In the end, there is pain and both people lose. Then all we have is sadness and regret. Love has many faces.
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this is a wonderful poem.....it has a deep meaning....i love it!!!
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goof effort
this is a good write. it has a nice tone and flow to it. the message is simple and clear to read and to understand. a good effort in it. -
this is a very good poem! i liked it alot! keep the good work up and keep writing and do what you do the best!! good job.
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now it is good to read fine poetry,wich this site mostly lacks.
Your first stanza is flawless,I could not think of better words to begin such a wonderful meaningful write the poem flows from start to end with ease, so well done. I normaly love rhyme only, yet your piece is so well written there is no need for rhyme.So I have to say thank-you for sharing your creativity and talent a 10/10 for shore from me excellent I will have to view more of your work.Take-care Tracey.
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I enjoyed this emensely we all say things that we regret hurt those closest to us and we all tend to forgrt the power in words both oral and written. Sticks and stones may break my bones and all that nonsense names do hurt.
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This is amazing. The contrat between before and after, the similie, it all runs very nicely. Keep writing, this is perfect.
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Merry meet Gwenevere,
Thank you for your applause. It is hard to learn to fight fair. Something my ex never learned. Thank you for reading my poem.
Amythest -
Merry meet Vale Of Shadows,
Thank you for the applause. Thank you for your insightful comments.
Amythest -
Good
I love the title of this piece, and it's an interesting and evocative study into the damage people can do through the use of words, which should not be used like toys. -
I was having a conversation with my loved one the other night and we were saying that so often when people argue, words are said to cause pain."Oh, I didn't really mean that", they say when the argument is done.Of course they meant it or they wouldn't have had those thoughts in their head in the first place.Arguing is futile and as you say in the end it tears you apart.A very sad and thought provoking poem, Ros
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i love it flow: That's the tragic
Thing about love, you know where all
The wounds lie, so it's easy for the
Scabs to be torn.
I hang my head, it's painful to look at you
Knowing the betrayal of trust that you commitare my favorite line tragic but put it persective for all who read this -
This is good. The title is really neat and the poem itself is very witty and beatiful. My favorite lines are the ones at the begining:
The sapphire sky held no clouds
On another day that we fought -
Merry meet Celticjedi,
Thank you for reading my poem. I'm glad that you liked it.
Amythest -
Wow...this was both beautiful and inspiring!!! I loved the descriptions, like their love being like the worn log. The poem flows nicely and is full of the harsh pain of true love...which sometimes isn't true at all. Great writing Amythest!!! Keep up the excellent work!!!
Best of luck,
CJ -
Merry meet,
Thank you for noticing that. Actually "were " isn't suppose to be in there at all. That got put in from a different draft. I write my rough draft poetry out on paper. That way I can see how the poem flows, something I can't do on the computer. Thanks again for reading my poem and catching that.
Amythest -
May I make a small suggestion...
I turned, you were held out your arms
I turned, as you held out your arms...would flow better.
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Merry meet crystal,
Thank you for reading my poetry. It did turn out a bit depressing didn't it? Thanks again for reading my work.
Amythest
Edited on May 26, 4:35 p.m. because ''. -
Merry meet blondone,
Thank you for reading my poem and for the wishes in the contest. Thank you also for the applause. Your very correct that verbal abuse does hurt and can do some major self-esteem damage in the long run. Thank you again.
Amythest
Edited on May 26, 4:36 p.m. because ''. -
Merry meet p-s-,
I glad that you liked my poem. It turned out to be semi-autobiographical. Thank you for your wonderful comments.
Amythest -
I liked this ... it was beautiful, from a poetic standpoint but also got it's point across ... what was that one part I really liked ... *re-reads* ... Liked the comparision between the log/love. Even because how love and log sound together (I'm sorry, that made NO sense!). Also the entire fourth verse. 'Specailly the part about the scabs ... Gives a dirty raw feel to the whole thing, accentuating pain, the ripping apart of the afore-mentioned scars ... of course, I could've just said I liked this.
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this is well written and for a hard contest I wish you the best of luck in this contest this is surely a winner it is with me and I know all to well about the verbal abuse it hurts....
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wow this was little depressing. But this was very good and reading it, it was like "holy crap this is good". Keep up the good writing.
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Ty for this entry in my contest. I also appreciate that you have read and followed the rules...Thanks, Trina.
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