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My Smile

I've got a smile on
summer season has begun
my smile got bigger

Author notes


Written May 23rd, 2006

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Comments


  • Flowering Star
    October 2, 2006
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    As a haiku, it could be better. To make it better, you can add sensory details and have a little surprise in the end-that would make it a truly beautiful haiku.

    Good job with what you have already. You can add more, take away some, to make it more poetic. I get it that you were happy in the beginning, then became even more happy because summer began. Actually this is a very good demonstrative Haiku for kids who are learning about poetry.

  • ozma
    May 23, 2006
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    Nice. Short and to the point. Sometimes it gets so burdensome reading some of the epics around here! If I had any applause left I would do so.