There’s a sickness to this world that makes me
Cringe
In disgust
and despair.
Succulent fortress of darkness
In human form.
I sink to my knees, begging for mercy.
Have mercy on the human race!
Please stop torturing them.
I sleep and I wake.
I wake and I sleep.
I toss and I turn.
Churn, yearn, and burn.
Hungry for the touch of irrationality.
Starving for uncontrollable urges of the fatal kind.
A storm has been brewing for many millennia,
Thunderous and monstrous,
Roaring,
Tearing through the fabric of existence...
The end is near.
Author notes
Written May 6th, 2006
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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very well done and we all have been touch by a bit of madness this is reflected and full of truth nice!
love and light
blaze -
Hmmm... excellent. You have just the right sight on this world and this society. Probably because I think the same as you, this piece has definite truth and wonder, it opens eyes for close minded people and yet creates a kind of rage and argument for others. Well written i wish you the very best for future writes.
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good
A slow end keeps grinding away. -
2 thumbs up!
This poem scares me because i agree!very intelligently worded,unique! -
There's a ton of poetry similar to this that doesn't rate a half word of critique, but this piece, while outwardly similar to that vast vacuum of abyssal baloney, this piece, REALLY packs a more powerful punch.
My general disdain for poems that feature the word 'I' more than twice would be upheld here, except for the fact that six of the seven occurrences appear as more of a poetic device than just a long laundry list of items that happened, or are felt by, 'I'.
This poem treads the razor thin tightrope of cheap cliche stretched high above the infinite chasm monochrome gloom poetry. However, this entry doesn't just whimper about the miscalculations of mankind and how the world would be better under a carpet of moss... no... THIS POEM depicts a scene
Thunderous and monstrous!
Roaring!
Tearing through the fabric of existence!
Ahhh, I feel A L I V E ! ! !
The end may be near, but I'll find more solace and entertainment in a "Succulent fortress of darkness" than in a virtual room of poetic paste oozing out of the pens of writers who are more impressed with their tattooed eyelids and black lipstick, than they are with the imminent demise of the planet. -
Good write. Very descriptive and quite heavy. For our childrens sake I'm hoping you're not right (says the eternal optimist!). Yes it's quite messy out here. At the same time there's a millenium of people trying with their hearts to clean it up! Thanks for the reminder though!
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Wow! This is a great write! I like the way you captured the world, and all it's problems in so few words!
1 - 7 of 7





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