Serenity of sleep when play-filled days
Have faded in the gentle quilt of dusk
A quiet time amidst the evening haze
The rising of your precious baby-musk
By twilight I can see your drowsy form
Upon the pillows as a range of hills
By forest-zephyrs of my breath made warm
Before the touch of deepest night-wind chills
I listen to your melody of sighs
The guiltless babble of a dozen streams
I feel a tender pressure from your thighs
But only with the innocence of dreams
In timelessness our sleeping pathways wend
Between our days a road without an end
Author notes
(The accompanying image is understood to be in the public domain. If anyone has information to the contrary, please contact me. Mb )
Written May 20th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- English Sonnets Please (romantic) by poets whisper.
900 points, ended November 28, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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That's my favourite type of Sonnet.
Perfectly written, as expected.
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Thank you.
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So soft and tendly you've written this
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That's the "feel" I was looking for.
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This is so lovely- read it a number of times.
There are lots of beautiful images here but I particularly like:
" in the gentle quilt of dusk"
Just lovely
K
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An exquisite sonnet that captures the senses before setting them in flames.
A pleasure to read
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Amazing, this is really a beautiful and captivating write. The couplet is.. just wow. I think I remember I tried not to like you in the past because I sensed a slight arrogance, but I can't help it. I'm a fan. Wouldn't be surprised if this got gold.
BTW did you just change the background to pink from black? Maybe I'm going crazy..
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Thank you. I believe in my work, so sometimes I might come across as arrogant. Also sometimes I get irritable and tell someone where to go. I'm not an easy person to get along with, I admit it. Thanks for your honesty and for your kind comment about this poem.
(No, the background is pink, right enough)
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Shiny Sis, would you believe little more than a year ago I couldn't write sonnets? Thank you.
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How beautiful! You must surely be happy with this piece of poetry as you have fulfilled your goal of creating "a ripple through the poem rather than the thump of marching feet". I do so admire you ability to create these lovely formal poems, dear sister.
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Thank you, Michael.
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Bravo!
A very finely done, and very deftly done sonnet! Bravo! -
Melodies, thank you. The poem is based on the actual experience of holding in my arms someone I love very much.
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Nevada, thank you so much. When I get praise from you I know it is from someone who knows what poetry is for.
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sweet and caring and I love it
Your muse is wonderfully at work in this lovely poem! A tender and loving message with warmth and love abounding!
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beautiful pure poetry
Mairi bheag, This is such an tender and eloquent love poem that's like silk to the ear, especially in light of all the dark and violent verse that I've been hearing of late. It was truly a joy to read.
All the best!
nevada -
Thank you Tala. I love to play with the sonnet form, and to let its natural rhythm guide what I write. If I can get something to flow - a ripple through the poem rather than the thump of marching feet - and convey the emotions I wish to convey, then I am happy. Thanks for dropping by.
Marie. -
Simple style. but your rhymes and imagery flow so well. Almost sensual, but very innocent. I like the calm reality of this, and your unique voice through the conveyed emotions. The metophors are skillfully placed.
Great piece,
Tala
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