Smoker Man

Last night Ah met the strangest feller.
His fingers and his teeth were yeller.
His chest was big and his voice was thin
And he coughed out air and sucked smoke in.

I shook his hand an' it felt lahk ice
So I asked him 'bout this strange new vice.
"It ain't hard", he said (twice),
"But first you got to pay the price."

"Ya smokes three days and ya won't know why
'Cause ya feel just like yor gonna die,
But then it gets to be okay
Unless you try to stop they say.

"'Course I never really trie to quit
'Cause when I try Ah shakes like shit.
My doctor took and EKG.
My hearts not what it used to be.

"Mah pressures high and better than that
'Cain't even breath when Ah lies flat
An' now about a block is all
That I can make before I fall.

"Ev'ry mornin' mah mouth tastes sour
Until I've coughed about an hour
An' smoked my first and had a cup
An' get that smelly green stuff up.

"I'd do it again, I know I would.
I'll tell you why: It tastes so good.
'Course it ain't all a waste.
There's nothin' else that I can taste."

I shore feels sorry for that smoker man.
Built his house all upon sand.
And spent his life and wasted his wealth
And most of all, he's shot his health.

He's the sorriest bloke, he smells lahk smoke
And he can't even tast the sugar in his coke.
For what has he spent all this sweat?
I'll tell you boys, a cigarette.