Somber moonlight casting shadows
On every creaky stair
Eternal numbing silence
She listens but no ones there
Embers from a cigarette
Still burning on the floor
Her head is screaming stop
And her heart can't take any more
The only one left to love her
Is her pathetic porcelain doll
They crucify her every thought
As they hold her against the wall
Her eyeliner runs down her face
As her tears begin to fall
She tries to drink the thoughts away
But the vodka doesn't help at all
They send her roses and pretty things
Stuff that glitters and shines
But they don't make up for anything
They don't replace her cries
This life she leads is not by choice
This is her only option left
She didn't choose this way of life
But this time she did choose death
A contest entry
- && I'd rather have a b r u i s e d pelvis;; than a //sha tte red\\ ♥ by PaintedParisPassion.
500 points, ended July 19, 2007, 27 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Life isn't everything, Death isn't nothing 1000+ point contest, LOTS OF OPTIONS!~Still open!!!~ by Soten-Jaganshi.
1100 points, ended September 7, 2007, 62 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Sad write yet amazingly written
Congrats on the two trophies that you have won so far
Great write
Thank you so much for entering my contest and Good luck
-♥Amy♥ -
outstanding, this is what i mean by depth.you pulled me in, very good writing,awsome job
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The only one left to love her
Is her pathetic porcelain doll
They crucify her every thought
As they hold her against the wall
oh gods, insta fave!!!! i freaking LOVE this poem. I'd be more eloquent and give you reasons upon reasons for this love. but my river hath finally flowed past me and i can fish no more pretty words.
thanks for adding this to my contest!
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This is a very sad story poem... I like it though.
Great write
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yeah, this was really good in a "alone in an abandoned house with your memories" kind of way. i liked the despair that came out in it. i felt your emotion and it cut me like a knife. most excellent
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ok so this is like ammmmazzing, and you totally followed the rules without me having to say anything, so im like in love with you right now, doll. This really was lovely.
The only one left to love her
Is her pathetic porcelain doll
They crucify her every thought
As they hold her against the wall
Her eyeliner runs down her face
As her tears begin to fall
She tries to drink the thoughts away
But the vodka doesn't help at all
Those were my favorite stanzas!!! thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
♥
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i like this a lot- i really do the imagery was fresh.. i dont know how to option you chose goes with it i dont know if you can explain its late and i have a toothache so im not thinking straight
but i luved this anyway ♥
-Cure My Tragedy-
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nice
This was a very nice and powerful poem thank you for entering it in my contest!
good luck
xo
kandy -
This is so very sad and in many ways if my life got a tiny bit more extreme then this would be how I would be feeling... the being held down, the only being loved when dead... that kind of thing. It's disgusting but it's unfortunately the way we are often left to feel when we are used or taunted. Isn't life unfair sometimes... ha, yeah damn right.
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This is one of the most powerful poems I've read so far. I like how you keep the reader wondering what happened to her, and who's sending her "roses and pretty things stuff that glitters and shines". Great job with using the words in the list. The ending I think is the most powerful part of the poem. The fact that she was never able to choose how to life her life, then she finally found someway to control it and choose her own path. Amazing poem, good luck, and thank you for entering
Jeanette*~
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