media.putfile.com/Turd-in-my-Toilet
Well, there's a turd in my toilet,
A situation rather weird.
The only thing that woman left me
When she up and disappeared.
A chocolate-colored token of
The one I held so dear.
A turd in my toilet, I fear.
Yes, there's a turd in my toilet,
Crap in my commode!
Floating in my Sani-flush!
I'm ready to explode.
Her clothes are gone, the car is, too
No checkbook do I see. There's just a
Turd in the toilet for me.
Oh, I can picture the scenario,
See her packing frantically
Throwing clothes into the car
To get away from me.
And then, a bowel movement,
Perhaps excitement brought it on.
A final trip down to the john,
A - PFFFFFFFFFFT! - and she was gone.
Problem is, in her big rush,
She forgot to flush!
And left a........
Turd in my toilet.
Big one in my bowl!
Watching it float so aimlessly
Ignites my very soul.
In a week or two, I'll flush it down,
Till then, I'll let it float around
Aim at it whenever I pee
And she can take that from me!
Author notes
Written May 9th, 2006
A contest entry
- Pick a Prize (Audio) Contest (Second Set Of Awards) by galfalfa.
300 points, ended May 9, 2006, 1 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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LOL!!!
This is really funny. Though, maybe it's just me, but I can see a sad side to this too... a nice light read.
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Of course it's sad. It was meant to be a sad poem! I have no idea why people think a broken heart is funny!
Well, maybe I do
. Thank you, miss, for enjoying this heart-breaking piece
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OMG Mike!
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encore! encore!
LOL..this still makes me laugh and i can still hear you singing this - it's a classic you know
It's really a shame you dont write more - you do it so well
Write another one soon and we'll do a duet
galfalfa
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This was absolutely hilarious. Such tales of lost love always move me. Thanks for giving me a chuckle... I needed it, being stuck in this office makes me crazy and you definately helped the day go smoother. Merry Part and Blessed Be.
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funny
I loved this!! It was so funny and clever 
Awesome job. Lmao I got a great laugh from this piece!
Kari
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