When I could know about your bleeding
the blood in my veins was freezing
my heart was pounding
Pain, I was experiencing
my knees buckled and I was shaking.
My tears started rolling
whole being was burning
I felt like exploding
and you were beyond my reaching.
A state to me so agonizing
My blood to you I could be giving
my darling with my spirit for you so caring
A heart of you so cherishing
And a soul for you longing and praying
I am begging you, heal well celebrating.
Nermin
Author notes
I would like to thank Dear Shahrazad Maftooh for her precious help and sweetness in addition to her patience in helping me with this piece. I also thank immensely Manoj EasternBlue who edited my poem and made it nicer and more beautiful sounding. Thank you guys
when a dear one or rather a beloved is sick one's whole being is disturbed and that is what happened to me in this instance the last few days with the internal bleeding of my beloved guy. God bless him and bless everyone.
Written May 5th, 2006
A contest entry
- LOVE IS IN THE AIR.......LET YOUR LOVE HEART SHINE! BIG POINTS!!!!! by ears2hearyou.
1200 points, ended April 11, 2008, 19 entries
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What did you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Oh I'd do anything for the one I love, to make sure they didn't hurt anymore as to me nothing means more than there well being, including mine.
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This was a good write.. Thank you for entering..
I really enjoyed reading this..
Peace to you, Jetleena
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wow. this poem is very powerful and descriptive. I really like the emotion in this poem. thanks for writting in the contest.
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Thank you for taking the time to read it and allowing me into your contest.
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Oh I hope he is allright. and Yeah I know know what you mean when a loved one is sick it dose disturb you to a level where you feel like you are being crushed with the wieght of it. Thank you for entering such a personal write in my contest.
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My Dear Dear Ellis, Thank you for your kindness and decency. Yes, he is a lot better thank God, but you know, this is the fast pace of life and constant stress and struggle that is doing this to all of us.
lots of love -
Fine Poem
I am so glad for where you say
Your friend is better now
I pray that fast will come the day
They're as well as good health can allow!
--Ellis -
very good
Very good poem. Best piece I've seen caring for someone in pain. And feeling the pain as if bearing some of the burden. I especialy enjoyed the beginning.
"When I could know about your bleeding
the blood in my veins was freezing
my heart was pounding
Pain, I was experiencing
my knees buckled and I was shaking." -
yes I do. thanks you dear for your touching comment and kindness. better he is thank God.
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i hope your friend starts feeling better. you obviously care about him very much. sorry that you are having to feel the hurt right now. well written. hope2makeit
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Well u know what i think about it...good i hope he feels better and starts making u feel better too...
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thanks my dear. i asked WJames to help me rewrite it so that it makes more sense. to me it makes sense because this is how i felt the whole day when i got his sms. but is it that obscure to understand?
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i read this once... ijust didn't know how to comment. but now that you told me everything is ok, YAY.
well, as usual, great poem, and i know this words are so pure flows right from the heart and it means so much to you.
best wishes,
L4L -
This is a very lovely writing. full of emotions and caring words, I loved the imagery you have created as I read through the wonderful flow of your words. Good luck.God bless
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My dear I thank you beyond all words, he is so dear and away from me, so it hurts me so much.
thank you for caring and taking the time reading -
very nice post well written and caring for your loved one, thank you for sharing and good luck..Linda
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hi dear Raneah beautiful,
well I gave it to EasternBlue and he made those changes that i think are better. would you please take a look and tell me?
thanks dear -
this is a beautiful poem love the words there flow with ease just a lovely write just one thing I feel a different backgound would bring out more beauty of these words, but that's just me, who's sick my dear? God bless you and your family may all be well....
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This is a beautiful piece my dear friend.
You're very welcome.
Hope he gets well soon.
Shahrzad
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