As we grow older
We realize this world is just
A charcoal picture
It is up to us to change
The way which we live our lives
Author notes
Tanka is a 5 lined poem with the following syllable count: 5, 7, 5, 7, 7
I've been thinking about society's requirements on us a lot lately. We often fall into the way that everyone else wants to live and start to live in the charcoal picture of society. Thanks for reading!
Written May 4th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- Spur of the Moment Contest...#11 by Samplette.
300 points, ended May 3, 2006, 4 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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this is a beautiful poem..its wonderful!keep them coming!cheers!
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beautiful in its simplicity. awesome
God bless
^Xerox^ -
I really liked this, even though it was only a 1 stanza poem. And I dunno if you know, but I like long poems, but you just pulled that one off!
Beautiful.. I wonder how you know what old people think, Tim? Anyways. I loved the picture and the message, they fit caught well together. And like everyone else said, I agree with it. 
Great job, as always.
*God Bless*
Sarah -
This is really good. Th tanks part is good. It is really true. There is a message here that if a few would know, our society could possibly be different.
well, good luck
*God Bless*
~*Chelsea*~ -
This is good...I think a charcoal sketch would show the incompleteness of life a bit better, but thats neither here nor there. A great write. Thank you for entering the contest.
Sam
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You are so right.No one can change it for us, Ros
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This was very well thought out and I can see your viewpoint in regards to today's society...I think of cookie cutter when you mention the way our world is changing and forming us into what they want us to be. But it is truly up to us to change the way we live our lives...thankfully we have Jesus for our awesome example!!
Great write and best of luck to you in the contest! God bless!! Noble1
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