If tomorrow never comes for me
The world will still go on
For those of you that love me
You'll have to carry on
I've lived a life that's full
I hope you do the same
Be happy in all you do
And smile a smile for me
For I am in god's hand now
And I take a final bow
So make this tear your last for me
And know I'm happy now
Charlie Eldridge AKA AmericanInIraq
Author notes
TO all that have lived a good life. THis was written for my Son and Daughter when I wondered if I would ever make it home from Iraq.
Written May 3rd, 2006
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1 - 12 of 12
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Oh I just love the last verse. You are in Gods hands. You made a comment once that you are a sinner....but it's nice to see that you have had a seed planted at one time in your life. My prayers are with you. This is a very good poem. I like it a lot. Blessings
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Very touching - such heartfelt and honest emotion in so few words. Thank you for sharing them with us.
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This is really appriciateable! But I think I have some suggestions for you:
"If tomorrow never comes for me
The world will still go on
For those of you that love me
You'll have to carry on"
Maybe You can rewite it as:
"If next dawn doesn't come,
world will still enjoy dusk!
but, those loveing hearts,
will hve to carry on & on"
Then the second stanza:
"I've lived a life that's full
I hope you do the same
Be happy in all you do
And smile a smile for me"
Maybe it is better as:
"I have lived a full life,
and expect same from you!
Smile with whatever you do,
just gift we same for last!"
Last but not the least:
"For I am in god's hand now
And I take a final bow
So make this tear your last for me
And know I'm happy now'
I will liek it as:
"For I lay in mercy of god,
and farewell my last breath!
Twikle the last tear for me,
for know I am satisfied now!:
well, these are just my suggestions. Think about it, keep it or delete it
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Very beautiful poem....you are so talented...I feel like you know how I feel....thankyou for sharing this with us
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This is very beautiful! a wonderful poem indeed you have penned. Filled with deep emotion that can be felt without a doubt. Great Job!
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This is good next time I see you online i will edit the contest so you can enter this and after you do il close it back for only new ones this one deserves a place in the contest-William
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love the poem I can realate to very well right now great write
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VERY WONDERFUL WRITE FOR YOUR CHILDREN,BUT YOU OUGHT TO MAKE IT A PRAYER FOR THE SOLDIERS SERVING OVER THEIR IT IS VERY BEAUTIFUL GOD BLESS YOU AND BRING YOU HOME SAFE TO AMERICA
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WONDERFUL POEM
You have penned a poem full of love and emotion for your children. May God bless and keep you safe from harm. Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem. Have a good and blessed day. Sandy
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I like this. A good right with true emotion in it. Written from the heart and I love that.
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good
this is a nice poem with much feeling.i l liked it very much. -
This is very well written and filled with emotion, your yearning for your home and family is evident but you seem to have accepted that death being evitable to at least think of the good things you had in life. I enjoyed this one and the perspective. thanks Bunny
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