Cowering in the corner, my safe place
I hear the chatter, I cover my ears
I feel the pain, I cover my heart
trying to shield it again from another break
I feel the emptiness, I cover my soul
again is was set free to soar and crash
The fear of the unknown makes my skin crawl
like snakes that swirl in, out and around the remains of a dead carcass
The voices in my head become louder
I cannot tell the difference between
what I am thinking and what they are telling me
I stepped out of my safe place
I believed, I cared, I loved
I felt the sun upon my face,
I felt the warmth of his love,
His words wooed me into an euphoric state
I believed, I opened up
Like a butterfly when it leaves the cocoon
I spread my wings, I took a chance, I soared
I felt free, almost weightless
I was loved, I was beautiful
He knew my soul, he knew my weaknesses, he gave me strength,
I felt empowered by his love...I was invincible had found truth,
honesty and the freedom to be me, to communicate my feelings without being judged...
The hard, rusted armor that had surrounded me fell off
In its place was billowing chiffon, soft and light
I was floating, I needed no safety net
I had finally found LOVE
Then the sun was not as bright
the warmth of his love turned cold and distant
His words were no more, non-existent
I heard the laughter of the voices mocking me
a laughter that I have become so used to
a laughter that I thought had ceased, but now laughter I join
I sit here with only the voices, the chatter of the past to comfort me
Amazing how the wondrous things and the beautiful things always leave,
but the Shattered Beliefs always remain
they become your friends, you start to believe them
to have conversations that last long into the morning without sleeping,
how they comfort you when you need to cry
they are your true beliefs..they have to be..it is all you have to hold
onto now..
Your beautiful butterfly wings are clipped
ripped right from you as you sit upon a pile of dreams
A pile that is stained with tears, almost shredded with dispair
They sit next to the regrets, failures and other Shattered Beliefs
But these surroundings are familiar to me, they encompass me, they comfort me
Deep down somewhere inside me I hear a voice screaming to me
“Believe..It is true..It is yours”
And I dared to believe, I wanted to believe it was true
to believe that this was all mine
What a fool...
Who was I to think I could leave all this, that I could just walk away
Who was I to think that I was worthy to be loved, completely and unconditionally
I humbly returned to my safe place as the door to Shattered Beliefs closed
Slammed shut as I stood there begging to be let back in
Questioning why I was pushed out and getting no answers
Recalling the promises that were made
Remembering how hard it was for me to trust, to open up and to share
and how much easier it is to shut down again and to toss these dreams away
Slowly I feel my body turning back into
who I was before
I suit up in my armor
as I lay the beautiful chiffon in a box
with the memories of who I was and may never be again
with the love that I thought was mine
with the tears of yesterday and tomorrow
with my Shattered Beliefs
Author notes
Written May 3rd, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- A Love That Once Belonged by whoamiamwhom.
400 points, ended September 5, 2006, 22 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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i am just speachless, your poem is so emotional that it touched every fiber of my heart. picture of sadness / hope / sadness, painted with beautiful words. sometimes it is so hard to give words to our feelings, but you have written well. take care.
all the best - sukhdarshan -
Lots of great visuals here, too many to point out. Chock-full of emotions to be shared by the reader - a wonderfully open write.
-
very good
congratulations on a very well deserved trophy with this exelent write, thank you for sharing this with us and keep up the good work
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this is really an incredible piece
my favorite so far I must say...
every word rang true to me and I almost cried
brilliance my dear brilliance
-
AMAZING.
Simply amazing....and I totally feel for you throughout the poem...it really touched me, deeply, and not many poems do that. Sadly, I'm sure that many people can relate, feeling alone and broken and feeling that you were played, not believeing that it's over and wishing it was just one big nightmare. Been there, done that. And truth be told, it's the worst feeling in the WORLD. You know its the worst feeling in the world, and I can tell you know it because of the way you describe it so well...and that's why it touched me...Keep up the amazing work, please. This is amazing, I can't say it enough. Not many people can sum up the feeling of heartbreak and find the words to describe it, but you did and that's why I love this so much. Thanks so much for sharing.
♥katherine -
Now you have made me cry Seductive Whispers. Your wonderful, loving comments really touched me. I am happy to say that I have moved on.This happened many years ago and as you can read it was a devastating time in my life. I realize that we learn from every experience that we encounter in life and I have learned much from this one. I learned to honor who I am and to never feel unworthy of anyone or anything. He will remain who he is and I will be greater than I was. I hope you are validating your feelings in recovering from your experience. We women are such nurturers that we forget to nurture ourselves and then wonder why we feel so empty. I had to be honest because it is the only way to heal..When I read the poem now I remember that woman that was grasping for her life, but she is not a part of me anymore. Thank you again for caring and I do hope that you feel a love better than you ever thought you could have or experience. I hope you enjoy other pieces that I have written. I humbly will accept any critique you offer.
With love and blessings,
Soulful Woman
Noreen -
Honest
Whoa...That was intense, and sooo deep. I know how you felt, i am just now getting over someone myself, and i'm starting to let out all the feelings i've kept bottled up for the past few months, and it feels great. This poem, was so sad, and lengthed decently, lol, all i've read here recently were really short poems, and i myself have written some short ones too, but yours was amazing, it was honest, sincere, and powerful!
Your beautiful butterfly wings are clipped
ripped right from you as you sit upon a pile of dreams
A pile that is stained with tears, almost shredded with dispair
They sit next to the regrets, failures and other Shattered Beliefs
But these surroundings are familiar to me, they encompass me, they comfort me
Deep down somewhere inside me I hear a voice screaming to me
“Believe..It is true..It is yours”
And I dared to believe, I wanted to believe it was true
to believe that this was all mine
What a fool...
Who was I to think I could leave all this, that I could just walk away
Who was I to think that I was worthy to be loved, completely and unconditionally
^That was soo sad, but it was worded wonderfully, especially the beginning with the butterfly wings.
Remembering how hard it was for me to trust, to open up and to share
and how much easier it is to shut down again and to toss these dreams away
Slowly I feel my body turning back into
who I was before
I suit up in my armor
as I lay the beautiful chiffon in a box
with the memories of who I was and may never be again
with the love that I thought was mine
with the tears of yesterday and tomorrow
with my Shattered Beliefs
^I know what that feels like, i've felt the same way, and i'm glad you dont feel that way anymore. And im also glad you've shared this poem with me!
So Thank you for entering my contest, i wish you the best of luck! You're an amazing writer with alot of talent and potential, keep sharing and posting, and never stop writing, you're wonderful.
SW
Soury this is such a long comment! -
none
Been there, done that. It was a mistake I will never make again! I feel your hurt and bewilderment - and a sad strain of anguish. You can trust again. I am just finished with the thing, but there is someone who will love you for the talented and lovely person you are!!
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