If I told you that I loved you
Would you accept the way that I feel?
Would you open up your heart to me
And let me prove to you that it’s real?
Would you tell me the same
And take the moment seriously?
Or break my heart
And leave mysteriously?
I want you to know the way that I feel
I need to know if what we have is real
If not, what must I say or do
To prove that I’ve fallen in love with you?
There is something in my heart
That I must share with you
Just open up your eyes and see
How much I care for you
There is so much that I feel
Whenever we’re together
And I don’t ever want to lose you
Darling, let’s stay together
I’ll do anything that you ask me to
As long as you are there
To comfort and hold me
With your tender love and care
I’ll show you a world
Where love is a part of life
Not just for a minute
But, for the rest of your life
I’ll always stand beside you
In everything that you do
And whenever you feel unsure
Remember that I love you
You’ll never have to be afraid
Of anything anymore
Just close your eyes and look beyond
Let our love open up another door
To another place in time
That only we will know
A place where we can live as one
Where our fires of love will grow
Let us remember the way
That we feel for each other
For deep down in my heart
There could never be another
To fill my heart and soul
The way that you always do
With endless laughter, joy
And the ability to pursue
Anything and everything
That I have ever wanted in life
Like having you beside me
As a friend, lover, and wife
With every breath that I take
With every passing minute
I’m thinking of way to spend my life
While having you in it
Trips and vacations
To destinations of your heart
Where we can live forever
Where our endless love will start
Where our dreams will become reality
Our work will all be done
And in the end it will be you and me
Looking back on the love that we’ve shone
I really do love you
And everything that you are
The light of my life
You are a shining star
I want you to know that I hold
A place for you in my heart
That is only yours and
Is set so far apart
From every problem, anger, and hurt
It is a special place unlike anywhere on earth
Remember this poem and everything that I have said
Whenever you’re weary or unsure in the days ahead
My heart is yours, oh if you could only see
Just how much I love you and how much you mean to me
I wish that you would let me see what lies within your heart
So that I could learn what it is that is keeping your heart
If you would only stop and try to understand
That there is so much more that I hold inside of my hands
It is a love so pure, honest, and true
That waits so patiently only for you
Author notes
Prompt: "Dear friend, I want to tell you something but I can't explain it...Stone is enough to break a glass; one second is enough to fall in love and one misunderstanding is sufficient to break a friendship. Friendship is the rainbow between two hearts. First I liked you, then I loved you...now I'm afraid to lose you."
I hope that you enjoy this poem that I have written. I wrote this sometime ago, it was a thought that I couldn't get out of my head one night. Thank you for reading and all comments are greatly appreciated! Have a wonderful day my friends!
Written April 29th, 2006
Picture Author unknown
A contest entry
- Just Another Contest You Won't Look At Or Are You Proving Me Wrong?!? by Xxthe angry gothxX.
800 points, ended July 12, 2007, 39 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Tell someone you love them... by Margaret Denham.
1900 points, ended August 23, 2008, 47 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Friends, I appreciate your comments and review on this write. However, please do not add my name to your comments due to the contest rules. Thank you very much!
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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This is a truly beautiful and well thought out expression of love and longing. You seem to have put so much of yourself into your words.
Thank you for your entry and best wishes in the judging.
Love Margaret
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This is a really great poem! I like how this started out with questions because that gives the reader a chance to wonder these things as well instead of just blankly telling about the feelings and situations. Emotion comes through really well on this piece as well. However, there were times when the rhyming was a bit forced or the flow a bit choppy, but overall the piece was good. The title could have been a bit more inventive as well, but it works well to reflect the poem, so it still works as a title. Great job and good luck in the contest!
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Oh this is just beautiful. Such an emotionally touching write. It flows so wonderfully. Very well done! Good luck in the contest.
Jeannie
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Devistating and down right deep
This is one of the most sincerly, true to heart, touching poems I have ever read. I've found some. But this was gorgeous, I think I also know of you. You have great talent. Thank you for entering my contest, for one. This was great, and if it wasn't for me being a young woman, it would have been completly relatable.
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This is a nice piece. I like the sweetness and commitment in it.
Best of luck and thanks for entering! -
lol. Nice one (to the comment above). This is a very beautiful write. I thank you for entering my contest and wish you good luck. ^_^
~Raine~
**I'd give applause but I used it all already...sorry.
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this is so amazing! aww love is awesome!!!
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'I’ll show you a world
Where love is a part of life
Not just for a minute
But, for the rest of your life'
I loved that line. This is very sweet and tender. He sounds willing to give her anything her heart desires. Great job!
-Dlvvanzor -
excuse the pun if the foreplay was as long as the poem i am sure the sex would have been damn good ...smiling here....
there is one line that bothers me "I’ll do anything that you ask me to" that to me is selling yourself short, because you have to have some boundries to what you will do and not do, if asked... would u jump of a cliff or kill ...i hope not.... i feel you are struggling with the relationship somewhat, she may be the right one for you at this moment but at this moment you may not be the right one for her... what ever happens i hope you find true love be it with her or not
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Very VERY good write, I definantly enjoyed reading it! Great job on the vivid details on it and I wanted you to know that I 1. appreciate that you made it long ^.^ and 2. wanted you to know that I totally 100% related to this poem and that made it even better! Great write and good luck in my contest!! Keep on writing!
♥ Miriam and Michael -
This is beautiful!!!! Great write!!!!
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Thumbs up! I really like this poem! I love how natural your rhymes are. I particularly like the "I’ll show you a world, Where love is a part of life" stanza. I like how your last three lines got longer, they are very nice. The only critisism I have is that some lines like, "And take the moment seriously? Or break my heart, And leave mysteriously?" are a little bit off beat. It isn't that that is a bad thing, but it kind of throws the rhythm off. And I guess that sometimes you got a little repititious, but there aren't many poems that don't, and it doesn't really take away from the whole package. Nevertheless, I wish I could write poems that flow. I envy you.
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Majpr Props on this poem.....excelent work on this!
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"so much more that I hold inside of my hands
It is a love so pure, honest, and true
That waits so patiently only for you"--this is what your verses say throughout with different images. A topic such as this will inadvertently invite cliches, and it did, but one should budget them.
A nice job, overall!
D
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I really love your work hun and this is another to add to that long list...every piece I have read of yours so far has been very good and again you haven't let me down another truly beautiful poem !!!
Well written and a pleasure to read well done hun xx -
I love it. The length is wonderful because I love the beauty of your words. However I have one small suggestion... the stanza..Where our dreams will become reality
Our work will all be done
And in the end it will be you and me
Looking back on the love that we’ve shone
is a little forced in the last line. So I thought maybe it could say...Looking back on the love we have won or Sharing our life as one. Something like that. Sorry if you take it personal. Please do not for I love your work. Hope that you are well. -
This is so long. I thought it was adorable. You must have really been smitten when you wrote this. It is obvious you couldn't get her out of your head. Very sweet.
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this is very good. Love is always so complicated, and you always wanting to get reassured. Love also ends up ripping you apart, over and over again. the last stanza "If you would only stop and try to understand
That there is so much more that I hold inside of my hands
It is a love so pure, honest, and true
That waits so patiently only for you"
i can relate to that, I loved, LOVE this one girl, so much, but she wasnt ready for a commitment.. so i waited, waited for 3 months, and then idk what happend anymore, but there was a fight, and gah, ever since then ive been nothing, jsut plain, bust still in love, witch sucks cause im sure theres no chance anymore. So i guess what im saying is, dont wait to long for the person to come around, cause you mgiht jsut end up getting hurt.
anyways great poem
~toddles~ -
This is really sweet, very heartfelt. If you wrote this for someone I hope they appreciate the effort you've put into it. I did think it got a little long, with some of the verses not really adding a lot that is new. Still, nicely done and best of luck to you in the contest.
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