I Left the Door Behind

Today when I left the door,
I headed for the same place ,
that every day I'm there,
but every day with unexpected surprises always waits.
But today was my waking moment,
for I am asleep as I am dreaming,
I did something only I could see,
I screamed, and I yelled,
"How could I be so blind?"
I never liked him,
it was just in my mind.
And then when I knew to ask
What am I missing?
If only I could see,
and to not be blind,
and to wake up from this rigid dream...
What a wish it would be.
To loose my appetite,
could be a normal thing,
except I felt so totally betrayed.
I felt shocked and still,
quiet and solemn,
afraid and full of fear.
One day will be my day,
and I will know to not be blind,
to look the other in the eyes,
and feel what is hidden deep inside.
Its the love I disgraced and put in shame.
Its the feelings I tortured to turn away.
its the singing of my path when I am lost and alone.
And its the noise of the past, when all I can do is love.
To love to betray, hate, sting, cry and weep.
But then to stand bare on my feet,
to meet someone else,
to tear the heart, and stab my soul to fall apart.

**** Whoa, OK this wasn't meant to be sad, but dear god that's what it looks like doesn't it? What the heck is wrong with me?WTH... Sorry, please comment.*****