Blacks and whites intermingled
To create a harmonious melody
Living among one another
But it was not always like this
At one time they were separated
Brick walls were built between them
A wall of hatred, disgust, cruelty
This was a world without harmony
Wars were fought, people were slain
To be able to take down this wall
Today, the wall still stands
Yet people can now climb over it
Author notes
This poem is using piano keys as a metaphor for racial inequality. I woke up this morning thinking about the piano and randomly came up with this. 
I was thinking of having the title be something like "The Piano of Racial Equality" But that might have completely given it away... If you think that'd be a better title, just let me know. Also, any suggestions for the last line would be greatly appreciated 
Thanks for reading!
Written April 23rd, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- Survivor 02 by Veronica Leigh.
300 points, ended April 29, 2006, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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A very impressive piece, Sharcu. It's the title that brought me to read this....piano being one of my two favorite musical instruments... so I was expecting something different in your poem. But what a wonderful poem it turned out to be
You asked for some suggestiond for the last line... those last two lines kinda took away from the rest of the poem for me and I was thinking that something in reference to the harmony slowly making its way across that wall, might fit the tone of the rest of the poem.
Maybe something like: "Yet now we hear the harmony drifting over it"
Or perhaps: "Today the wall seems lower
We can hear the harmony drift over it"
It's a beautiful poem, Sharcu, well done with a strong, meaningful message
ramblin
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Well, in some ways this entire poem is about a piano... but the entire thing is also about racial differences. I'm really glad you liked it! Thanks so much for your comment
--Tim -
I LOVE it!!!! I think that this is amazing. you begin by speaking about a piano, but then you switch to talking about harmony between people. you used a flawless transition, and it was freaking awesome!!!! Keep up the great work, and I wihs you the best in this contest.
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This is amazing!! I love how you used the Piano keys as a metaphor! I love this poem!
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I think the world would blow up if we all thought like I do
That would be a horrible world! But I'm glad you liked my poem 
thanks for your comment
--Tim -
Excellent write. I expected, as I am sure you intended, a poem about a piano not racial equality. Excellent poem, it would be a wonderful world if we could all think as you do.
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WOW
WOW Sharcu this is so good and I am becoming your fan by every new poem! This is such a good actually a great piece!
And the title is just fine as is the last line. I believe the words that come from your mind, heart and soul should not be changed under any circumstances because they are your words, your feelings and your emotions so just for changing them for the sake of writing "poetry" is just not fair and then no matter how good they might rhyme but they won't fit into the rest as good as the first one. I guess you have got my point!
And as I have already said and will always say this "KEEP IT UP AND KEEP INSPIRING"!
May GOD bless you!
Take care
--peru. -
Amazing. Good luck in the contest (not that you need it). This was an amazing poem, so beautifully written. Amazing!! <3
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You could probably write a poem better then I off the tragedy of racism... In some ways I'm glad I didn't have to live through it, but in others I wish I had so I could have that experience. Thanks for your comment and applaud, Shancy
--Tim -
It is well done! Do not change it..unless you really find something outstanding to change it to!
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This really speaks volumes. I lived through some of the worst of the brutality in schools in a large city during the first year of busing. It was horrible, a nightmare. I'm so glad things are better now. Thank you for reminding us of how far we've come. At least the wall can be climbed, now. Shancy.
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This is wonderful. I liked that you took this contest to a different level. Wonderful job!!!! The imagery and the ideas were both so creative!!! Love it! Thank you for entering my contest and I wish you the best of luck!
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This is a great metaphore, I was wondering where you were going with it when you started into the part about being hatred between them...but brfoe the end, I got it. It is really powerful as well. There is a wall there, and although we can elimentate that unwanted obstacle, it is still sad that it is there. This is a great write. I really loved it.
*God Bless*
~*Chelsea*~ -
Tim,
I really liked this.it was so thoughtful and clearly got the point across because before i read the authors comment i realized that it was about skin color.great metaphor though
kara -
This was superbly done.. I understood it perfectly and no I would not change the last line at all because in truth there is still a wall that separates the black from the white because so many have yet to embrace the fact that we are all created in God's image! Love ya lil bro!
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I'll be back later to read and leave a comment. My husband and I have to leave for awhile, but I'll be back later. Can't wait to read it. Love, Patricia ♥
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Strongly writen
Thought I'd return the feedback. I like this poem... concise but powerful. It conveys the message so well. Another thought to tie in with a title somehow... The title made me imagine how music must have been one of the only things that helped people cross the ethnical walls at one point. Just thought I'd pass that along. Well done! -
thoughtful, creative.. 10/10
I thoroughly enjoyed this metaphor; it was very creative, something I know I would have never been able to come up with. I also enjoy the message you were able to supply in the poem, too. Maybe for the last line you could say something like
"Yet people can now climb over it"
or
"Yet people can now eliminate it"
Just suggestions since you asked.
Excellent write, I know I didn't tell you but I was reading a novel and it was about a black woman who had a black mother with very light skin. Her father was extremly dark. So, it turns out she (Thea) got her mother's light skin and looks white while her sister Selma is completly dark. The book touches Thea's issues with reconnecting with her black first love and how people like her in-laws and a former suiter Phillip look at her in a different way. Her husband died, he was white, so now they are finally realizing, "Wow, she IS black." Prejudice isn't the main topic in the book, but it did remind me that it is still out there. This poem also reminded me of it. What determines the skin color, anyway? We're all people. We all have our beliefs, our rights, our different hopes, dreams, acomplishments (sp), all of that. It confuses me how some people still haven't even attempted to make it over their racial walls. *sighs* Luckily we're over that brick wall now, just some very rare people need the boost up over it. I love how this poem got me to think, very great write.
You will do well in this contest if the host feels similar to how I did when I read it. 
*God Bless*
Sarah
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