To see my love again,
in visions of misted mirrors,
an abstract artisan's portrait,
obscured by waterfall's cascade.
To see my love again,
in depths of deepest water,
shadowed by the tangled weeds,
where true light can't invade.
To see my love again,
in half light of the moon,
through tear-filled fearful eyes,
that make the image fade.
To see my love again,
in finger gaps of shame,
a partial glimpse of her,
through portals I have made.
To see my love again,
in my shallow window pains,
a reflected cloudy vista,
in panels of a rainbow laid.
To see my love again,
in my open own minds eye,
you bite away my lonely heart,
and through my soul pervade.
Author notes
Mamabekaboo rules. Option 4.
Written April 17th, 2006
A contest entry
- anything!! anything good!! by Hersheys Kisses.
300 points, ended July 6, 2006, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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window "pains" is a deliberate mis-spelling.
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good
You put me right into your little movie of thought. I don't get to do that much, it's like we were watching a movie together, first we were looking into a mirror, and then quickly sucked deep under the ocean to see littlel ight from above, and then in a park under the moon... Just awesome. I loved this poem. It was definetly worth reading. I, of course, being Mech (my name), have to critique and help a little though... nothing is ever perfect. "window pains" should be window "panes" and the last two lines of the poem are very confusing. I understand it now after reading it a zillions times, but maybe you could fix the wording a bit. I don't know... just my ideals. Take 'em or leave 'em. Wonderful job! I loved this! Bravo! -
Amazing
*gasps* this is amazing....I love it! -
this is really good. and sad. i really like it. you had a great choice of words.
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Great Contest!
Great poem,I loved it.Wonderful job done here.You expressed your feelings and emotions really well in this.Keep up the good work and best of luck in the future. -
Ahh...Vision. It reaches beyond the thing that is, into the concept of what can be. Imagination gives you the picture. Vision gives you the impulse to make the picture your own; it is the mirror reflecting the truth of who you are.
Lovely quirky word usage here in places.Very clever. Made me smile. And always a sucker for love poems, I enjoyed this.
Good luck in the contest.
~Fox~
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Very interesting. Thank you for entering my contest. I liked how you portrayed how the different ways you see love.
Because He Lives,
Beka
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