Inside my heart I weep
Do you see me when you come home?
Do you know I feel alone?
Is there any signs to be seen or
are we just a couple with no means?
Where did our life start to change?
Was it me and you remained the same?
Did we know it would be like this one day?
When the kids all grew up and went away?
Now I long for just a hug,
something showing me their is still love!
A mere kiss on my head above,
that would say it all my love.
I know now it is the kids I miss,
they are the ones who filled my wish.
Between all four I was adored,
now I sit crying on the floor.
My husband knows I am alive,
would he know if I died?
He does not see how lonely I can be,
without him showing his love for me.
Author notes
it tis what it tis!
Written April 16th, 2006
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Dark Hawk you don`t how much this note you left means to me! It has been awhile since I have logged on and something just pulled me in today, your words of wisdom were what I saw when I got here. I have been letting my tears push alot away lately. I found out I have FSHD it is a form of MD. See lately I have been in alot of pain and there has not been any reason for it. Doctors chucked it up to arthridis, from a car wreck 5 yrs ago. But I felt it was something else. Knowing my father has FSHD and it can be passed through genes I got tested.
Your right I had given up, I felt I couldn`t get the attention I was needing from the people I loved. Sometimes I do feel I have been taken for granted.
What I noticed is the attention was all coming from my kids and my husband now has a new role since they have grown up. I know of the ways to get attention and I have tryed them all and maybe got a few more for a new book. It is hard to get attention if your not noticed!
My destiny is to enjoy life while I can, I have taken control over myself. Who I am and what I want to fill my life with love. I can not be attractive to someone else untill I am attractive to myself.
Don`t ever think you words upset me because it is far from the truth. What you said made perfect since and gave me a look inside a mind that was closing up.
I will hold your thoughts dear to my heart...thanks for caring about the me inside ME!!! xoxoxo christa
Edited on Sep 20, 9:41 because ''. -
Passion's a unique mechanism that amplifies every emotion. The fire of passion leaps and grows with a strong wind of adventure and excitement, but dies when it rains day after day. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness and you can either supply the winds of adventure and change or steep in your sorrows and disappointment. But tears can only put the fire out and bring you more of the same. Tears indicate that you have given up all control over your fate and you are waiting for happiness to come from outside of yourself. That is impossible. There are so many ways that a woman can get attention. By nature's decree you are deigned to be the enchantress, the seductress that attracts the attention you say you want. Tears repel, or attract the wrong kind of attention and cast a mood of desperation and despair over your relationship. You can also incite and elicit exactly what you want from your guy. Takes a decision and action and it's your decision. Happiness is normal, feeling sorry for yourself repels everything that you need to attract. These words may upset you, but think about them anyway. Take command of your destiny or someone else will.
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THANKS LEO...I must of "wheeped " when I should of weeped!Sadly enough your right! Their comes a time when things really change and a new life begins..I try and take the boredom and make it fun. Grandkids help a bunch..xoxox
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Sadly this is the way many long term relationships wind up. In this case familiarity hasn't bred contempt so much as it has bred boredom. I can relate to this one very well. Very well done my friend.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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