These eyes that once were clear and bright
watched over me when I took fright
That smiled and made the world seem right
throughout each long and lonely night
This voice that once spoke strong and clear
with words that took away my fear
When whispered in my childish ear
hush my baby, mummy’s here
These gentle arms would comfort me
and bounce me gentle on her knee
She saw the things that mothers see
a child in pain or misery
..
Though now it is a different tale
a stroke has made her body fail
some parts are cloaked behind a veil
hidden from my sight
I gaze on her familiar face
she does not act to my embrace
while vacant eyes stare into space
silent as the night
It’s hard for me to realize
the person stood before her eyes
she simply fails to recognise
or even look my way
I take her hand and whisper low
Its me your son mum, don’t you know?
yet no emotion does she show
much to my dismay
A smile, a nod, would more than do
a sign to show me that she knew
that I am here, and getting through
sadly none appear
If you should visit use your head
think carefully with what is said
don’t speak of her as if she’s dead
assume that she can hear
I keep my voice both soft and clear
and hope to take away her fear
By whispering into her ear
don’t worry mum, your son is here
.
Author notes
Written April 14th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- Write a Poem About What You See Here by Timothy Cameron.
500 points, ended April 23, 2006, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Only Prewrites by Samplette.
1000 points, ended September 20, 2008, 41 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 73 of 73
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Extremely emotional.
Brought tears to my eyes,
Your pain is described perfectly here.
Great flow and rhyme throughout the poem.
This is definately an excellent write!
Thanks for sharing
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Sad and truthful
I have read some of your poems recently, and I have to say you are in my top 3 of poets here on AP. You write with feeling and with such a feel for the real. A sad poem for a sad situation, but put in a way that touches your heart and makes you want to go hug your mom, like, right now. Thank you for inspiring me to be more grateful.
My love and sympathy,
Harper
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Wonderful!
As having had a TIA (mini stroke) I know that the mind is working even though the body doesn't cooperate - I'm sure that you are reading her correctly and that communication will again be regained. She's in there - and we ask - for that chance that once again you will be blessed.
Mother's are precious - mine long since gone - I envy the relationship you have had - may you taste and savor her love in more than memories.
Your dedication is touching.
Tang
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This is heartbreakingly beautiful. The rhyme was very well done, and I agree with the others, it brought a lyrical grace to the reality of something so human.
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I think overall people have expressed my feelings for this splendid write. A tender caring touch, with concerned eyes is what I picture. The grief here is tremendous, yet it is coated by a love that only mother and son can share. You used great verbiage and formatting. Rhyming added a grace to this piece. Ending was perfect. The picture,btw, was a nice touch to share with us
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Excellent
A very fine write, indeed. Imagery, rhythm and rhyme are just fine. Thanks for sharing this poignant write with us. -
Wonderful poetry, the introduction and coda in quad rhyme and the perfect triplets in between marry with beautiful flow.
All this is outweighed by the wonderful loving but not overly saccharine content.
A great poem from a master poet
Jeff
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Beautiful
This was an awesome poem in honor of mum.
My heart goes out to you because i've been
where you are now. My mother suffered a massive
heart attack and came through by the grace of God.
Only to experience a major stroke in her sleep
two months after recovering from a heart attack.
After the stroke she lay in the hospital for two
weeks under life support. Her siblings requested
that she be taken off of life support because it
was her wish. We prayed as our hearts stood still
hoping she would survive. She did but she never
regained consciousness. She would look at us her
children and tears would fall from her eyes.
A sparkle sometimes in her eye to say I see you.
I hear you. We prayed and prayed until finally
after bein transfered into a senior facility
for less then two weeks she died on a sunday
night peacefully in her sleep.
Didn't mean to say all this but your poem
evoked those memories of her again.
God bless your mother and your family.
I hope the very best for you all.
Be encouraged. again, this was a beautiful piece
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Beautiful Words!
I was touched, made me cry. Beautiful words.
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Oh my friend
Such a powerful and touching piece!..I have admit I got choked up reading this.
the love for your mom is so evident in your words, and I'm the pain of seeing her in the condition must have been hard to handle, but you honor her with this beautiful piece of writing, and I am once again..AWED by your pen.
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How touching, sad, beautiful. The pain of the loss in increments, and the beautiful message at the end, she is still there also, somewhere, and her spirits hears and sees and feels. Bravo.
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Emotive
Amazing flow, impeccable rhyme. The three opening stanzas allowed me to relate, though I have never been through anything similar myself, and I hope I never will. You made this seem so easy to write, yet I suspect it was anything but.
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Wow
This is both beautiful and moving. It touched my heart deeply and brought tears to my eyes, which is really difficult to do to this steel heart ;-) Worth a gold in these eyes! Good luck in the contest! -
This is a beautiful tribute to your mother and one that touched my heart deeply. Your rhyme and flow are perfect and add to the sombre tone of the poem. I like the way you split the poem into two, the child and mother and then the reversal.
This was a joy to read.
All the best in the contest.
Sue
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This brought tears to my eyes. The accompanying picture really helped to hammer this one home. The dividing line in the middle was perfect, and really made a great transition in terms of the child becoming the parent and vise versa. Excellent job!
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touching, lovely, beautiful, sad, wonderful, ...
this is absolutely great. well done, you desere a bow.
i liked the part:
This voice that once spoke strong and clear
with words that took away my fear
When whispered in my childish ear
hush my baby, mummy’s here
it's sooooo unbelievably incredibly .....
this is more than outstanding. i loved it.
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this piece tis so touching... one of the times i was in hospital i was across from a stroke victim... the pain in her familys faces was enough to make me cry. atm im in a dif place... my daughter just killed herself so a whole different world of pain. my grandmother died after dozens of strokes... i never got to see her before she went but phoned once and she didnt remember me although the nurses told me that she had called everyone my name beforehand... male or female. calls too late... seems to be the story of my life. a beautiful and yet such a sad piece. tis it a true story?
hugs,
georgie,
xxx -
By the way, I won't mind at all if this poem beats mine in this contest. It would be an honor to lose to this one.
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Speechless
I came to this poem because you had complimented one of mine, but I must admit, the poem of mine you read seems flat and cold compared to this avalanche of love and emotion. This is one of the most heart-rending poems I've ever read, on or off this site, amateur or professional. Everyone with a mother suffering from Alzheimers or the effects of a stroke would love and identify with this. My mother is still with me and in good health, thank God, but this poem still brought tears to my eyes because of it's stark humanity and profound beauty. I loved the way you came full circle in the last stanza; how you're there for her now the way she was for you. Simply beautiful writing. You have a new fan.
Mark
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Outstanding my friend! I agree very powerful and inspirational! Well worth the read!
Blessings and best wishes,
Frogz~ -
A powerful write. Love is strong, and is a great encourager. Very well written. Thank you for entering the contest.
Sam
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Thank you So much Chrissie It is a sad fact that this is how some who have strokes are hit.It is now 5 months since my mother had hers and things are getting a little better But much of her mind is still locked behind the veil. She does smile now but as to speaking what she does manage to say makes little sense.It really is sad to see someone who was so talkative and active even at 88 to be left in such a state. It happened the same with my father so I did know a little of what to expect Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
My best wishes to your mother I hope things turn out right. -
Hi Legend!
I was just having a look through some of your poems, and spotted this one - it's beautiful! My Mam has had a couple of heart attacks and a stroke, and although she isn't at this stage yet, she is starting to lose her memories, even to the point where she can't remember who we all are.... it's the most awful thing... I can't begin to think what my Dad must be going through.
You have managed to convey here, many of those emotions, as you always manage to do so very well.
I have three most favourite poets on AP, and you are one of them!
There were a few months that I was offline, but am now back, so hopefully will be commenting some more...
Much Love and Laughter,
Chrissie
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Thank you Scribbles some poem actually touch the writer when they are being constructed this one did with me, as there were many personal things involved Thank you so much for such a wonderful comment I appreciate it
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Ok Legend this did have me in tears. It is very apt a showing a lovely old lady in the midst of illness. Thank you for sharing this wonderful piece. Thank you also for commenting on my poem
Scribbles -
Thank you for reading and commenting not all setters do. Good luck with your task
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Thanks for the heartfelt contribution. I'm just now startng the judging.
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Thank you so much raspberry I do like to try different things with my writing Sometime folk can get sick of the same subject This one though I just had to do when i saw the Image The poem virtually wrote its self I am so pleased that you found it enjoyable Thank you for your comments
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This poem is soo full of love
A very sweet write Legend. I somehow enjoy your emotional writes
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Thank you Pam it is always a pleasure to receive your comments.Though i could do without them being on soggy paper.
Thank you so much my friend for your comments that are really appreciated -
Thank you Light for such a wonderful comment,sometimes work that is personal is harder to put down on paper In this case it just seemed to flow,with hardly any editing .That it seemed to have worked is a pleasure to this writer Thank you so much for reading and commenting
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And oh .... I should have known this treasure belonged to you. ~gentle smiles~ A remarkable piece.
And of course you had my tears. Wonderful entry. Exceptional work as always. Best of luck. ~Pam 
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omg......this almost had me in tears. i'm here hugging Oreo (that's my teddy bear
) and i felt like crying. this is very heartfelt. and so well written. i don't have much to say...but dman...what wonderful word choice.
"A smile, a nod, would more than do
a sign to show me that she knew
that I am here, and getting through
sadly none appear" that's the part where i had that feeling that you intended to creat in the reader....
i like how you keep assuring her that the son is there, and will not leave her side. it's very well penned, shows so much care.
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Thank you Anna my dearest friend.Your comments are always so encouraging to the writer.I am pleased that this one so moved you.The image was so right for the thoughts that were going through my mind, that I just had to write and enter, if for no other reason than to relate my love for Mum thank you so much
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What a splendid poem this is. It almost made me cry. You really have a gift Legend... you can write beautiful humorfull poems, but also very heartbreaking ones. This one belongs to the last category, but I do like it as much as the humoristic ones.
The way you combined the mother's compassion towards the son in his childhood with the compassion of the son towards his mother, when he is a grown up and the mother had had a stroke.... I love it. Very well done. I am glad I did not miss this one. Anna.
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Thank you Sue Mum's a fighter and no doubt she will be giving me a rocket for writing about in such a way.She was very independent and would hate to know that she has to depend on others. But hey its a pleasure for me.So I'm not complaining Thank you so much for your blessings
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This is so lovely and sad. But the sadness is beautifully eased by the great love you have for your Mum and the faith that she will endure and be well again. I hope she will be reading this herself one day soon. Blessings to you both. ~ Sue
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Thank you Vickie I apologize for leaving you with the look of a Panda,it was not my intention to make this a sad piece all i did was write my feelings down.Thank you so much yes I guess me and mum deserve each other.She is a wonder and will i know get better Thank you for commenting Now straighten that face up my girl and get out and have a good time
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Just when I think you cannot outdo yourself, you prove me wrong. I just got my eye junk on to go out and thought I'd stop and read some poems and then you go and make me cry. dang you!
I think I am just going to go and read it again and cry some more and get it all out of my system. You just astound me with your words-how blessed your mom and you are to have each other- -
Thank you Mal my dear friend.for your comments and your wishes.both are appreciated.She is quite a lady my mam,and i know that things will get better if she want.Its a matter of making her want, as she can make her mind up to do something and nothing will change it.
Oh well I'll keep plugging away and hope to get through Thank you for taking time to read Take Care -
Prayers and rainbows to your mum Legend. A beautiful write for a very special lady , your love shines through matey, real bright...Mal
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Thank you Vilanger for your comments, as you say there are many takes on this image each one is in its own right wonderful.this is a contest that the poem is more important to me than the trophy.But it would be nice to win none the less.
though i see it a really hard task for the setter to judge with so many great works Thank you for your comments -
Jim Thank you for your wishes and for taking time to read and comment I do appreciate it thank you
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it amazes me to see how many different views there have been on this picture. you have written this very well and i wish you the best of luck in this contest that i too have entered. vilanger
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Gorgeous
My Gosh that is beautiful... well thought out... best wishes and many prayers for your mum. -
Thank you Lyndon for your most welcome comments.
It is always my intention to try and see life though another's eyes,as one can become blinkered by not trying.
It was not to hard to see though my mothers eyes as we have a bond that stretches back to my birth.(all i am she had a part in making)
I am pleased that you found it an enjoyable read.It is possible that i have failed somewhere along the line with rhythm,i tend to write in a way that does not usually conform to set patterns , mainly because i have little knowledge of how things should be done.
I just tend to go with my gut feelings.I am glad that it did not spoil the read for you Thank you -
inspirational
It is always good for a poet to get into another's skin and sheet home a personal and social conmment. In perfect rhyme, you have achieved that through your verses. (Here and there was a little unevenness of rhythm but that has not spoilt the poem for me one jot.)
I do think a man can get to the deepest feelings more truly but then I could be biased - just could be, mind you. Lyndon.
PS In its way, this is an Easter poem because it dwells on compassion. -
Thank you galfalfa You understand the frustration that can come from both side when it is impossible to make oneself understood.Still we have to keep trying just in case they hear and understand.thank you so much for your comments I really do appreciate them
Footnote I read your comment to Von, no Galfala its not me or any relative Hee He
Edited on Apr 15, 8:17 because ''. -
Thank you Jackie it was never my intention to cause tears, but it is a wonderful thing to say thank you
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Thank you Tearz always you say the right words, it is a pleasure to have your comments I thank you so much
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Thank you so much Eris for your kind words And the cup of tea went down a treat Thank you
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Thank you Dearest Von for your comments I know that you have much experience of this sort of thing, so you would well understand all that I tried to say here.I do not give up hope for mum as i have said she is a very stubborn lady .It is difficult to try getting though to someone who seems not to know what is happening.But hey what are a few hours spent trying after all that our parents gave Thank you so much for your comments
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I loved this Legend and have experienced this myself - in their final hours the most comforting thing you can give them is the presence of you and your love. No matter how unresponsive they may be .. Bravo on this gem...
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Beautiful you made me cry .
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Man ooh Man may I put the kiss of Gold on this one
This my friend was some excellent work,
Such a profound true to life wording,
This has touched my soul..
Love and Light to you always
Tears -
So touched with this beautiful poem Legend. Very poignant.
Cheers! Eris
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this is so real for me. Working for people with Dementia and my own Mom illness, my emotions went all over the place. How real this is Legend, how true of a loving son to go on hoping for the glint of recognition as a man when she can only possibly see you as a boy. A most beautiful poem. Either way you are a winner to have known , like me and many others, the true unconditional love of your Mother.
Kleenex moment
Von
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Thank you so much Dee you are right sometime we do become parents to our parents if we are lucky enough to have the honour to do it.Even as an adult married man with my own family mum always treated me as her little boy.
I know she understands she just cant show it.I Had it with may father the same so i do know a little of how to act around her.As you say it must be terrible to hear and not be able to reply Thank you for your comments and wishes They are appreciated -
Thank you WD for such a wonderful comment.sometimes things just flow nice and easy others need a lot of work. It is always a pleasure to know that one sometimes gets it right.
I really do appreciate your comments thank you -
Thank you so much Broad as you say it is very personal It was a little fortunate that this image was posted,it reminded me so much of how mum seemed .As i have said I fully expect mum to be conversing with me again,she is a fighter, but very stubborn, if she get it into her mind that she will or wont do something she will So i just hope she keeps that streak when it comes to getting better. Thank you so much for your comments and wishes I appreciate both
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A very touching, heartwrenching poem, my friend. Though I've never had to personally deal with this, I know it's a heartbreakinf circumstance. Sometimes I think about this affliction and pray it will never hit me. To be afflicted with such a disease would be devastating, it seems, even if I didn't even know it.
I do have an aunt by marriage, a dear lady, who spent the last years of her life in her own little world. She sat, day after day with a smile on her face.... reliving her past?, maybe... but she seldom recognized anyone, and then only briefly.
You've written so commpassionatly of your mother, and your love and concern for her. I wonder if behind those eyes there's still the memories which can only be grasp within her mind. In so many cases we become parents to our parents.
Bless you, and your mother
Dee
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peerless
legend, yet another phenomenal write.
The style you adopt where all lines rhyme, or 3/4 with following stanzas mirrored, I think is so impossibly difficult to do, even marginally well, but you produce these immaculate rhyming stories that are simply perfect. Peerless, absolutely peerless. The emotion portrayed is simply tear-jerking -
Thank you so much Meena as ever you always give me encouragement with your comments.Thank you so much for your wishes for my mother. She is a strong lady and i expect her to be rabbiting in my ears some time in the future.Telling me I did everything wrong when i visited Oh well thats mum
Thank you once again -
Hi Ruth my dear friend as ever it is a pleasure to hear from you. I am pleased that this poem was interesting read, I had to think of a way to bring the two periods together but show the were different times The only way seem to be to slightly alter the rhyme pattern.Things like that don't always work so I am pleased that you think it may have Thank you
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this is a very touching and obviously personal poem in which you have excelled, the wording is so heartfelt and perfect for the subject and the change in styles emphasises the two sides of the coin, you have done really well in portraying this and the emotion pours out throughout, It is always hard to see someone who you have depended on all your life become unable to continue in that role but it gives us the chance to repay them by becoming someone they can depend on, you have expressed this so well in the last line of the poem, I wish you and your mother well, Broad
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I'm sorry to hear about your mother..this image and your words brings the woman alive, and I felt I was looking at your mother..a touching and painful write beautifully weave. Good luck in the contest..take care~
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Ah dear Legend...another classic in the wings ( I surely think you chose the right pen name here for you are quickly becoming one ) Interesting change up here with the rhyme and meter from the first portion of the poem to the second. It took me a minute to redirect my thoughts when I started on the second part ( almost as if I were reading two seperate poems instead of one) but nicely done.
Ruth -
Tiff mum is 88 and life has not been to bad for her,though i do admit it is one thing she would hate not being able to talk or communicate in any way.but she is still my love.
I have not given in , getting through to her one day . Thank you so much for reading and commenting.You know i appreciate it Thank you -
Wow i'm so sorry about your mom. this is such a sad poem. i can feel the pain when i read the words. It's a beautiful poem. I'm really sorry. well great write.
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Thank you so much Jacqui, for you comments,
My father went the same way, and though his was not a big as mums ( we could comunicate by nods).
I have always understood when folk have a stroke the one thing most have is hearing.
I hate the fact that some speak in front of the person as if the were totally unaware,I always assume they are not.
I always appologise to mum when i have to talk to the doctors about her,say that she is not being ignored,
Thank you once agin for your comments -
i have just been visited by a friend whom I have not seen in many years, (They literally left mins ago) He came with his wife and sons, his wife has MS and recently had a stroke, I was talking to him and his sons about her condition and how difficult it must be for them. After they left I logged on to AP and this was the first poem that I read, and I felt a feeling of coincidence and fate that I should read this, I work as a carer and come across people in this situation on a daily basis. This poem has really put into words the true feelings of a sibling, and is a message to those for the grace of god will never have to be in this situation. I take my hat of to once again for a truly remarkable and emotional write.
best wishes Jacqui x -
Thank you Jim my friend,it is strange that this contest came up with an image like this. Mum had her stroke a month ago, and is oblivious to us.From being a very talkative lady to one who can not communicate in anyway is the hardest thing to accept Thank you for your comments as ever they are appreciated my friend
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My mother died slowly over years with ALS and it was very difficult for her and all of the family to watch. Absolutely nothing anyone could do to prevent it. My heart goes out to you my friend as I could at least talk to her till the final month.
Your friend,
Jim
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